


They Make Me Feel I'm Falling Down

by Harlecat



Series: They Moved Forward [2]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Bisexual Dipper Pines, Gay Stanford Pines, Other, Pansexual Mabel Pines, Transgender Dipper Pines - Freeform, also he spends most of the fic possessing mabel, discussions of past abuse and suicide attempts, except then i did, i didn't want to write bill a redemption arc, mabel kind of unwittingly gives herself magic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2017-01-09
Packaged: 2018-07-21 14:59:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 35,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7391902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Harlecat/pseuds/Harlecat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dipper heads back to Gravity Falls expecting a reunion. Maybe it's time he accepted that his life is never going to be so simple. The last time he was there, everything fell apart. At least that hasn't changed.</p><p>So to recap: Dipper gets pulled back to Gravity Falls by a phone call, and as always, things go from bad to worse.  Dipper just meant to make sure Mabel was alright, and now he's mixed up with the demon that is supposed to be dead, another that's our for blood, and the town he's tried to so hard to forget.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Homecoming

**Author's Note:**

> I AM SO SO PLEASED TO PRESENT THIS TO YOU.  
> here's the sequel to They Moved Forward! all of you who've been reading have been absolute delights and words aren't enough to describe how much i love you!!!!!!!  
> i went with this title because of a few parallels to the story arc, i also really loved but i'll turn my face away and the upwards fall.  
> hopefully this fic will clear up some of the things i've left in the dark in its predecessor and raise even more questions!!! i'd like to say i'm providing you with more of the wacky happenings of tmf, but also... i'd like to think i'm going to hit you with soul crushing angst!!!!!

_You always said I was a dreamer_

_But now I know who’s dreaming deep_

_You took me to the woods to show me something_

_But I’ll turn my face away_

_\- ”The Woods” Stars_

* * *

Mabel’s mind was gray, but it wasn’t flat. That was strange. Almost every mind was flat, like Kansas in the winter, or the ocean when you were stuck, just something else to hate about the Mindscape. And really, Mabel’s mind was _mostly_ flat. But in almost every mind, the only color and texture was gray, except for the memories and anyone else who might be visiting.

In the middle of Mabel’s mind there was a giant pink bubble. A second gateway into the mind was normal, but the color was kind of new. Kansas in the winter. Except there was a rainbow.

Bill started to hum “Somewhere Over the Rainbow.” Vera Lynn could always improve his mood.

Okay, new thing: There was a lock on the bubble. Common (and predictable). One possible reason: yes, normal, just striking. Other possible reason: trap? Third possible reason: she was just an emotional mess. Fourth possible reason: she didn’t like him. Another reason: she was bad at the whole deals and possession thing. Was Mabel Pines _really_ the kind of person to lock herself in? And should there be a lock there when she’d _invited_ him in?

These questions, and more, to be answered shortly!

The lock fell away when Bill touched it. Maybe it was just decoration.

He strolled (floated) on in, then opened his eyes.

“Wait a second.”

Bill looked down at his (Mabel’s) hands, then looked around.

“Kid?”

He closed his (Mabel’s) eyes.

He could hear her shouting now.

_WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT W A I T_

_Kid,_ he said. _KID SOMETHING IS_

 _WRONG_ , Mabel finished. _Wrong WRONG!_

_HANG ON_

_WHAT_

_BUT I’M STILL HERE!_

_YOU’RE STILL HERE!_ Bill shouted. _WHERE ARE YOU?_

 _LET ME GO_ Mabel screamed.

_YOU HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE_

This was bad. This was bad. This was bad.

_WHAT’S HAPPENING_

This isn’t right, Bill thought. This isn’t-

 _TOO LOUD!_ Mabel screamed. Bill squeezed his (her) eyes shut harder and dove back into the bubble.

Mabel was sitting in front of him.

_I HAVE TO GET OUT WAIT_

_STAY,_ Bill told her.

_WAIT_

_WAIT,_ he told her.

_WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT_

* * *

 

Dipper’s phone started to vibrate again. He shot another look at it. One call from Gideon had been one thing. Three calls was another.

Dipper bit his lip. He had what he thought was a very legitimate fear: if he pulled over to talk to Gideon, he’d end up talking to Mabel, and driving back to Gravity Falls. But… maybe not? Maybe she could tell him her plan? Maybe they could share a proper goodbye?

He pulled over, and reached for his phone. But he was too late, and Gideon went to voicemail.

His screen showed three missed calls. But more important, he had a text from Mabel.

_Didn’t get the chance to say goodbye to you, Dipshit. Wanted to wish you luck and send you all my love. Don’t worry about me, I’m taking care of things. You might not hear from me for awhile, but I’m okay <3._

He smiled at the screen. Gideon started to call again.

Dipper answered on the second ring. “Gideon?” he asked.

 _“Dipper!”_ Gideon said, with so much volume that Dipper had to pull his phone away from his ear. He switched over to speaker and put his phone down

“Hey, man.”

_“Did you hear my voicemail?”_

“No, but listen, it's all good. Mabel just texted me and-”

 _“I lied! Mabel was here. She_ is _here.”_

“What?” Dipper had been moving to start driving again, but he quickly switched gears back into park. Gideon had lied about having Mabel. He instantly jumped to the worst conclusion: Mabel had been kidnapped. “She is? Why didn't you tell me? Did you-”

 _“She came over yesterday,”_ Gideon explained, speaking so fast it was hard to understand him. _“She told me I couldn’t tell you she was here and that I was supposed to watch her sleep and not let anyone move her-“_

 _Oh,_ Dipper thought, biting his lip. _Oh._

 _“But then when she woke up this morning she was acting really strange,”_ Gideon said. _“And she- well- she- she_ screamed _at me and said some_ very _hurtful things then locked herself in my attic to- she said she wanted- poor thing, I think you better get over here.”_

Dipper nodded. “I’m on my way.” He shifted gears and turned Lisa around. Once again, his mind jumped to the worst conclusion. “What did Mabel say she wanted to do?”

_“Well, she- said she wanted to- summon- a-“_

“Summon a demon?”

_“... Yes, a demon.”_

Dipper calmed down a little bit. That hadn’t been his assumption. He’d kind of gotten worried about Mabel’s mental state for a moment. It hadn’t been good lately, and sometimes her bad thoughts could spiral out of control. Especially when she was sleep deprived.

“Did she say what demon?”

_“No, but I- I could guess.”_

It sounded like she’d probably tried to summon Tony. He had no idea _why._ Maybe she’d wanted to fight him, or had gotten tired of waiting? But if Dipper pushed the speed limit, he could probably get there in time to stop her.

“Has she done it yet?”

_“Well… I don’t rightfully know. I can ask!”_

“Bad idea. Just in case. But if it was a super bad situation, you’d probably know. Is she still upstairs?”

_“Yes, I can hear her.”_

“Good. I’m heading your way.”

_“You’re not leaving town?”_

“It was kind of a rushed decision, I'd really rather stay. Alright, I'm about to head into a thick bit of woods here. I'll be there in an hour. Don't let her leave unless shit goes down or something.”

Dipper floored the fucking pedal. He'd been driving for several hours, but made it back to Gravity Falls in one- without obeying the laws of traffic, and driving very unsafely for the weather.

The rain was getting stronger when he finally pulled up to Gideon’s at a quarter till five. The second he parked, the front door opened. Gideon rushed over with an umbrella, and Dipper ducked under it to follow him in.

“Thanks,” he said as the door shut. Gideon snapped the umbrella closed.

“Don't mention it,” he said coolly, as if Dipper’s presence had reminded him that, even if he could help out with Mabel, he still hated him. That was fine. Dipper didn’t like him either.

“So what's going on?” Dipper asked.

Gideon frowned. “I couldn't tell you. She'd gotten the room all ready, but I went in to check on her about twenty minutes back and she'd cleaned it all up. Oh, those are yours.” Gideon gestured to his kitchen table, where several books and folders were stacked neatly. “Some might be hers, too. I just took my stuff back.”

“Why'd you check on her?”

“I could hear her talking.” Gideon crossed into his kitchen. Dipper followed him and sat down. Gideon turned his sink on and started to wash his hands. He washed them twice before snatching a towel off the fridge to dry them. “Can I get you anything?”

“I'm fine, thanks. What was she saying?”

“I don't know. It sounded like she was talking to herself. Her… volume went up just over an hour ago, so I called you.”

“That's what, three thirty, maybe? Three forty five?”

Gideon nodded. “Sure you don't want coffee?”

Dipper hadn't heard a single sound since he entered the house.

“I'm fine. Where is Mabel now?”

“Upstairs, like I said.”

“You didn't say that.”

“Pardon me, I'm a little frazzled.” Gideon opened the fridge. “Can I offer you a snack?”

“No thank you.”

“Mabel, your brother’s here!” Gideon called, glancing up. He pulled out a pudding cup and sat down to eat it on the counter, opening up a drawer to fish for silverware. “I'm a bit of a stress eater.”

“What's there to be stressed about? Mabel's fine, isn't she? Nothing's happened?”

Gideon looked pointedly at his pudding cup, and stuck a spoon of it into his mouth.

“Gideon?”

“Mmph.”

“You're acting really-”

“ _Fucking fuck!”_ a voice upstairs screeched.

* * *

 

Bill grabbed his (Mabel’s) hair. This was so bad. This was so bad-

“ _What do you mean, you don't know?!”_ Mabel demanded, her voice ringing in his (her?) head. _“You're the demon here!”_

“This doesn't normally happen! It's-” _shake the hand, give a pull, soul pops out! You just slide in! I_ “don't know what was different!”

_“Stop shouting!”_

“I'm not shouting!” Bill kicked his empty juice box over. “All the food is gone and I'm starting to panic!”

_“You're probably freaking Gideon out! Stop acting so suspicious! Be cool!”_

_I am_ “cool!”

_“And stop talking out loud!”_

“I'm” _not!_

 _“You barely got him to leave when he came in earlier,”_ Mabel told him. _“You're not gonna get lucky again-”_

“Mabel, your brother’s here!” Gideon shouted from downstairs.

_“Shit! Be cool, be cool. Shh. Drink some juice.”_

_All the juice is gone!_

_“Then just be cool. We’ll get more later.”_

_This is so bad, what if I'm stuck, if you die and I'm_

_“I'm not gonna die!”_

_Let me_ think!

_“Stop thinking so loud!”_

_Oh, sorry! I'll just_ think quieter _!_

_“Bill!”_

“Fucking fuck!” Bill screamed, and immediately covered his mouth, then somehow fell over. “Shit, that one got out. _Heck_. Sh _it.”_

 _“Okay,”_ Mabel said, in a reassuring tone. “ _We just need to calm down! And maybe stand up!”_

_But I tried that! I ate all the chips! It didn't help!_

_“No, now we have a reason to calm down. You're gonna calm down, tell Dipper we’re fine, and ask him to buy you a plane ticket to someplace nice. Then you go on vacation and try not to be too expensive.”_

_I hate this I hate this I hate this_

_“Calm,”_ Mabel said. _“Think about whatever calms you.”_

 _Ducks stuffed with spiders,_ Bill thought. _Baby ducks filled with thousands of tiny spiders. Spider explosion! Ahh! So many!_

 _“Okay,”_ Mabel clucked her tongue. _“Whatever floats your boat.”_

Bill wiped his (Mabel’s?) cheeks off. They’d gotten wet. There were footsteps on the stairs. Bill stood up, and grabbed the chair for support.

_Gravity is-_

_“Annoying, now let go of the chair, you look like you can't walk. Humans with working legs can walk.”_

Bill let go of the chair and decided he hated balancing. This was definitely his worst day of the last few years.

_“I have sunglasses in my bag.”_

Bill grabbed the bag and found them. _Pupils! You're brilliant._ He put them on. “Okay, we're good. Ungh, your depth perception is so- _weird_ -”

_“Just try to breathe evenly.”_

“Mabel?” Gideon called from the other side of the door. “Dipper’s here.”

_Door’s open!_

_“No, you have to use your mouth.”_

“Door’s open!” Bill answered. Smile? Yes, people smiled at each other. He smiled at Gideon as the door opened. “Hey, ki- Gid. Eon. Hey!”

Gideon looked concerned, but not as put off as he'd been a little while back, when Bill had called him “pal” and “kid” within the same breath.

Dipper was right behind Gideon. “Mabel!”

He dove onto Bill and grabbed him.

 _Hug hug hug hug hug_ Bill thought.

 _“Just follow my lead,”_ Mabel said. Bill felt her guiding his movements, and wrapped his arms around Dipper.

_Oh man. This is awful. Why do people touch each other? This is so awful._

_“Remind me to hug you sometime. Now, talk to Dipper.”_

_I thought you were wait_ “I thought you were heading out of town?”

Dipper pulled back, and Bill nearly screamed with relief. “I don't know, guess I got turned around. Hey, do you need a ride back to the Shack? Where's the Stanley Mobile?”

“The… Stanley…”

“Don't worry, I’ll give you a ride back in Lisa.”

Bill nodded. He didn't have any idea what Dipper was talking about. Something else he didn't like about this situation.

Dipper grabbed his hand. “I'll meet you in the car, okay? Gideon, I can help you with the food wrappers.”

Bill nodded again. He reached for Mabel’s bag and didn't quite get it, thank you, depth perception, grabbed Mabel’s bag and moved toward the stairs. Leaning heavily on the railing, he made his way to the first floor.

 _“Get my folders,”_ Mabel said. _“They’re on the table.”_

Bill nodded and cut into the kitchen. He opened up Mabel’s backpack and shoved all the papers in, and then made his way outside, through the thick rain, and into the car. He pulled off the sunglasses to look at his (Mabel’s) eyes in the mirror.

“Okay,” he said. “I'm still _visually_ possessing you. We're just having- _transmission_ issues. Normally, you’d kind of- pop up next to me- like a, a little ghostie or something, but, um- where are you?”

_“I don’t know, in my normal head?”_

_“_ So… we’re both here?”

_“I guess.”_

“Well, that’s, uh- great! That’s just- totally normal, no need to be worried. You good?”

_“No. I'm upset.”_

“Well, jeez! It's not my fault! He's coming.” Bill shoved the glasses back on. “Look, we’ll sort this out back at your house. I'll stick to the deal and leave them all alone, you just be quiet and let me do what I do. I'm a _master_ of disguise.”

_“But Bill, the Shack-”_

_Shh!_

Dipper dropped into the driver's seat. “You ready to go?”

Bill folded his hands neatly and nodded.

“Cool. We should have leftovers from last night unless Ford ate them. Alright, we're off.”

Dipper stepped on the gas, and Bill pressed himself down in the seat. He wasn't used to fast cars. This was going to be a long ride.


	2. The Return

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had really long notes written out for this chapter but then my wifi crashed :/ not 100% happy with this chapter but i wasn't so great today and wanted to update, mainly nervous about my biiiiig surgery tomorrow (wisdom teeth are getting pulled out a year late) but also phone anxiety or whatever it is i have about calling people (on the bright side i have a phone convo w calarts coming up!!!!) also, playlist is in the fic!!!! feel free to recommend songs based off the last fic or as it goes on, this one!  
> without further ado...

_**[Here's the playlist!](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3plHgKghKM-izwjocne9nw52s3WAsIZL) ** _

* * *

_She's gone, she left before you woke, as you ate last night, neither of you spoke_   
_Dishes, T.V., bed, the darkness filled with dread_

_\- "In Our Bedroom After the War" Stars_

* * *

 

“Can you play some music?” Dipper tossed Bill a cord, and sped through the town. “Oh, hey, there’s the Stanley Mobile. You can drive her home later.”

“Sure, sure.” Bill nodded for what felt like the fifth time and held up the cord. How did he play music with this again? What music playing device did he have? Phones. Phones played music now, that had happened. Where did Mabel keep her phone? _Her backpack?_ Bill reached behind him to wrestle the bag off. It made his arms hurt.

Dipper glanced over at him. “Dude, I think it would help if you took your seatbelt off?”

“Right.” Bill took off the seatbelt and shrugged off the backpack, then put his seatbelt back on. He unzipped it and started to look around. He finally found her phone in the third pocket. The cord fit into one of the ports, and Bill turned it on. What was Mabel’s password? _T-W-I-N._ 8946\. No? _S-T-A-R._ 7827\. No? Not that one? _P-I-G-S._ 7447\. Perfect. He tapped the music button. There was a search button! _V-E-R-A L-Y-N-N. Nothing?! Mabel, we are so having a talk about music-_

“What’re you looking for?” Dipper asked, as Bill aggressively keyed in _1940s._

“Word War Two.”

“... Music?”

“ _Good_ music,” Bill corrected him. “Swing, maybe?” He typed it in. She had it! He forgave Mabel’s music taste.

“Electro swing?” Dipper made a face. “If you say so.”

Bill pressed play. Okay, this was _not_ what he had in mind- Had he said _electro_ swing? This was the strangest thing he’d ever heard.

Dipper turned the radio up. “You know, this stuff’s kinda grown on me. Do you think Gideon would lend me a CD?”

“I thought you hated each other.”

“Yeah, but…” Dipper trailed off. Bill started to play around with the volume on the phone. Dipper reached forward to turn down his speakers. “I think that’s loud enough.”

 _What apps do you have?_ Bill started to look through the phone. He opened one up and its loud music began to play over the radio. He closed the app and checked out a different one. _Weekly fortune? I think I’m a Scorpio. Wait, I don’t like that one. I’ll be a Pisces. Fish. Heh. Are you listening? Hello?_

Bill turned his attention to the window. They’d turned out of town and into the trees. He rolled the window down and rolled it back up again.

“I feel sick,” he announced, and rolled it back down.

“Were you drinking?”

“Sure,” Bill said, and rolled the window back up. He reached over to press it. It stopped. He could control how closed it was! He started to roll it back down, then stopped.

“How much?”

“Dunno.”

“What’d you drink?”

“Apple juice.”

“Was it hard?”

Bill snorted. “No, it was a liquid!”

“... You know what, never mind. You can take a nap when we get home.”

“Mm.” Bill rolled the window down. “This car is really small, isn’t it?”

Dipper made a face. “No. Hey, that’s kind of windy.”

“Problem, ki _Dip?_ Per. _”_

 _Uuuuunghhhh,_ Bill though. _Uunnnnnnnngh._

 _“No calling anyone kid,”_ Mabel reminded him. _“That’s a dead giveaway.”_

_Well! Look who’s back._

_“He thinks I’m drunk. That you're me, but drunk.”_

_What? Why?_

_“You should hiccup.”_

_Right now? But I_ “can’t just do” _tha            Fuck._

Mabel made a hiccuping sound. Bill repeated it.

 _This is grossest moment_ “of” _my life._

_“Do it again, then cover your mouth, maybe?”_

Bill did, and clamped his hands over his (her) mouth.

“Are you” _happy now?_

Mabel giggled. _“Immensely.”_

Dipper gave Bill a strange look. “Did you have a good sleep last night?”

“Yes,” Bill said without moving his hands. “What’s” _he talking about why would anyone ask that what sort of a goddamn fucker would ask another goshdarn bastard what sort of a_

_“Stop swearing.”_

_No. Fuck you._

“Then what’s with the glasses? Still got bags?”

_Fuck      f uc k._

“Style,” Bill said. Dipper looked at his hands. “I bit my tongue,” Bill told him. _That’s a thing, right?_ He was suddenly very painfully aware of the tongue, sitting in his mouth. _Oh, my god, this tongue is gross and fleshy and it’s right between my teeth-_

Dipper frowned at the glasses. “You do know it’s raining outside, right?”

“Style.”

“Okay, whatever.” Dipper turned off the main road and slowed down. “And, home sweet home.”

“Cool.” Bill dropped his hands to unclip his seatbelt. “My home. _Love_ this home.”

Dipper nodded and pocketed his keys, opening the door. Bill reached for his door.

 _“Bill,”_ Mabel said. _“Bill, you can’t go inside.”_

“What?!”

Dipper looked over at him. “... What?”

Bill smiled and waved him inside. _What do you mean I can’t fuck fuck there’s a_

_“We put the barrier up. Years ago. Unicorn hair.”_

_I hate you! I hate you. I hate you so much this is such a bad night my life was going so well until today fuck you Mabel fuck you._

Bill grabbed Mabel’s backpack and phone and jumped out of the car. Christ, he was glad to be out of that car. “I’m gonna go for a walk in the woods by myself, I think,” he said. Dipper stopped at the door.

“I think that’s a bad idea, actually.”

“Nope,” Bill said. “It’s a great idea. I’m gonna go do this great idea.”

“Mabel, I really think that’s a bad idea. I mean, with- you know, circumstantially.”

Bill shook his head. “I think it’s a good idea.”

“Well, it isn’t.”

“It is.”

_“All ideas are good ideas!”_

Bill nodded. “All ideas are good ideas! All of them. I’ll be off."

“No.” Dipper started back down the stairs. “Come on, Mabel, we need to go inside-”

_What do I do what do I do what do I do_

Dipper grabbed his hand. Bill pulled it back.

“And take off the glasses,” Dipper said. “You’re seriously starting to freak me out.”

_What do I do what do I do Mabel Mabel Mabel Mabel_

Complete silence.

_Okay fine maybe he won’t notice fuck you_

Bill took off the glasses, folded them shut, and started tapping them against his collarbone.

Dipper’s face went through the most amusing range of expressions Bill had ever seen. Okay, maybe he’d noticed a little bit, but it was _hilarious_.

“Mab- it- you’ve gotta be kidding me-”

Confused. Denial. Panicky. Angry. Confused. Super confused.

He’d said “Mabel.” Maybe he thought he was just seeing things! Bill could backpedal this. He was great at tricking people, especially when they were idiots. He just needed to play it cool.

“Easy, kid, you look like you’ve seen a ghost!” Bill beamed at Dipper.

_Fuck           I said it I said ki d I       fuck I-_

Dipper jumped back. _“Bill?!”_

 _“Buh- bu-Bill?!”_ Bill repeated. “Hey, pal, long time no see. Did you miss me? I bet you did! Aw. You did. I can tell.”

Dipper groaned. “You've got to be fucking kidding me!”

“I don't kid, kid. “

“I don't have time for this right now! Can’t you go away for like, a week? Can you wait a week before you come back?”

“Oh, I'm not coming back _yet_ ,” Bill said. “So quit shaking. I'm just hanging out. Scouting the scene. That's why-”

He leaned back onto the air and fell over.

 _“Fuck_!” he screamed. Human beings couldn't do that! Dipper grabbed him by the arm and wrenched him back up.

“I don't know _how_ you're here right now,” he growled. “But I'm going to count down from three and when I'm done you had _better_ be out of Mabel’s- three- two- two and a half- _Bill-”_

“Still here!”

Dipper shrieked and dropped him, then opened his car door. He started to root around in his glove compartment and pulled out a hand puppet.

“Mabel!” he looked around, brandishing the puppet. “Here's a physical form for you! Mabel!”

“Did you… already have that?” Bill grinned. “ _Paranoid_ …”

 _“This is so embarrassing,”_ Mabel said.

“Stop waving that thing around,” Bill said. “Mabel says you're embarrassing her.”

Dipper pointed the puppet at Bill. “Shut up! Mabel!”

_“Oh, oh man.”_

Bill pinched the bridge of his nose. “Now you're embarrassing yourself.”

Dipper glared at him, and let go of the puppet. It fell onto the ground. Dipper turned to look at it.

“What did you do with Mabel?!” he demanded, scooping up the puppet and stuffing it into his jacket.

“Nothing, kid, _relax_. You kids stress so much. You're always stressed out. Stress, whenever I-”

“Stop saying ‘stress.’” Dipper folded his arms. “Alright, Cipher! I'll play along. What're you doing here? What's your game?”

“You want the skinny on it? I'm here because I made a deal,” Bill said, then shook his hands in the air. “Woah! Big surprise! Huge shock. Like the spider ducks!”

“What? Never mind. You made a deal… with _Mabel_?”

“Mabel made the deal. I just shook the hand.”

“I'm not following.”

Bill sighed. “No, of course not. _Mabel_ summoned _me_. _She_ outlined the terms. I just agreed to them.”

“I don't believe you.”

“Believe it, baby. Bill's gonna be in town for awhile. Unlike you, Mr. There's-a-scary-guy-here-time-to-leave. That's right, I'm caught up, I know the deets. I even know his name. Tolly.”

“His name is Tony.”

“Tony.” Bill nodded solemnly. “That's right. _Soo_ , Mabel said you'd buy me a plane ticket?”

“Fat chance.” Dipper folded his arms. “Take your backpack and go. Try me again when you've decided to stop possessing my _sister_.”

“But I won't need a plane ticket then. And also, it’s _her_ backpack, not yours, and she says I can keep it. Right Mabel? _Ooh,_ yes, Bill!”

Dipper glanced around at nothing in particular, clearly searching for his sister. “Don't worry, Mabel. I'll figure this out! And Bill, _don't_ touch my car.”

Dipper stomped inside. Bill immediately sat down on the hood of his car.

“I want a juice box,” Bill said.

 _“You don’t have any money,”_ Mabel said. _“_ Don’t _use my body to rob anyone. Then I’d be a criminal. And that would be_ bad, _Bill. Got that?”_

“Fine, fine.”

_“I’m going to sleep. Goodnight.”_

“Hey-”

Too late, Mabel was gone. Bill groaned and fell back onto Dipper’s windshield. What was he supposed to do now? Jog back into town? Wander around in the woods?

The woods. At least it was a start. And it would be less boring than standing in front of a house all night.

Just to double check, Bill hopped off the car and walked toward the Shack. He’d gotten pretty close, but the second he lifted his foot to start up the stairs, there was an awful tearing sensation in his chest. A bolt of pain went through his head and he fell back.

“What the _hey!”_ he screamed. “Fine! I’m leaving! I’m leaving already!”

Bill turned and stomped off into the forest.

It was still raining.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my really long now gone notes on this basically said:  
> 1\. this looks like it's gonna be a lot longer than i thought but i didn't set out to write a trilogy here... yeah... i'll just keep editing and writing and we'll see what happens. I have twenty five ish chapters so far and i'm not finished.  
> 2\. as you've probably noticed, mabel is going to be keeping to the shadows for most of this fic. as a result, there's also a little less gideon and pacifica. the bright side is more bill, more dipper, and more ford. and to top it all off, tony is on his way. not to mention, all those folks who didn't pop up in tmf are also coming, including a really important aspect of the mystery shack who'd been there from day one, who i just realized i haven't even mentioned at all in tmf and had to quickly address in this one. they'll pop up in like. chapter 24/5 ish.  
> 3\. you've also probably noticed that i'm following more than one person this time around. originally this was only going to follow dipper but i ended up wanting to follow bill too and then at some points i needed to follow other people... hopefully it makes the story less confusing, instead of m o r e. because of this, i don't go quite as in depth with character's thoughts, and also, sleep deprivation is gonna influence a lot of actions too, no one sleeps at all in this. so ideally everyone will still seem in character and if not it's my fault. on a side note, almost every aspect of bill's character in this is derived from some bit of canon i fished up, but also some weird decisions i made (according to a few minutes of research "the skinny on it" is slang from like, the 70s? so that's a weird decision i made?) and i am aiming to explore his backstory eventually.  
> 5\. i'm so happy and excited and glad to see you guys happy and excited about this. you have no idea how much it means to me. i love you all so much and every time i get comments and kudos on this strange little fic i dreamed up my heart overflows. love y'all.  
> also i just wanted to share with you i got what i'm pretty sure is a dvd of spanish children's cartoons about death? i don't speak spanish, i hope there are subtitles. plus i FINALLY have watched back to the future and who framed roger rabbit. i LOVE who framed roger rabbit. and pokemon go is my life now.
> 
> more to come, love y'all!


	3. The Return 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some people might have written a fic where dipper handles this situation really well, with a fully thought out plan. i'm not that person. but trust me, he fully intends to keep the bill thing under wraps and in his defense, he does a decent job.
> 
> i lowkey really regret writing the "kicking bill out into the woods" thing because honestly it just feels super out of character and i don't remember why i wanted it there? in hindsight the only conceivable reason was to split up the chapters so while i do acknowledge it as canon/fanon for now, i may go back and scrap it. then again, i did get... a vaping joke... out of it... why did i want this again? srry guys, i'm trying to be better about not being a super indulgent author and i'm failing big time. this isn't even indulgent? it's just weird?
> 
> buuut on the bright side: i dabble more into bill's characterization, bill gets to eat food, dipper gets to instruct bill on basic human safety and actually maybe outsmarts him a little. the finished product: this chapter

Dipper woke up to a crash and shot up in bed. He fumbled with his lamp and the lights came on. There was glass on a floor. And a rock. Someone had thrown a rock through his window?

He did the sensible thing and stuck his head through the window someone was throwing rocks at. He could see Mabel, tossing a rock back and forth.

“Mabel?” he called.

“Still me!” Bill shouted, and wound up to throw it again.

Dipper ducked. “Stop throwing rocks!” The rock hit the wall with an audible _thump_. “I’m coming down, okay?!”

Dipper pulled on a hoodie and some pants and hurried down the stairs. He threw open the back door and jogged across the lawn. Bill was getting ready throw another rock.

He slowed down. “Bill!”

Bill dropped the rock. “Good, you’re here! Took you long enough. My stomach is empty and we’re having issues working it out.”

“What?” Dipper looked Bill up and down. “It’s been like, two days. Have you not eaten?”

“I’ve eaten plenty,” Bill snapped. His stomach immediately growled.

Dipper groaned. “Oh my god, I can’t believe this is happening. Have you at least had something to drink?”

“Yeah,” Bill said bitingly. “I had a nice long drink from the _river._ ”

“... Did you?”

“Oh, yeah Dipper, I looked at the river and it was like, sure there are _rocks_ in it and animals perform their bodily functions here, but I’m _sure_ it’s fine.”

Dipper bit back a second groan. “Can you take the glasses off?”

“I don’t _wanna._ ”

“I’ll feed you if you do.”

Bill pulled off the glasses and started to fiddle with the lenses. Dipper studied Mabel’s face.

“Man, have you even slept?”

Bill popped out one of the lenses. His face lit up.

“Did you see that? Did you _see_ that? I wrecked it! I’m gonna do the other one!”

Dipper grabbed the sunglasses from Bill. “What have you been doing the past two days?”

“I thought you’d _never_ ask! I went for a really lovely walk, actually.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Met some very charming woodland creatures. Even trained a squirrel! Then the bodily functions started happening after a while so I went fishing, but then some kids came by with their fancy millennial cigarettes-”

“ _Nevermind_ , I don’t want to hear it. Just wait here for a second, I’ll go get you some food. Stay. _Put._ ” Dipper dashed back inside and opened up the fridge. Mabel had done most of the cooking over the summer, but he’d started to make more of the meals after the Tony incident. He didn’t want to wait for over a minute and risk Bill running off with Mabel’s body again. It had taken all of two minutes for Dipper to realize telling him to leave with the stupidest. Idea. Ever. But by then, Bill had disappeared into the woods.

Dipper grabbed a box of cornflakes, a bowl, and a spoon, and headed outside. Bill was sitting on the hood of his car.

“Get off my car.”

“No.”

Dipper shook the box. “I brought you food.”

“ _Fine._ ” Bill slid off Lisa’s hood, and Dipper poured him a bowl of cornflakes.

“Can you turn around for a second?”

Bill stomped his foot angrily, but turned around. He was still wearing Mabel’s backpack. Dipper sat down on the steps of the Shack and felt around the porch. He found a thin line of unicorn hair and dug his fingernail into it. There was an audible _pop_ , but Bill didn’t seem to notice.

“Okay,” Dipper said. Bill turned, and Dipper patted the steps. “You can sit down.” Bill looked down at the seat, then back at Dipper. “You can sit _down_ , Bill. You do know what sitting is, right?”

Bill muttered something under his breath and approached Dipper. He collapsed onto the seat next to him, grabbed the bowl, and started to spoon corn flakes into his mouth.

“You have to chew,” Dipper told him.

“Fuck you,” Bill said, spewing corn flakes.

“You’ll choke if you don’t.”

“Fuck you,” Bill repeated, and shoved another spoonful into his mouth. He chewed with his mouth open. It was _gross,_ but at least Dipper was used to watching Mabel do it and this was _technically_ the same thing.

“Okay,” Dipper said. “So, here’s the deal. You clearly have no idea how a human body functions.”

“Fhaf’s nof frue!” Bill slammed down his spoon, then swallowed. “I know _all_ about how human bodies function! I just-”

“Whatever, dude. Save it. There’s also a crazy ripped demon in town who’s probably looking for Mabel, and he doesn’t know about this situation. Which leads me to my last point, I am _not_ letting you fuck up my sister’s body, which you clearly have been doing. So do you want to come inside and take a nap or what?”

Bill glared at him. “Or what.”

“Seriously?”

“Fine, kid, I’ll play along. Do I get a bed?”

“We’ve got a couch you can take.”

“Mabel says she has a bed.”

“Yeah, but-”

“So I’ll stay in her room, there you go. The great allegiance is formed! It’s really cold out here and I have thirty-five mosquito bites. Let’s go inside.”

“Hang on-”

Bill stood up and started inside. Dipper grabbed the bowl and the corn flakes and followed him.

“There’s a rule,” Dipper said.

“What? Seriously?”

“Actually, there are several rules. But the most important rule is that you cannot, and I mean _cannot_ let Great Uncle Ford know you’re here. If he sees you, you have to _totally_ convince him you’re Mabel.”

Bill tapped his chin thoughtfully. “Trick the old man? I’m in! You know, I’m actually really good at that. This one time-”

“I know, the portal, he put a metal plate in his head, Weirdmageddon. So you promise that you won’t let him find out about your deal with Mabel, or anything?”

“Pinkie swear!” Bill grinned. “Race you to my room!”

He made a dash for the stairs and climbed them two at a time. Dipper went to get fill up a water bottle, and stuck some pasta in the microwave. He looked over his shoulder to make sure Bill hadn’t snuck back down, then grabbed some glue from Stan’s old Emergency Drawer, headed out the door, and crouched down by the unicorn hair. He swabbed some of the glue over it and reattached the unicorn hair. For a moment, the sky around the Shack seemed to glow, and Dipper could make out shapes, then the color vanished and it was nighttime again. He headed back inside, returned the glue to its place, and carried the water bottle and pasta up the stairs. Bill was sprawled out on Mabel’s floor, snoring.

Dipper kicked him. “Wake up.”

Bill snored louder.

“Okay, now I _know_ you’re awake. I got you some water and food.”

Bill opened one eye. “What kind of food?”

“Pasta.”

“I only like corn flakes and chips, and also apple pie.”

“Well, too bad, there’s this thing called the food pyramid. You like pyramids, right?”

“Stop generalizing me.”

“Corn is great and all, and it’s definitely in most of the food in America, but you still have to eat other stuff. This pasta has bacon in it. Mabel doesn’t like bacon, but she eats a lot of eggs, and I’m really bad at making eggs. So, you have to eat bacon.”

Bill closed his eyes. “Mabel says you can’t trick her into eating bacon.”

“Mabel says- I’m not _tricking_ her into eating bacon! I’m making _you_ eat bacon! Plus, there’s also cauliflower, mushrooms, and cheese and stuff! And besides, you can just eat around it!”

“Mabel says _fine._ ” Bill sat up and took the pasta. “Is that apple juice?”

“No, it’s water, which is something _else_ humans need to survive.”

“I know what water is.” Bill snatched the bottle from him.

“Also,” Dipper said. “A few more things. You know how to use the bathroom, right?”

Bill gave him a funny look.

“What? You do, right?”

“Your sister’s screaming at you,” Bill said. “Believe me, I agree, kid. The guy’s an idiot _and_ an embarrassment.” Bill paused, then started to laugh.

“Okay,” Dipper said. “Is that a yes? And stop talking about Mabel. Mabel can talk for herself.”

Bill gave him another funny look, then sniggered.

“What’s so funny?”

“You’re kidding, right? I’m gonna keep this going until I’ve got no other options. You not knowing stuff is _funny._ ” Bill took a swig from the water bottle without taking the lid off.

“You have to-”

“I know how to drink water!” Bill ripped the lid off and had a long drink, then started coughing.

“Wrong pipe,” Dipper told him. “And you have to drink water with intervals for breathing.”

Bill wiped his mouth, still coughing. “I knew that. That’s why humans are _stupid._ ”

“Follow up question, do you know about bathing? Have you ever, like, showered, before?”

“I think I’m capable of _showering,_ ” Bill said.

“It’s surprisingly hard. Also, don’t open your eyes when there’s soap on you, just a heads up.”

Bill was laughing at something else now. Something was clearly going on with him and Mabel, and it was really pissing Dipper off. Why wouldn’t she talk to him? There were at least ten stuffed animals in the room that she could easily possess. Was she mad at him? Was Bill holding her captive? Why was she telling him jokes? What if she wasn’t even _here_ , and something had happened to her _?_

Dipper looked down at the backpack, and reached for it. Bill stopped laughing and batted his hand away.

“Hey- _ow!”_

Bill grabbed the backpack, dropping the water bottle. It spilled onto the ground. Dipper sighed and snatched it back up. “We just fixed these floors. Hang on, I’ll get a towel.”

“This is _my_ backpack,” Bill said. _“You_ don’t get to touch it, got that? Because it’s _mine,_ and stupid humans don’t get to touch my stuff.”

“It’s not yours,” Dipper yelled from the bathroom. “It’s _Mabel’s._ Also, she took some of my stuff, so I should get that back.”

“Fine!” Dipper heard thumps, and returned with a towel. Bill was furiously removing books from the backpack, and dropping them in a pile on the ground. “Take your dumb human books! They’re dumb and I don’t want them. Dumb!”

Dipper threw the towel at him, and Bill nearly fell over.

“Clean up the water and get some fucking sleep,” Dipper told him. “Breakfast is at nine, and you better be up, because I’m not gonna make food again until lunch. After lunch I’m gonna teach you how all the electrical appliances work and which rooms you’re allowed in, and make sure you know how not to accidentally kill yourself by like, sticking your hand in an outlet or anything. Do _not_ stick your hand in any outlets. Or forks. We’ll finish with the rules and the TV, then you can watch TV until dinner time.”

“But TV’s stupid,” Bill said. “Can’t I learn how to drive a car? I already know how. That’d be fun.”

“No,” Dipper said. “Now finish your pasta and sleep. And _clean up the water you spilled._ You know where the bathroom is, right? Good. Don’t go in any rooms except here and the bathroom until I say you can. Good _night.”_

Dipper grabbed his books off the floor and stomped out of the room to put them away. He was tempted to barricade Bill into the room, but if he needed to use the bathroom during the night, they'd both be fucked.

He snapped his fingers- a bell. Dipper headed down into the gift shop. He'd taken the bell off the door to be replaced, but it was still working. He brought it back upstairs and set it directly in front of the door. If Bill got up, he'd hear.

Dipper headed into his room. It was well past three.

 _Great,_ he thought, and collapsed into bed. Now that the situation was starting to sink in, Dipper was feeling even worse. Bill was in his _house_. At least he knew where Mabel’s body was, but her actual presence seemed to be either locked in some dungeon or having a lovely vacation. And strangest of all, Bill was acting like he could talk to her, even though she'd said _nothing_ to him.

 _I don't think I'll be sleeping that well tonight,_ Dipper thought, and pulled one of his books out. He sat up in bed and started at the very beginning.

Dipper woke up to the television blaring. He must have passed out around five, and now it was seven. He dressed  quickly, and started down the stairs.

He walked into the living room and nearly groaned. “Bill, what the fuck,” Dipper said, going to turn the volume down.

“I’ve decided I don’t like sleeping!” Bill crossed his legs, and leaned back onto the couch. “I tried real hard, for like. For ages. Then I got up and figured out the TV! Turn it back up, kid.”

“No, you’ll wake up the entire town with it this loud. Plus, you’ll kill your eardrums. What are you even watching?”

“Right now, I’m watching this great cooking show,” Bill grinned. “It’s called Metal Kitchen of Fury. This British man is making people cry. It’s really funny.”

“You’re watching the food channel?” Dipper had liked that show. Until this exact moment. “Do you even know how to cook?”

“Don’t sell me short, kid. I’ll have you know that I can cook a meal with only a rabbit.”

“... Is the meal just a dead rabbit?”

“Sometimes. So, have you made me breakfast yet? I’m starving.”

Dipper shook his head. “No, I haven’t made breakfast yet, because I just got up. Also, you’re gonna have to learn how to cook for yourself, because I’m not your slave.”

“You’re not?”

“ _No._ Anyway, I told you breakfast is at nine, and it’s eight. You didn’t sleep at all?”

Bill waved him off. “I’ll just sleep tonight.”

“Do you want like, sleeping meds or something? I can give you some.”

Bill folded his arms. “Mabel doesn’t like sleeping either.”

“Yeah, but Mabel has a _reason_ for not liking sleep. You’re not Mabel, and also, sleep deprivation sucks.”

“I know, right?” Bill nodded. “You get all paranoid and itchy, and then these demons show up and you totally buy their bullcrap. That’s how I got _you!_ ” Bill pointed a finger gun at Dipper. _“Pew!_ Remember that? Laptop? _”_

“Yeah, I remember. I’ll see if I can get you some Mabel juice,” Dipper said. “That’ll keep you awake until tonight, then you’ll have a good crash. I can give you some meds then, too.”

Bill stuck out his tongue. Dipper sighed and headed into the kitchen. He stuck some waffles in the toaster, and some quick bacon into the oven. It was all ready within five minutes. Dipper looked around in the fridge, and found Mabel’s pitcher of juice. He and Ford didn’t really drink it, but she was a huge fan. Though, he realized, Bill on Mabel Juice was probably a really bad idea. He pushed the pitcher to the bad of the fridge.

“Breakfast!” Dipper yelled. Bill appeared in the door a moment later and sat down at the kitchen table. Dipper handed him a plate.

“ _Look_ at this presentation!” Bill picked up a limp waffle. “Wrong texture. No wonder your restaurant is failing.”

“This isn’t a restaurant,” Dipper snapped. “You haven't even eaten it! Stop criticizing your food or I’ll have to get rid of it, _and_ the food channel.”

Bill rolled his eyes and stuck the waffle in his mouth. Dipper grabbed some silverware.

“Okay,” Dipper said. “This is a fork, and a knife. They are for cutting your food with, and ferrying the food to your mouth.”

“I knowf whaf silferfare is,” Bill said around the waffle.

“They are _not_ for stabbing yourself, putting in your eyeballs, or poking into your or anyone else’s arms. And definitely always _not_ for electrical outlets. Got that?”

“Noff for staffing,” Bill spat out the waffle, and it landed sadly on his plate. “This doesn’t fit.”

“Yeah,” Dipper said. “You either cut off bites, or bite them off yourself. You don’t just stick food into your mouth and swallow.”

Bill picked the waffle back up and looked at it apprehensively, then tore off a bite with his teeth and chewed.

“Fine,” he said. “That does work better. I’ll give you that one.”

“Maybe try to get a nap before lunch,” Dipper suggested. “I’ll give you your tour afterward. Until then, don’t go into any rooms except here, Mabel’s room, and the living room.”

“Can I go in the gift shop?”

“Only if you don’t touch anything. _Anything._ Except… maybe the floor. Maybe.”

Bill nodded. He’d decided that he was going to touch _everything_.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1.writing a fic where bill interacts with people on a daily basis was probably a bad idea???? bill has no self control. i have very little, and writing a character with no self control in combination with my lack of it, makes for a lot of weird stuff (like food network references ((hell's kitchen AND iron chef??!)) but that's not as good as the really obscure funny tumblr post ref i've got planned for later in this fic) and to top it all of, bill's a LOT like me in that there's a constant failure to take anything seriously... yeah. end result? dipper makes bill a waffle. i spent a lot of time reworking that food network joke between flights in new york a few weeks back, so i hope u like it!  
> 2\. i just played a gravity falls dating sim it was terrible and i i loved it 10/10 would recommend i got every single ending, my favorite was the bill is soos's dad reveal.  
> 4\. i wrote most of the first half of this fic at 12-1 am during the last semester, so... y e a h. longer, more reader-worthy cuts will definitely make an appearance in some kind of deleted scenes fic (that was the only way i could convince myself to delete the one where they all go to the beach... bill got to wear a yellow sundress... not a couple fiddauthor went monster hunting... there was almost a stan gideon reunion except i didn't write it... bill got to hold a bug and named the bug frederick)  
> 5\. so in writing that note i just realized that since mabel isn't around as much in this fic i've attached myself to bill and am now projecting on him in weird ways, like making him hold and name a bug... more to come on this breaking story  
> ANOTHER NOTE: as if this weren't long enough, at 2 am last night/this morning i was trying to write on this and I realized... there's no conceivable way I can fit in everything I want in this fic so... it's looking like a trilogy. and, uh, also, that's not including the holiday special i want to write and the deleted scenes fic.  
> (yeah. I'm going to probably write a bonus thing where mabel makes a holiday dinner and everyone packs into the shack over winter break. yeah.)


	4. Snapshots

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the most important thing i can tell u about this chapter is: i formatted it a bunch in its doc, and i really really hope that carries over onto ao3. if you're reading off mobile, it might miss one or two of my little details! another important thing i wanted to mention: when mabel "speaks"- italics in quotes- the only one who can hear her is Bill.
> 
> this was probably one of my favorite chapter to write, except maybe for a scene planned for chapter eighteen. i kind of stray from my typical writing style a bit in this update, and i hope you all enjoy reading it as much as i did creating it!
> 
> also: i'll be putting up a "deleted scenes" fic real soon!

Bill was having a dream.

He was falling down. He was falling far. Mabel was in front of him. It was dark. Mabel was reaching for him. She was trying to grab his hands. Bill was trying to take ahold of hers so she would just stop _screaming_ but they were falling so fast and spinning and she was getting further and further away, and then she pulled her hands back and she was falling faster and faster and spinning away from him and

Bill was not falling anymore.

He should never have been falling in the first place.

He could fly.

* * *

 

A week in the Mystery Shack: the AC breaks a lot. Bill doesn’t like sweating and he has dreams that wake him up. There is nothing he hates more than lying awake, waiting for the sleep to come. And Mabel saying _“You’re not supposed to talk Bill”_ and _“Well, I’m going to bed, Bill”_ and _“stop standing up, Bill!”_

He hates the silence in the room, and leaves the fan on to block it out, but when the fan is broken, _that_ keeps him awake, or else it spins until the room is freezing, but he _has_ to leave it on, because the quiet is so _loud._ Louder, even be, than the broken fan.

He hates staring up at the ceiling, until he can see it through the dark.

He hates dreaming. He wakes up and doesn’t realize what’s just happened. He slept, in a way, for years. He drifted in and out of consciousness in that stone. But this. This sleep is a knowledge that he doesn't have. Dreams are strange and they catch you up, they tangle you, and he can't tell when something is a dream until he wakes up, sees Mabel’s hands as his, realizes that he was asleep.

Sometimes he can't remember dreams.

That's what he really hates.

* * *

 

Bill kind of likes Mabel’s room. He likes the sock puppet on her desk and the piles of papers and half-opened boxes. He like that all her stuff is half unpacked, that she’d half moved in.

He really doesn’t like the ceiling.

The only natural light comes in through the window.

And it gets so hot and stuffy some nights.

And sometimes he closes the door, and he’s stuck in there.

* * *

 

“My room is too small,” Bill complains, sticking another bite of eggs into his mouth.

“I don’t even know what that’s supposed to mean.” Dipper starts to butter his toast.

“It means it’s too _small._ ”

“What do you want me to do? Smash the walls? I’m not gonna smash the walls.”

“I don’t know! It’s just too small.”

“Then go into the living room or something. Just don’t go downstairs.”

“Your whole house is really tiny,” Bill whines. “I hate it. It’s terrible.”

“Yeah, whatever. That’s not really my problem.”

“Hmmph.”

There's a part of his mind that is supposed to be open. Bill dives into it and asks:

“Are you there?”            “Hello?”                “Can you hear me?”

And Mabel always answers:

_“I'm here!”                    “Hi!”                     “I hear you!”_

He knows she will be angry if he tells her what he is thinking:

_I wasn't talking to you._

It is just him and Mabel.

In one body.

It is just Mabel and him in one single-

* * *

 

Dipper gets used to hearing the television blaring when he wakes up. Sometimes it’s the volume that drags him out of bed. He goes down to use the bathroom one morning and finds Bill curled up on the couch, snoring loudly. The climax of a spy movie is playing on the television. Dipper turns it off.

* * *

 

Bill wakes up and starts to breathe. He keeps forgetting to breathe. He has to _stop_ forgetting to breathe. Wait, now he has to breathe again-

_He keeps forgetting to blink, too-_

* * *

 

After three days Bill begins to feel claustrophobic. He has inhabited a body for long stretches of time, but never for so long without a _purpose._ No one he was looking for is answering his calls and he doesn't exactly have access to a landline that Dipper doesn’t know about.

(you can only make cross dimensional calls with your brain or with a landline)

It is just him. He has spent the last few months with only Mabel to talk to but now it is just him and her for what feels like ages in one. Single. Body. They are _one. Single. Mind._ He doesn't understand it and he detests it. He likes her plenty. He cannot take _being_ her.

Bill hates confined spaces, and being trapped, and that's how he is starting to feel.

He is in a small space.

He is getting squeezed.

He is becoming flat.

He wakes up in the middle of a dream that is is being pressed down like an orange into juice and becoming two dimensional, liquid, cold and wet and shaking and _almost_ screaming and is weak enough to think

 _Let me out let me out let me out OUT OUT OUT OUT OUT_ OUT OUT OUT OUT OUT

He tries to leave and Mabel grabs his hand

_You promised you promised_

_Let me out let me out_

_You shook my hand_

_Let me out let me out_

_I don't know what I'll do please_

_I don't know what I'm doing_

_Please please_

_I hate this I hate you_

_I'll give you anything just_

_You can't make me_

_stay here_

_You promised you shook my hand please I don't want to be alone_

_I'm alone_

_I don't want to be_

_I don't want to be here I don't want to be here I don't_

_Know what to do I don't know what to do please stay please please_

_I can't do this anymore_

_I can’t do this anymore_

_icantdothisanymoreicanticant_

_I CANNOT DO THIS ANYMORE_

 

Bill looks down at hands that are not his and makes them move.

He turns them over and back again.

He lifts them up to his shoulder and holds them over himself as his chest heaves.

 _“It's like I'm hugging you,”_ Mabel smiles. _“It's like you're hugging me.”_

“No,” Bill says coldly. “It is not like that at all.”

* * *

 

“Bill, I’m serious,” Dipper said. “Humans blink both their eyes at the _same time._ Can you _stop_ blinking them one at a time? It’s _really_ creepy. Stop laughing. Bill, I’m serious. Stop it. Bill.”

* * *

 

Bill goes out onto the porch because he has been inside a house for _ages_ and he doesn't even normally _live in a house what is he doing here_ and decides that if he can't leave Mabel, he is going to leave with her.

 _Let's run away and start a circus,_ is his suggestion. _I'll be the ringmaster, because I dress better. You can be a clown. You can be a clown and a pony girl._

_“Can I be co-ringmaster?”_

_That's not an actual position! Yes! Yes!_

_“You could also be a magician! You can saw me in half! Don't actually do that unless you can fix it.”_

_I'll fix it when you're dead!_

_“That doesn't count! Where are we going?”_

_Russia. It's far away and I hear the weather’s great._

_“I don't speak Russian. Should I learn?”_

_That's our schtick! We're an American circus! Why would Americans speak Russian? Besides, I speak enough for both of us._

_“Wait, you're American?”_

_Guess I’m kind of an immigrant._

_“From like, hell?”_

_Close._

_“Can we have animals?”_

_Kid, listen closely: we are going to have every single animal, ever_.

Mabel cheers.

Bill is feeling pretty okay when he opens up the front door, crosses the porch, and starts for the stairs-

And there is something being ripped up inside him and he _is thrown back_.

_No no no no_

* * *

“You _asshole,”_ Bill says, lying on the porch.

Dipper glances down. He isn't wearing a shirt, just his binder, an open jacket, and some ratty sweatpants. He looks like he just woke up. He also looks as if he has won a long battle.

He grins. “That's right,” he tells Bill, _smug,_ “You’re stuck here. I put the barrier back up. _I_ trapped _you_.”

_Trapped trapped trapped_

* * *

 

Dipper is fixing the wall that Bill punched when he realized he was stuck and Bill is not helping and watching television (he has watched _so_ much television) when Ford suddenly appears, for the first time in his entire stay, in a doorway. Bill remembers that he's supposed to be tricking him, which is _finally, some good news,_ but doesn’t have any sunglasses on him, so he immediately lays down and pretends to be napping. Bill would _never_ nap. Napping is something for idiots who like sleep. Bill doesn’t like sleep. He likes the night sky, and coffee of the same color.

“Afternoon Dipper, Mabel,” Ford calls. Dipper removes his ear protection and sets down his power tools, but leaves his goggles on.

“Afternoon, Great Uncle Ford!”

Bill keeps his eyes shut.

“I’ll be heading out.”

“Out?” Dipper asks. Bill hears the door open. He cracks open an eye.

“Yes,” Ford says matter-of-factly. “I think I’ll walk into town. It’s been too long since I’ve had some good old fashioned pie at Greasy’s. No offense to yours, Mabel. Your chocolate pie is the best I’ve tasted. I’m just in mood for raspberry.”

Bill blinks.

 _“Me,”_ Mabel tells him.

_Okay Okay. Okay._

_She_ laughs _._

It is the strangest sound Bill has ever heard. There are bells coming from the mouth _he_ has been using and getting so used to except _he isn’t making the bells._

“Thanks, Great Uncle Ford!”

Bill hears Dipper drop a piece of wood and cuss under his breath.

Ford ruffles her hair. He’s _touching_ Bill’s hair but it’s _not_ Bill’s hair and now he’s talking to him- “Though I _do_ prefer snickerdoodles.”

“I’ll keep that in mind!”

Bill is still pretending to be napping. Honestly, he doesn’t know if his eyes are even open.

Dipper starts fixing the wall again. “Stay safe, Great Uncle Ford. Are you sure you’re up for the walk?”

“It’s long overdue. I’ll be back sometime after dinner, no need to wait up.”

The door closes. There is a moment of silence.

“Bill?” Dipper asks.

“Yeah?”

He doesn’t say anything.

 _Nailed it,_ Mabel says.

* * *

 

_(It's funny...)_

_Until then_

_Until then_

_Until then_

_(This is getting easy...)_

_-        “International Rock Star” Stars_

* * *

 

For the first time, Ford is out of the house and out of the basement for an extended period of time. This is not something that occurs to Dipper.

Bill knows this, because Dipper decides _now_ is the best time to work on his TV show, and whenever he decides to write, he locks Bill out of the Shack because _what_ can Bill do on the _porch_?

The answer is: Bill does not like eating a _lot_ and also he has a hammer and a crowbar he found in one of their closets in case the porch is too small and honestly the house is a _wreck_ and Mabel’s asleep anyway, so-

Bill finds the part of the porch with the hole, the really rotten part, and the plank next to it is really loose, so he bends it up and crawls under the porch, then lowers it down after him. Thanks, Ford, for building the house on stilts, because there’s enough space for Bill to make his way to the edge of the house and just kind of… pushes.

See, there’s enough space under the house to get into the basement. And he _knows_ because sometimes stuff gets dropped off the porch or tossed through the yard and rolls away and goes downstairs for good or until Ford brings it upstairs. He double checked on his first day by throwing a ball down because he suspected it’d be hard to get past the vending machine, and Ford brought it back up frowning and telling Mabel to be more responsible and Bill had nodded and smiled. So Bill pulls himself under the house, which is _almost_ a tight squeeze but not quite, and finds the way to downstairs, which is a _vent_ , but nothing important is ever that easy, so. He worms his way in and the vent is _awful_ and it’s _terrible_ and it’s _tight_ and he’s _suffocating_ and he’s _dying_ but he slides down and falls into Ford’s control room.

Bill dusts off the worst of the plaster, dirt, assorted cobwebs, and rust, then forces himself to stand up. His wrists hurt from trying to catch himself when he landed, and his legs are stinging and a little numb. It’s fantastic. He can barely breathe.

He checks the security cameras. Dipper is in his room, hunched over his computer, and the curtains are drawn. Bill grins and looks through the window. The portal is a skeleton, but it’s _there._ There’s a photo of Dipper and Mabel on the desk. Bill sticks it in his sweater. He turns to the nearest computer and presses the spacebar. A login screen appears. Ford’s username is already entered, but the password is an empty box still.

He remembers it being “billportal” (his idea), so he types that in. No, that’s wrong. Right, he changed it! “BETRAYAL” or something. Wait, he changed it again? Bill tries Ford’s birthday. Wrong. He tries his star sign. Wrong. Bill scowls. Ford probably picked something he thought no one would guess.

What would Ford think Bill couldn’t guess? “Billisgreat.” Wrong. “IloveBill.” _Wrong._ “Iamgay.” Still wrong. “Isuck?” Nope. So maybe it was something Ford really cared about? “Anomalies.” Nah. “Family.” Nada. “Mystupidfamily.” Zip. “Stanley.” Nothing. “Dipper.” No. “Mabel.” Nothing. “Twins.” Still nothing. “Kids.” “Shack.” “Mylife.” “Personalhealth.” “Fiddleford.” “Science.” “Math.” Why was this so _hard?_

Bill picked a pencil up from the desk and tapped it against his chin, then began to chew the eraser thoughtfully. There was a chance it was just a string of numbers and/or letters, of _any_ length. And if Bill remembered correctly, which he did, there was a limited amount of failed entries possible per day. And if he exceeded that number, Ford would be alerted next time he turned the computer on. Judging by the dusty keyboard, he probably wouldn’t be down here anytime soon, but it was still a risk. By Bill’s calculations, he had around thirty tries left.

“666.” _No._ “Sixsixsix.” No! Why was this so hard?

He’d had little interaction with Ford since his move in, aside from the lecture about the ball and Mabel’s recent conversation with him. So what did he know about Ford from those conversations?

“Bemoreresponsible.” Right, like it would be _that._

He liked pie?

“Pie.” And- nothing. Raspberry pie, perhaps? No, that got nothing either. Staying inside all day? What else? Bill narrowed his eyes. “Snickerdoodles.”

He was in. Man, Ford was a _dork._

Bill pulled up the cameras. His first order of business was to alter any visual record of his presence, so he made sure anyone that checked the cameras would see an empty room. And that he’d be sitting on the porch for… maybe an hour? Then he did a folder check, and hit the jackpot. He’d forgotten how great Ford was. Not only was he an idiot and a sucker, but he was still clingy and thorough. And woe be unto him if he lost something like _the design for the portal_. Even better, he’d kept a careful log of his dismantling process. Fighting back laughter, Bill hit print, and the log came spitting out of the printer. He found the blueprints where they always were, behind the waste basket, and hopped up to head on over. He pushed through the door, papers in hand, and grinned at the portal.

Then he frowned. It was really, really big. He hadn’t _built_ the portal last time, and the idea of flinging himself around with power tools and getting greasy and doing physical labor and stuff was… unappealing. Actually, it sounded _gross_. But the only people in the house were Dipper and Ford, and he couldn’t leave to find anyone else, plus Mabel had forbidden him from doing anything that could hurt her friends and using power tools to could do that. So the physical labor, for now, would have to fall to him.

He checked the log. Apparently the last thing Ford had done was remove a huge sheet of metal. Bill looked around. There was a sheet of metal on the ground. He bent over to pick it up. It was really sharp. He pulled. And really heavy. Bill dropped it. His hands were red. Okay, fine. He squatted down and tried again. This time he got it up, and dragged it toward the portal before dropping it.

He felt Mabel beginning to stir.

_Fucking-_

Bill slammed his hands over his eyes and dropped onto the ground. _I’m asleep,_ he thought. _I’m so asleep right now._ No, sleeping didn’t sound like that. A dream! What was a good dream to have that would convince her he was asleep? _Got it._

 _Hello, beautiful circle,_ Bill thought. _I’m so glad you invited me to your beach party. Do you want to… do some math with me? Haha, you’re so funny, uh- um- circle. Oh, look at that nice square-_

Mabel went back to sleep. Bill sighed. Welp, _that_ had been weird. But it had definitely done the trick.

Bill bit his lip and looked up at the portal. Apparently, physical labor was harder than he thought.

He returned to the office and sat down at the computer. Bill stuck out his tongue and opened up the portal’s programming.

Well, the lights still worked.

Bill bit his tongue harder and pressed some more buttons. Apparently, all that worked were the cool lights he’d insisted on. Well, at least they _still_ looked cool.

Maybe he should quit while he was ahead. There had to be an easier way to do this.

* * *

 

Bill is drinking sparkling cider on the porch. Mabel is taking a break from being conscious and his breathing is even. His anger is warm and comforting, but it had been boiling that morning, so he had broke two cups and threatened Dipper with the knife he found in the kitchen until Dipper pulled a bat out from under the sofa. Now Bill knew he had a bat under the sofa. Today is a good day. His cider is pretty nice. It's crisp on his tongue and he likes the way the bubbles burn. It's been a long time since he drank something that bubbled.

He hears a car pull up next to him and his eyelids feel a little dry, like sunlight. He's feeling okay. He's not thinking about his situation.

“Mabel?”

Bill looks up. There is a man. He has glasses on. A polo shirt. Soft skin, shaven.

“Hey,” Bill says, and there is silence.

The man laughs. “Sorry, you probably don’t remember. I’m Jared Palm, we had Statistics junior year? High school? You said this place was pretty swell, I always thought I'd drive by if I was in the area. I've been hoping I'd run into you.”

“Is that so?” Bill asked.

“Yeah. Is Dipper in?”

“Why do you ask?”

“You two are inseparable.”

“Sure are. Are you looking to talk to him?”

“Nah, I'm just wondering.”

“This place isn't open.”

“I know. Can I come inside?”

“It's not my place to say.”

“Want to go grab a bite?”

“No thanks.”

He reaches for Bill’s hand and pulls him forward. Bill’s hand bounces off the barrier so violently that he almost knocks his own cider away.

“Yeesh,” Jared says. “Okay.”

“You can wait for Dipper inside, if you want,” Bill offers.

The man rolls his eyes. “No thanks.”

* * *

 

 _And then he said “I’ll be back for you guys.” That's weird, right?_ Bill rolls over on top of the blankets.

Mabel is strangely silent.

_Right?_

_“I never took Stats.”_

* * *

 

So maybe Ford had a rift? Some equivalent of a rift? Hopefully enclosed somewhere breakable?

The best place to look for the rift was, Bill decided, Ford’s office. Luckily, Dipper didn’t lock him outside of the house when Ford went off again. He put on some sunglasses and snuck past the door behind the vending machine except _then-_

It swung shut.

He went through all of Ford’s office and nothing. No rift.

The _portal_ but it was too dead to do anything.

So he went back up the stairs in the tight, dark hallway, and pushed on the door and

_nothing happened_

so he tried again and

_nothing happened_

and now he was beating his hands against the wall but not shouting, he is being _suffocated_ he is being _buried alive_ he looks around and races into Ford’s office and tears the first piece of paper he finds into three pieces then he runs up to the door and tries to push and Mabel is awake now and telling him to stay calm but Bill is _never never eve_ r calm and he is hitting the back of the door as hard as he can and he is trapped and stuck and flat and it's driving him crazy and Mabel says to pull her sweater over his head but that only makes the space smaller and he can't breathe is it normal for breath not to work and his lungs are being sucked dry and it's cold and he is stuck here he is going to be stuck here and

 

* * *

 

Dipper finds Bill with his nails starting to tear and his hands strangely red. He is spread out over several staircases with one knee pulled up under his chest, and he is tapping and sort of scratching the wall, a drumbeat as soft as dripping water.

When he opens the door Bill keeps tapping for a minute before he pulls his face up from the first step. His cheeks are shining. His eyes are red.

“There you are,” Dipper says. He offers him his hand and Bill makes a sound Dipper would not have expected. His voice sounds raw.

Bill does not take his hand.

“Did you lock yourself in?”

Bill nods.

Dipper can either close the door or help him. He sits down. There is silence for a moment.

“Can I see your phone?” Bill asks.

Dipper pulls out his phone. “What for?”

“Can you play some really bad music or something?”

Dipper plays the worst song he can think of. _Straight Blanchin’._ Bill groans. The entire song plays. Dipper will have to spend the whole day getting it out of his head. _Nice revenge, Bill._

“Maybe,” Dipper says tentatively. “You shouldn’t go downstairs. I, uh, I don’t really think you should go downstairs.”

Bill grunts. The song starts to play again.

“What are _you_ scared of?” Bill asks.

Dipper shrugs. “I don't know. Instability? Oh, Bad ratings. I really don’t like public presentations. Those magic eight balls that answer your questions. Turbulence on airplanes. I'm not super into… um… Lambs.” Bill snorted. “Losing people, I guess, but you could probably get that one. Uh, the dark is scary. Oh, man, Gideon’s hair is pretty scary. Um, let me think. There’s more.”

“You also probably don't like it when people touch your hair.”

Dipper’s hands instantly went up to his hair. “I'm okay when I touch it.”

“Almost no one in your family is okay with their hair being touched.”

“Cool, it's genetic. What about you?”

_“Me?”_

“You know, what aren’t you into?”

Bill pushed himself up off the stairs, so he was sitting down. He pushed Mabel’s hair out of his face- it was stuck- and discreetly touched her cheek. It was wet.

“I have this thing about super enclosed spaces,” Bill said. “It's not a big deal. I just don't like them. You live in a world that has a lot of... constraints. Your dimension is _tiny_. It is too small for anything that's actually big. I would know. I've seen ones that are _big_. I come from one that’s even smaller.”

“What do you mean?” Dipper asked.

“It's flat.”

“What the heck does that mean?”

“Two dimensional.”

“Like, a flat shape?”

“Imagine your world, but two dimensions only. No 3D. No time-space. Plus it's smaller.”

“How small?”

“I don't know. Pretty small.”

“You don't know?”

“I know. I’m not gonna tell you.”

_Too small-_

“How'd you get out?”

Bill cracked his knuckles. “You could say I liberated it.”

“Does it still exist?”

“... Don’t know. Not gonna tell you.”

“Alright, I guess.” Dipper frowned. “Why’d you ask?”

“I'm plotting revenge.”

“Man, I'm never cooking you dinner again.”

“Will you let me use your landline?”

“Sure.”

Bill stood up. “Come on.”

* * *

 

“Interdimensional phone calls?” Dipper asked. Bill nodded. He was perched on the gift shop counter, swinging his legs back and forth. “That sounds fake.”

“Well, it’s _not._ ”

“Well, I don’t really think you calling your dimension-wrecking friends is a good idea.”

“You think it’s fake, what do you want me to do to prove it? ‘Hi, is this a dimension where Dipper can get a date?’”

“You can _only_ do this if I stand _right here_ the _entire time._ ”

“Fine.”

“You said you can do it with your _head_ too?”

“ _Mind,_ and only if you're super cool.”

Dipper snorted. “I assume _you_ can do it?”

“I _am_ pretty cool,” Bill said. “But it's hard with a body. Hence the landline.”

“What about cell phones?”

“They can't do it. But payphones can.”

“I never knew that. That's pretty sick.”

“No shit. The key is the area code.”

“That's some Hitchhiker’s Interdimensional Guidebook shit.”

Bill nodded. “I pretty much coauthored that series. Now, hang on while I call my pals.” He dialed Kryptos and the phone rang. He went to voicemail. Dipper looked at him expectantly.

“Hey, Kryptos,” Bill grinned. “It’s Bill! Yeesh, it's been awhile. I'm still waiting on a ride. Been on Earth for like, a few years. You can just call me back here. I know you guys are missing me. Alright, I'll try Ronnie and Hec. Laters.”

He hung up.

“No answer?” Dipper asked. Bill shook his head.

“I'll try Ronnie.” Bill dialed Pyronica.

“I still think you're kidding,” Dipper told him.

“I know,” Bill snapped. He went to Pyronica’s voicemail. “Ronnie, babe! It's Bill. How goes it? You'll never guess where I am! Still on Earth. Like, a decade. No biggie. Looking for a ride. You can call me here. Say hi to your mom!”

He hung up.

“No one is answering,” Dipper said. “This seems pretty fake.”

“Fine, I'll play you their voicemails.” Bill called 8-ball and hit the speaker button. A series of grunts started to play. “See? Hey, ace, it's Bill. We’ve known each other for about a _billion_ years? Call me.” He hung up

“Dude,” Dipper said. “You went _straight_ to voicemail.”

“Yeah.”

“Were you crying earlier, or was that Mabel?”

Bill kicked Dipper.

“Oh my god,” Bill sobs, as the end credit to _The Duchess Approves_ roll. “Oh my god. It’s just like my life! It’s just like my _life._ In a way. _”_

* * *

 

_Never. Because, you see...they're looking for you, alright. But nobody's looking for me._

_-“ International Rock Star” Stars_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. bill's expository dialogue on his home dimension was almost cut because i didn't think bill would share anything about himself with dipper. however, it now has plot relevance later on, so I edited the facts from it back in. Initially, I dabbled more into what had happened to his home dimension, and he made a bigger deal about it. also, he originally talked into dipper's "journal" (his phone) so he could record it, which felt wildly out of character to me.  
> 2\. also, i wanted to throw out my two cents on his backstory before we discover anything in the journal of the time pirates, so in addition to what i stated before, here's a loose description on my take on bill's backstory, which i'll be using for this fic: "liberation" could be used to describe the fate of bill's dimension. bill had always had the potential for a lot of energy and power, and as soon as he was able he quickly began to develop them, and only grew in power, energy, etc. however, as his dimension was very small and constraining, he soon realized that he could only grow so much before it either caused a dramatic shift in their dimensions energy (probably for the worst), or before these constraints began to take their toll on him (also probably for the worst). bill's solution was to try to "fix" his dimension so that he could "fit". long story short? it didn't work out so well, especially for the rest of the dimension.  
> 3\. tony is going to be entering the scene soon, so this chapter sets up a lot of the conflict and plot for a lot later on, after tony's dealt with.  
> 4\. C I P H E R H U N T ! ! ! ! ! ! i'm obsessed. i'm addicted. holy shit! holy shit! guys! GUYS! GUYS! one of my gravity falls pals is actually at csssa right now and he found the clue there ages before it even started and didn't even know!!!! i'm so excited about this! i love following along and i wish i could do something for the hunt itself... so have an earlier than planned update.  
> 5\. tomorrow i start my summer writing program, but am lowkey super sunburnt from wandering around a town i got stranded in yesterday. i called my mom for extra money on my card, then my phone died. the bus drove right by me. i enjoyed walking around and ran into a few people i knew though!  
> 6\. ALSO THE JOURNAL AND TIME PIRATES ARE LITERALLY RELEASED TOMOORROW I'M SO EXCITED AND I HOPE MINE SHIPS REALLY DARN FAST


	5. The Divided Realm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here comes dat boi 
> 
> i think i could have gotten this chapter a bit finer but i wanted to keep posting my lil baby and it was high time for an update, sooo... it's loooong overdue but take some tony y'all! things are bout to take a turn!

“Oh my _god,”_ Bill opened his eyes. “What is it? What _is_ it, Mabel?”

Mabel stopped making loud noises. _“You’re awake!”_

He yawned. “Yeah, I-”

 _“We have to go, like, right now._ ”

“What?” Bill sat up. “Why? Go where?”

_“He’s coming. We have to get out.”_

“Tony?” Bill stood, and started to change out of her pajamas. “Tell me how.”

_“Get dressed.”_

Bill grabbed one of Mabel’s bras and pulled it on, then a tee. He opened her drawers to grab a sweater.

_“Hurry!”_

_But I don’t know which sweater to wear. Ooh, it’s the shooting star one! I like this one._

_“Faster!”_

_Pants or skirt?_

_“Pants.”_

Bill pulled on her cargo pants. “Okay, let’s take on the world!”

_“You forgot underwear.”_

_Fuck!_ Bill pulled the pants back off, then grabbed some underwear, and pulled them back on. _Okay, socks, socks, putting socks on, phone- where’s your phone- here’s your phone! Headphones- You have a grappling hook?! And attack glitter!_

 _“Bill! Seriously!_ Fast!”

Bill stuffed her phone, charger, grappling hook, and headphones into one of her beanies, stuck on her hair clip, and sprinted down the stairs. He really liked to running in socks. He always felt like he was going to fall.

Mabel was still screaming at him to go faster, so he pulled on the first pair of shoes he saw- her light up sneakers.

 _“Kitchen,”_ Mabel told him. Bill went into the kitchen. _“The drawer on the left.”_

“The knife drawer!” Bill reached in, and found the largest one. He pricked it against his finger. Yep, sharp. “Is this one good?”

_“It’s fine. Go onto the back porch.”_

Bill put the knife between his teeth and unlocked the door.

 _“Let me do it,”_ Mabel said. Bill withdrew.

Mabel took the knife out of her mouth and set it down next to her. She could feel the barrier- it made the hairs on her arm rise, and it felt cold on her skin. She reached forward, and her hand snapped back.

Bill sniggered. _“Was that your plan?”_

“Shut up!” Mabel picked the knife up and angled it towards the ground. With care not to move past the porch, she pushed the knife down against the wood, and to the ground. The unicorn hair, wherever it was, didn’t give any resistance. The sky just flickered pink, then turned dark again.

 _“What time is it?”_ Bill asked.

Mabel let him slip back into control. _“I don’t know.”_

He opened up the beanie and checked her phone. _One in the morning. How did you know Tony was coming?_

_“I was meditating.”_

_Is_ that _where you go all the time?_ Bill felt a chill on the back of his neck. _Kid, you’re over practicing. Don’t want to go to far with that stuff, I should know. You can probably only take so much- You should be hanging out with me instead. I watched this awesome movie last night-_

_“The Duchess Approves, you told me, and I’ve seen it before. The barrier’s down now, so we can go.”_

Bill cheered, stuck the phone back in the beanie, and went back inside for her keys.

_“Hurry hurry hurry-”_

He snatched her keys off the hook in the kitchen and sprinted into her car. He stuck the key in the ignition.

 _“No, wait,”_ Bill paused as Mabel spoke. _“We shouldn’t drive. He’s coming. He’s coming here now.”_

 _Okay._ Bill grabbed the keys and hopped out of the car. He heard a yell and saw Dipper sticking his head out of his bedroom window. Bill waved.

“Bill!” Dipper shouted. “Can you even drive?”

Bill cupped his hands around his mouth for volume. “Probably! Not.”

“Do you need a ride somewhere?”

“Nah! I’ve just really gotta go!”

“How’d you take the barrier down?”

“With a knife! Sorry, kid, but I’ve gotta fly. I’ll swing by later!”

Bill took off towards the woods.

“What? Hang on, I’m coming down.”

“No!” Bill screamed, and started down Mabel’s favorite path. He thought he could hear a car.

 _That’s him that’s him that’s him,_ Mabel thought. Bill felt her heart beginning to race. _His_ heart beginning to race.

 _We’re getting out we’re getting out,_ he told her.

_Waitwaitwait_

_Dipper,_ they both thought.

_You said to hurry. You said we have to hurry. Come on._

_Dipper._

Bill is breathing heavily and running as fast as he can-

 _He’s coming. We have to_ hurry. _You said to go fast. I’m going._

_We have to get out,_

_Yeah, but Dipper and Ford are still there and_

_He’s coming_

_We have to get out,_

_I’m good leaving them. I don’t care._

_I don’t care about them._

_It’s all going to get ripped apart_

_That won’t change if you stay_

_He’s going to take my life from me_

_I already took it_

_Dipper and Ford Dipper and Ford Dipper and_

_I don’t care about them why should you go back you don't need them,_

_They're my family,_

_I’m your friend_

_You have me you don’t need them come on let’s just_

_You’re my_

_Please let’s_

_Please_

_I hate you all._

_Fine._

_Bill!_

_Thank you. I’m sorry. Thank you so much. I’m sorry._

 

_Let’s go see what this Tony looks like._

 

_You can beat him up._

_Okay, now I’m excited._

* * *

 

The stairs creaked as Bill climbed them. He set his feet down on the porch, softly. He heard a car door, and knocking. Impatient knocking on the other side of the Shack. There was a smash.

_“Bill Bill Bill please thank you”_

Bill stuck the beanie into one of his pockets. He turned the doorknob and crept inside. Bill peeked through the kitchen door. He had the knife in his right hand.

Dipper was on the stairs, hand over his side, looking pained and out of breath. Bill could hear footsteps on the stairs.

Mabel was shaking. _“OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD.”_

He stuck his head through the door and waved to Dipper.

Dipper’s eyes widened. _Get out of here,_ he mouthed.

_“Don’t listen to him.”_

Bill shook his head and held up the knife. Dipper tried to sit and made a hissing sound. “Oh my god,” he whispered. “Ow. Ow. Get out. Go. Ow.”

Bill could hear someone walking around upstairs.

“Is that him?” he asked, as quietly as he could. Dipper nodded, and pushed himself off the stairs.

“Basement.” Dipper pointed towards the gift shop. Bill nodded and stepped forward. A door was flung open upstairs. Dipper stuck his hand under the sofa, grabbed the bat and a gun,  and stuck them under his arm. He followed Bill toward the gift shop. Dipper keyed in the code, and pointed to the counter. There were a few cheap pairs of sunglasses there. Bill grabbed them all, and stuck one on.

There were footsteps above them. Fast. Angry. The vending machine opened. Dipper stepped inside.

“Wait,” Bill realized. “You’re going to lock us in there?”

“Bill, come on, there’s food down here. We’ll be fine until he leaves.”

“You’re gonna lock us in there until he’s gone? How long will that take?”

Dipper dropped the bat and grabbed his wrist. “Bill, come on, I know you don’t like it but we have to-”

Bill pulled back. “No no _no,_ I am _not_ going down there, thank you very-”

“You have Mabel’s body, he’s going to-”

 _He’s on the stairs he’s on the stairs,_ Mabel thought, too fast and loud for Bill to hear anything else.

Bill backpedaled toward the door. “I’ll just run for it-”

Dipper started after him. “No, we have to-”

“Nope, not-”

“It’ll be too late and-”

_“Dipper? Mabel?”_

Two voices were yelling their names- Mabel was screaming at him- Dipper’s nails were digging into his wrist and pulling him toward the black hole and someone was searching for them for _him_ upstairs- Bill dropped the knife and covered his ears-

 _B I L L  P L E A S E  B I L L_   _D I P P E R_

Bill pushed Dipper into the basement and slammed the vending machine shut. He grabbed the knife, stumbling backwards into the wall. Tony stepped into the room.

 _Oh my god,_ Bill thought, shaking. _He’s the most cliché, buff demon_ ever _. Are you kidding?_

His skin was bright red and everything. He had horns. His teeth were sharp. Bill wasn’t shaking anymore. He was like a cartoon villain or something. This so wasn’t his level.

 _This is what you’re afraid of? He looks like some cheap Satan. Satan_ isn’t _scary looking. Okay, he’s huge, but-_

Mabel had stopped screaming. Bill could still feel her heart racing. But he was on the verge of laughter. He was gonna open up a can of whoop-ass on this jerk.

Tony grinned. “Babe!” He started towards Bill, opening his arms. “Man, it is _great_ to see you!”

 _He’s not scary, kid,_ Bill thought. _Are you serious?_

 

_Bill, please._

_..._

_Okay._

 

Bill pointed the knife at Tony. His smile didn’t drop, but his eyes went cold. Okay, that was a little creepy.

“Oh,” Tony said, still moving toward him, his arms still open. “Is _that_ how it’s gonna be?”

Tony dove towards him. Bill dropped under his arm and swung the knife, nicking him at the side. Tony hit the wall hard, but bounced back easily, lunging at him once more. Mabel was starting to panic again. Maybe this guy did have something to him. Bill waited for him, then ducked and stuck the knife into his side. Perfect. Bill pulled away.

The knife was stuck.

_Oh no-_

_“What does that mean?”_

_Nothing, everything’s fine-_

Bill let go of the knife and stumbled backwards, but Tony was already grabbing him around the neck and _wow that hurts-_ Mabel was screaming and now he was being pushed down onto the counter and Tony was stepping on all the neat piles of stock Dipper had made. Bill kicked as hard as he could and tried to pry off Tony’s fingers but his hand was getting tighter around his neck- _weak spot._ Bill let go and went to hit the soft space inside his elbow but he couldn’t reach and his arms weren’t moving and he was dizzy and it was dark there were spots and why wasn’t he moving he was being squeezed and-

Tony yelped and moved sideways, jerking Bill into the register and releasing him. Bill sucked in a long breath and screwed his eyes shut, then opened the, panting. Dipper was standing next to him with a bat. He kicked the vending machine closed.

He turned to Bill, and pointed the bat at him. “I can’t fucking believe you.”

“Wowza,” Bill wheezed. “That was close. Thanks, kid, I owe y-”

Tony leapt at Dipper. He dropped the bat in his move to dodge him, but wasn’t fast enough, and Tony threw him towards the door. Bill heard the glass shatter, and a sharp crack as Dipper’s head hit the frame. Mabel wouldn’t stop screaming his name. Bill started towards him.

_No, no, Tony-_

Tony grabbed Bill’s collar and yanked him back. Oh man, his throat was killing him. Tony was gonna pay for this Tony was _strangling_ him again. Bill tried to kick his groin, but no luck, so he went for the elbow, but Tony was just holding him up with one hand and blocked him, this wasn’t good, this really wasn’t good-

“Hey, Dipper,” Tony called, turning toward the door. “You up yet? Have a good look at your sister’s face.” He plucked the sunglasses off of Bill. “It’s turning blue. Neat, right? Now, watch close-”

Tony froze, staring at Bill’s eyes. He tilted his head.

“Okay,” he said. Dipper stood up and ran towards him, yelling. Tony dropped Bill and turned to block him. Dipper dodged, but Tony moved to catch him, and Dipper collided with his arm. Bill gasped for breath, and started to cough. He wiped his mouth. Yikes. That was close. Tony threw Dipper onto the ground and scooped up the bat.

“Let me guess.” Tony tapped the bat against the floor thoughtfully. “Bill Cipher?”

Bill sat up, rubbing his throat. “Hey,” he rasped, and started to stand. “Pleasure’s all yours.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “You’re intruding on a matter of personal interest.”

“So are you.”

 _“Do you know him?”_ Mabel asked.

 _No,_ Bill snapped. _You think all demons know each other? Well, all demons_ do _know each other, actually, so there is that._

_“So you know him?”_

_No, we’ve never_ met _, ever._

“Is that so? Well, I was here first.”

“No you weren’t.” Bill started to stand. “Do you know when I got here?”

Dipper sat up, nodding eagerly. “Bill’s right, he was here-”

“ _Dude.”_ Tony straightened, resting the bat on his shoulder. “I don’t _care_ when you got here. _I’m_ about to fuck up their lives, so you need to leave.”

“Heh, no thanks.” Bill folded his fingers together and cracked his knuckles. “I’ve had a monopoly on the Pines family from day one. I don’t think a little guy like you is gonna make me run away.”

Tony sighed, reaching into his pocket. “You’re making this _so_ much harder than it needs to be.”

“Yeah? Well, you’re a dick. And-”

Bill’s arms seized up and pressed into his sides, his heels clicked together, and he floated up into the air. Tony pulled a blue bolo tie out of his pocket.

Dipper’s eyes widened. He started to stand. “How did you-”

Dipper drifted into the air, surrounded by a blue haze.

“This?” Tony twirled the bolo tie around his finger. “Your friend gave it to me. I went by his house yesterday. He asked why you weren’t answering his phone calls.”

“You went to _Gideon’s?!”_

Tony nodded.” It’s kind of funny; I just said I was your friend and I was going to visit you? And he gave me _all_ this neat stuff to give you. Like this!” He pulled the tie over his head, and reached into his pocket. He pulled out two crumpled pieces of paper. “He said it was kinda private, so I promised not to look at it. Made me pinkie swear and everything. What a dork.”

 _“He went after Gideon!”_ Blood was rushing past Bill’s ears. Mabel’s voice was rising in his head. _“He could have killed him! I wouldn’t even know-”_

Tony unfolded the papers and held them up for Dipper to see. “Your girl Mabel left it at his house. Or maybe you did. Or,” he turned to Bill. “Maybe you did. And look, it’s you!”

Dipper seemed confused. Bill wondered if he had a concussion. Bill squinted at the page. It had Ford’s handwriting on it, and someone else’s. Dipper’s? Had to be, there was no one else stupid enough to write _Weakness: Synthesized Music(?)_. It was the Journal. But he’d burnt those himself-

Tony held up the other one. “This one, too. I mean, you guys should really keep better track of your stuff? No telling who might get ahold of it.”

Bill stared at the paper. It was for a summoning ritual, to get him to enter the minds of enemies, in Ford’s handwriting, wrinkled and yellowing- had those been what Mabel had summoned him with?

“Mabel!” he screamed, realization hitting him. “Mabel, you piece of shit! You fudged your-”

“Mabel?” Tony let go of the bat. “She’s here? Let me get a better look at this.” He crossed over to the light switch flicked them on. Bill winced and blinked at the sudden brightness. “Bill is trustworthy, great guy, blah blah blah, can be sent into your enemy’s mind, summoning spell-”

Bill tried to kick his legs. Dipper was staring at him.

“I’m going to kill you!” Bill screeched.

_“Me or him?”_

_Both of you! Mostly him, I’m kidding, you know that right, I can't believe you Mabel- the wrong ritual! You used the wrong ritual! You piece of- I can’t believe this-_

Tony shuffled the paper’s around. “To follow the demon into the person’s mind- ooh, a chant! That’s cool.”

Bill was flung back into the wall. He shouted and slid down onto the ground. This was so not good. This was so not a good day. Dipper yelled something.

Tony shoved the papers into his pocket, and picked up the bat. “Okay, Cipher, let’s take this to your turf. I’ll meet you in the Mindscape.”

_No no no no_

He advanced towards Bill, swinging the bat. “And say hi to my girl Mabel for me! I’m coming for you, babe.” Tony picked up the bat. Bill tried to move but the world around him was blue and Dipper was shouting and

 _NO NO NO_ NO NO NO NO NO “NO”

The bat came down. There was a pop and it was like Bill’s head was exploding, crazy fireworks, fourth of July, the world was spinning and

The bat came down again, and Bill felt hot and everything was suddenly moving too quick and too fast and

_“Bill Bill please Bill Bill”_

Tony dropped the bat and turned for the door. “Okay, dudes, I’ll catch you later.”

He flicked off the lights and closed the door. They both fell onto the floor.

Dipper jumped up. “Oh my gosh, Bill, Mabel, are you guys okay? Oh my gosh, I don’t know how he got those- I’m going to call Gideon, Bill, are you-”

Dipper had already picked up the phone. He set it down and started toward him.

“Are you okay? Are you-”

Mabel was screaming. Bill lifted his hand to hold his head, but it didn’t move.

Bill meant to say _“Aw, kid, you're worried about me?”_

The words didn't make it past his lips before he blacked out.

* * *

 

_MABEL_

_MABEL?_

_MABEL?_

_MABEL?_

_MABEL?_

_MABEL?_

_MABEL?_

_MABEL?_

_MABEL?_

* * *

 

**_L E A V E_ **

**_M E_ **

                                         **A L O N E !**  

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -my journal isn't getting here till tuesday???? at least now it's finally shipped tho! but i'm not sure if i can wait much longer????  
> -my parents are down to drive several hours for cipherhunt but now i actually gotta do stuff so alack   
> -i might actually make it to the gravity falls art show ?!!!!  
> -i don't want school to come back. so many people are ready but. not me. nah.  
> -another new deleted sequence: bill insisting that he would make a good parent. it will show up in the deleted scenes fic when the threequel starts going up!  
> -anyway i've been on the verge of an emotional mess lately but can't wait for the journal and also thank you all for the wonderful amazing beautiful comments!!!! wishing you guys the best of weekends and hoping you enjoyed this update! <3


	6. Head Trauma

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, i was like, i can't post it yet! i have to edit it more!!!! and then i was like hon the week is almost over and you don't want to forget all about your fav fic and your followers, do you? and i was like, no, me, i don't <3
> 
> exciting announcements: i spent the last two weeks doing a program with 826 Valencia, one of my favorite writing-related non-profits!! my work will be in a chapbook that is due to be released sometime soon. my contribution is, of course, gravity falls inspired and super duper weird. random, out of context line: "the spider, emptied of ducks, caved in on itself." i actually might consider turning it into a longer piece of work or possibly a podcast! speaking of podcasts, i've also played around with the idea of podding this fic. and finally, speaking of fics, i think i'm about to start posting a few new gf ones! i have two stan twins related ones, one lovecraft inspired and one an au, so be on the lookout for those coming soon! more info after the chapter probably.
> 
> love you all, enjoy the chapter!

Dr. Chiu pinched the bridge of her nose. “Dipper, I understand your concern, but this is serious-”

Dipper shook his head. “This is serious too.”

The two of them were standing in Mabel’s hospital room. Dipper had left a note for Ford, grabbed Mabel’s backpack and a few supplies, and locked up the house before driving her and Bill to the hospital. This had been a bad decision because, as Dr. Chiu had pointed out, he probably had a concussion, possibly head trauma. Dipper had twisted the story a bit to involve a robber breaking in, but all his getting thrown into stuff was still there.

“Mr. Pines, we're more than equipped to take care of your sister while we look you over.”

“I know, but I have to stay here with her.” Dipper was pretty sure that he should let her check out his head- after all, the walls at the Shack were pretty hard and he still felt a little disoriented- but right now, his biggest concern was Mabel’s unconscious body. “Can't it wait?”

“Why? She'll be fine. She’s hardly in intensive care yet.”

“I know, I just- it's hard to explain. I called a few friends who can sit with her while I get my head checked, they'll be here soon.”

Dr. Chiu sighed. “Alright. Candy was close with you two, so I'll make an exception. But I want to give you a check up myself before twelve hours go by.”

Dipper smiled gratefully. “Thank you so much, Doctor. You have no idea how much this means to me.”

Dr. Chiu nodded, and glanced over at Mabel. “This does clash a bit with our visitor policy, but since we had to rush her in, I suppose we can let it slide. I’ll see you soon.”

She left the room quickly. Dipper pulled out his phone. Soos and Wendy were both on the way. He'd also texted Gideon and Pacifica, and they would probably call in the morning. He'd sent them Wendy’s number too, in case he wasn't available to answer his phone.

Soos and Wendy had each picked up after only one ring. Even now, they still had their phones set so that his ringtone would play even when they were on silent. They were both on their way.

Dipper looked over at Mabel. She had a huge knot swelling up on her head, and Dipper was pretty sure he did as well.

He glanced around the room- no cameras- and reached into his jacket. He'd gotten in the habit of carrying a hand puppet around since Mabel’s possession. This one was made to look like a frog. He set it down on her bedside table, next to the stuff Bill’s had on him when he somehow got out. Her phone, headphones, a beanie, and Mabel’s trusty old grappling hook.

“Mabel?” he asked quietly. “Bill? Are either of you here? I've got this puppet. So, hit me up if you can.”

He watched the puppet. Nothing happened.

“Okay.”

Soos arrived around two, and Wendy got there at about two fifteen. Dipper explained the situation as best he could. Soos had clear memories of their first encounter with Bill in Stan’s mind, and they could all recall the Glove Story incident with Mabel’s sock opera.

“But how'd he manage to possess Mabel?” Wendy furrowed her brow. “She's smarter than that. How long has this been going on?”

Dipper shook his head. “I… I don’t really know. I think she might have asked him to possess her, but that's all I've been able to figure out. Bill’s pretty secretive. Anyway, I put this puppet here in case either of them want to talk to you. I told Dr. Chiu I'd let her give me a checkup, so I'm gonna go do that real quick. If Bill or Mabel wake up, just tell them where I am and don't leave them alone. If a red guy with horns and yellow eyes shows up, don't let him get near them. Actually, don’t let in anyone you don’t recognize. Alright, I'll be right back.”

Dipper headed out of the room. At least he knew Tony _ was  _ back. And Bill, too. He felt sick to his stomach, but he was currently totally updated on where everyone was and where they were going. More or less.

He started toward Dr. Chiu’s office. She looked up when he opened the door. 

“There you are. Sooner than expected.” She sat aside her folder. “Have a seat.”

Dipper sat down, feeling a little dizzy. “Thanks.”

“Are you feeling alright?”

“Sure, you?”

“Fine. No vomiting, headaches, dizziness?”

“Uh, all of the above, actually? I had to throw up before I came here.”

“Well, you don’t sound alright to me. Honestly, Dipper, I’m already certainly that you are almost definitely concussed.”

Dipper nodded. “So, rest up, relax?”

“Yes. Just take it easy.”

Dipper grinned. “Trust me,” he lied. “I’ve got no plans to do anything else.”

* * *

 

Wendy and Soos has ushered Dipper out and told him to sleep, but he was outlining the next season of his show with his phone in the cafeteria. He'd just thought up a really funny episode title when Gideon called.

“Hey,” he answered.

_ “Dipper, it's me, Gideon. I just got up for a snack and I saw that you called. Is Mabel okay?” _

“Yeah,” Dipper said. “No, actually. Honestly, things are kind of bad. Can you and Pacifica maybe meet me at the hospital at nine?”

_ “I'll call her right now! I'll be right there.” _

“Oh, sure,” Dipper said. “That totally works.”

It was five in morning.

“Dude.” Dipper turned at Wendy’s voice, setting down his phone. “No sleep for you? Fine, I'll get us some coffee.” She breezed past him and to the counter. A moment later, she sat down two black coffees.

Dipper couldn't stomach black coffee.

“Any updates?” he asked.

“Mabel-Bill is still out. No movement all night. I think I'll have to clock out soon, my shift today starts at seven and I might need to go home and change. Will you be good here? And dude, will you  _ sleep _ ?”

He nodded. “Paz and Gideon should be here to help.”

“Ain't that dandy. Alright, stud, since you've got things covered I'll head back to my place.” She took his hand. “And Dipper, Mabel will be  _ fine.  _ This will all work out. Just call me when you need me again, I'll be here ASAP. And take care of yourself!” 

Wendy stood up, leaving her coffee on the table. Dipper rubbed his eyes and pulled up Mabel’s backpack. She'd had some of his books on her when Bill possessed her, and some of Ford’s, but even stranger, she had a thick folder he'd never seen before. It was labeled  _ PRIVATE PROPERTY OF STAN PINES. DO NOT TOUCH. THIS MEANS YOU, PAL _ so Dipper could probably guess who the original owner was. He opened it. Just some Polaroid photos, the rest was just papers, probably stuff about tax evasion or revenue. He couldn't take his eyes off the photographs. One was of the portal- Stan had written Day Zero, and had blueprints for the portal. Why did Mabel have this? Why did  _ Bill _ have this?

The other file was one he recognized. Ford had shown it to him when he was like, twelve. Dipper flicked through it, but found nothing new, so he opened Stan’s folder again.

“Dipper!”

Dipper looked up. Pacifica, in slippers, pajamas, and near perfect makeup, was running towards him. Gideon was jogging behind her, looking… short. He closed the file and waved.

Pacifica went to get them more coffee while Gideon sat down.

“This guy went to your house?” Dipper said immediately.

Gideon frowned. He looked tired, and  _ very _ confused. “What?” It didn’t help that his hair wasn’t fully done, and flyaway hairs made him look ten times as sleepy.

“He said you gave him some of our stuff. Did you know him?”

He looked confused for a moment or two, then nodded. “Right! No, he said he was your friend, Jared from high school. Why d’you ask?”

“We didn't go to school with him. Did Mabel tell you about Tony?”

“She mentioned his name a few times. Why- oh.  _ Oh.  _ Oh my gosh.”

“To be fair, I do think he might be able to shapeshift.”

“Oh dear. Oh dear oh dear oh  _ dear, _ is Mabel alright?”

Dipper bit his lip. “Well… No, but it's not  _ really _ your fault…”

Pacifica sat down their coffees and took a chair from a nearby table. “What’s your fault?”

Dipper slid the Cipher file to them. “Problem number two is Bill. He's a reality-bending demon whose powers are mostly based in your Mindscape and dreams, but he's always looking to expand. His end goal is the end of the world. Or I guess the world as we know it.”

“Mindscape?” Pacifica took the folder.

“That's your mind, hon,” Gideon said.

“Oh, ‘kay. Hey!” Pacifica held up a diagram of the Zodiac. “Isn't he the guy from your tattoo?”

“... No.”

Dipper snatched the diagram. “Gideon, you have a tattoo of Bill?”

“... No?”

“That's… Okay. Moving on. Something happened and Bill’s been possessing Mabel, but something in their deal was weird, so she's been MIA. It looks like she and Bill are sharing a body, which he’s been controlling, but that's just what I think, I'm not totally sure.”

“If that's problem two, what's problem one?” Pacifica asked.

“Tony.” Dipper picked up his phone and found a picture of him. “Mabel's ex. Normally he looks like this but we think he can shapeshift. He knocked out Mabel and Bill and I don't know how long it’ll be till they wake up, and he’s almost definitely in there with them. He basically showed up at the Shack last night and threw us both into stuff. He even kicked Bill’s ass. He said something about taking the fight to the Mindscape before he left. The biggest immediate problem right now is that he has the paper with the chant to follow Bill into the Mindscape. Gideon. You didn’t maybe… see it?”

Gideon began to pick at his nails. “I saw it, but I couldn't tell you what it said. I hardly read it. Gosh, I haven't looked at that page since-”

He sighed. “I didn't think so.” Dipper lifted up Mabel’s backpack and poured some of the books in it onto the table. “Guess we better start looking through these.”

“Oh! I've got some books at my house.” Gideon stood up. “Should I go get those?”

“Yeah, that might be good. But let's go through these first.”

Gideon nodded, and sat back down. They each took a book.

“We're looking for some kind of chant,” Dipper said. “It involves touching the person who’s possessed. That, or maybe even some kind of exorcism. Start looking.”

Soos left around noon, and Pacifica went in to sit with Mabel. Dipper and Gideon continued to aggressively skim and mark passages from Ford’s books for several more hours.

Around one, Gideon turned a page and there was a tearing sound. Dipper looked up and they met eyes. The page he was holding had completely detached from the book. Better yet, it had folded open, revealing two new pages inside.

“It's just a bunch of numbers,” Gideon frowned. “And pictures? I don't-”

Dipper’s face lit up. “It's a substitution cipher! Um, this is probably- no, wait- come help me look at this.” Dipper fished around in his pockets. “Do you have a pen or anything?”

Gideon went red. “I… don't, actually, sorry.”

“Um... okay.” Welp, he was being weird. “I think I might have one in my c-”

“I do!” Gideon reached into his bag, getting redder by the minute, and pulled out a blue  _ Lil’ Gideon _ brand pen.  He set it down, looking pained, and Dipper almost hesitated to take it. “Just don't click it-”

Dipper clicked it.

_ “Hello, America!” _ it trilled. Dipper snorted, and Gideon hid his face. 

“It's the voice of my nightmares!” Dipper grinned and clicked it again. 

_ “I predict you’ll soon say ‘aww!’” “You too could see…” “If you was wittle ol’ me!” “You people are the real miracle!” _

Dipper sniggered. “Man, this thing is great. Can I keep it?”

Gideon fidgeted with his collar. “Sure, but never show it to anyone, ever.  _ Especially _ not Mabel. Oh god-”

Dipper clicked it one last time, and Gideon buried his face again.

“Okay,” Dipper said. “We’re looking for four number words- with the same number at the end, twice. Like, one two three three, except probably not those.”

Dipper started to look through it. Gideon rummaged around in his bag some more. 

“My dad made a care pack for y’all,” he said. “I told him I was meeting him at the hospital, and he made me bring you this. Except I'm not gonna give it to you, since I don’t like y’all.”

“Thanks,” Dipper said drily. Gideon didn't say anything for a moment, and he looked up. Gideon was holding a pair of lamb shears. “You okay, man?”

“Why would I endorse  _ lamb shears?” _ he asked. “Why would I give them to you in a hospital? Oh my  _ goodness _ , father-”

“Just give me the stuff.” Dipper reached across the table and pulled away the blue box Gideon was holding. “Ooh, cookies! Say thanks to your dad. Wow, it's your doll.” Dipper closed the box and stuck it in Mabel’s backpack. 

“I have some more of your stuff,” Gideon said, reaching back into his bag.

Dipper looked back up from the page. “Why?”

“Paz said we should go to your house to get some of your stuff.”

“So you two broke into my house?!”

“Sweetie, the window was broken. It wasn't exactly hard.”

“Okay, throwback to when I was twelve. You didn't steal our deed, did you?”

“No.” Gideon pulled Dipper’s hat out of his bag. “I stole your hat.”

“What? Gideon!” Dipper swiped the hat from him and stuck it on. “There. I feel much more heroic.”

Gideon snorted. “You look like an idiot.”

“Shut up.” Dipper bent back over the page. “I think I found the substitution. Let's see if I have my-” Dipper rummaged around in his pockets. “Damn, I left my decoder ring at my house. Okay, I'll just draw it out-”

“There's a Lil’ Gideon brand decoder ring in your box,” Gideon said.

“Seriously? That's… random. Lucky, though.” Dipper pulled the care package back out. “Oh, here it is. Cool, your little eye-star’s on it. Okay, line them up… Have you ever decoded anything before?”

“Can't say I've had the chance.”

“Here, come sit next to me, I'll do this page and you do the other.”

“Alright.”

Dipper reached into the box for a Lil Gideon notebook, handed Gideon a piece of paper, and another pen from his care package. “Let's get cracking. Get it? Because, we’re cracking a-”

“I got it.” Gideon bent over and started to decode his page. “Like this?”

“There you go.” Dipper started on his page. “This is looking pretty promising. Is the rest of this chant on your page?”

“Yeah, I think so!”

Dipper took Gideon’s notes and compared them to his. “Dude, we did it! Victory!” Dipper held out his hand for a high five. After a moment, Gideon reached out and gave him the weakest high five ever. “That was terrible.”

“Well,  _ sorry! _ ” Gideon snapped. He clearly wasn't sorry.

“It's okay, we’ll just do it again later. Okay, let's pack this stuff up and go deal with Tony and Bill.” Dipper stuck their papers in his pocket, and jammed all of the books into Mabel’s backpack. He and Gideon headed toward Mabel’s room.

Pacifica stood up when they entered.

“Has she moved at all?” Dipper asked. Pacifica shook her head. “I gave you Soos and Wendy’s numbers, right? If you need to go, call them. They can't make it, then I've also got a list of people who could come but don't know what's going on. I'll text it to you.” Dipper pulled out his phone. “We need nine candles. Luckily, all of Mabel’s demon stuff was in her backpack.” Dipper opened the backpack and handed the candles to Gideon. “Here, start lighting these. I’m going to follow Bill and Tony into Mabel’s mind.”

Gideon started to light and set out the candles.

Pacifica got out her phone as well. “Just you.”

“Yeah.”

“And what about me?”

Dipper forwarded the list to her. “You and Gideon can sit here with Mabel.”

Pacifica frowned. “I'd rather go with you than just sit by.”

“You're not just sitting by, you're making sure her physical body is safe. And this way if you need to go for a party or something, you can just-”

“I think Mabel’s more important than a party, Dipper.”

“I know, but you might get pulled away. Besides, this  _ is _ really important. You're one of the only people I can count on to be here for her right now while I go deal with the demons.”

“What if you need backup?”

“I’ll be fine. If I need backup, I’ll text you or something, but I probably won’t. Besides, if I let Bill or Tony hurt you, Mabel would-”

Pacifica folded her arms. “Mabel wouldn't blame you for that.”

“What about me then? I don't want that on my conscience.”

“I don't know,” she replied coolly. “You've survived with  _ other  _ things on your conscience.”

Dipper paused. He didn't know what she was trying to imply, but she was looking very pointedly at Mabel.

“You're right,” Pacifica said, voice cold, face set. “It's probably best for me to watch her. I'll make sure nothing happens to her. If you need me in there, just say the word.”

“Okay,” Dipper said. “Thanks.”

She didn't look up at him.

“In the meantime, you guys could also look through this stuff to see if they’ll be a way to trap Bill after we deal with Tony.” Dipper handed Pacifica Mabel’s backpack. “She’s got some folders in there, and some books. Gideon, you can go get yours if you guys don’t find anything in there. Also, if you want to call my Great Uncle Ford, you can ask him what we have in the house but you  _ can’t _ let him know Bill’s here. He  _ cannot _ find out Bill is here, at all, ever, okay? I'll leave the chant with you, just in case.” Dipper touched Mabel’s forehead. “Paz, turn the lights off.”

Pacifica stood and flipped the light switch off. Gideon moved to close the blinds, so the only light came from the candles.

Dipper started to read.

_ “Fidentus omnium. Magister mentium. Magnesium ad hominem. Magnum opus. Habeas corpus. Inceptus Nolanus overratus. Magister mentium. Magister mentium. Magister mentium.” _

The world went blue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you guys enjoyed!!! dr. chiu was originally candy's mom, but i've kind of put her into various different roles in candy's life in my head, and like them all, so make her a sister, aunt, cousin, whatever you please!
> 
> my upcoming fics:  
> -a mystery trio/stan twins au heavily (totally completely) inspired by lovecraft's the thing on the doorstep. it is near completion and the first chapter will be up as soon as i decide it looks good enough for public eye  
> -a short multichap in which ford suffers from short term memory loss. it will be up as soon as i title it!
> 
> thank you all so, so much for all the support this fic has gotten, i'm sorry that i haven't gotten around to some comments but i've been a bit busy lately, which is how i WAS A LITTLE LATE ON FINDING OUT ABOUT THE CIPHER STATUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHH! ALEX'S POSE WITH IT IS MY NEW LOCK SCREEN.
> 
> devoured the journal and two time pirates paths in one day, so delighted, so happy, yes, yes, yes, yes,yesyesyesyes
> 
> art show!!!!! !opening tomorrow!!!! hoping to go sometime soon (bummed i can't make opening night and thank alex for everything)
> 
> have a great weekend!


	7. Dreamscapers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok, so... this chapter is like... R E A L L Y long. Like, super long. In fact, it's like, 20 pages. Why? Because I'm the worst editor, ever. Also, because lots of stuff happens. Originally Dreamscapers was gonna be 2-3 parts, but then I was like "you know what would be a great idea? making one unecessarily long chapter!" but then again, i did sort of disappear for awhile, so... yep. maybe you deserve this. also, i kinda wanted to get this next arc rolling.
> 
> my tumblr, gravitygals, has a "tmf" tag! hit it up for whatever it is i end up tagging with this fic series.  
> i'll be editing the playlist soon to reflect changes i've made to the plot, etc.  
> i'll be done with the third installment soon, so... that's weird.  
> happy reading! i love u all!

Dipper blinked at the sudden grayness, and then again at the brightness. He glanced around at his surroundings- gray signs pointing to the Mystery Shack, gray grapevines, gray grappling hook hanging from a branch, gray blanket discarded on the ground, gray teddy bear nearby, gray band poster, a thin metal rod, and the source of all the brightness, the giant pink bubble, marked with a shooting star, and chained.

He had the key somewhere at home, but he hadn’t thought to bring it. He started toward the bubble, and paused to touch the grappling hook that was hanging over a tree branch. After a moment of hesitation, he took it down and stuck it in his vest.

Dipper went to examine the bubble. He reached out to yank on the chain connecting it to the ground, and it bobbed slightly. Dipper geared up to jump, and soared up into the air. Man, the Mindscape was cool. Hopefully Tony didn’t know about the ability to make anything real in it- he might finally have an edge.

Dipper picked up the lock. It was hanging open. Dipper frowned at it, then pulled. The chains unravelled and plummeted to the ground.

He pushed through the wall. Suddenly, he was falling, and landing on a soft, yarn-y ground.

He’d been transported into another grayscale world. It looked like the inside of the Mystery Shack, but the wallpaper reminded him of their old house. The ground was strewn with yarn, and he could hear music in the distance.

“Mabel?” he called. “... Bill?” He could hear Mabel’s voice blaring through every doorway.

_“Has the wall always said Fort Cash Money?”_

_“I’m legalizing everything!”_

_“Revenge from the grave? Get Mabel Pines drenched while she’s pretty much in the nude in a forest? Wow. Ingenious. Should I leave? Is that what you’re trying to say, huh? Well, too bad. I’m staying-”_

_“You’ve broken up with guys, right?”_

_“Because he tried to kill you! Ha! That’s great!”_

_“I hope you don’t think_ little _of him!”_

_"Not superglued to a rock in a forest?"_

_“... woke up here…”_

_“They called him GRANDPA the KIIIIIIID! Yeah! Yeah! Remix! No, Grunkle Stan, wait-”_

_“See, I’m thinking that when the Shack is opened, I'll have a brochure stand. I think we should all be business partners-”_

_“I did your little circle thing. The zodiac prophecy. I couldn’t really remember the order, but here’s Gideon, here’s Robbie, here’s Ford…”_

_“Fuck you!”_

_“Stan explained all the laws about bribery to me when I was twelve, so I knew what not to say if the police came. Actually, maybe that was what I was supposed to do.”_

Dipper looked around. A bird with an elaborate plume on its head landed on his shoulder.

“Uh, hey,” Dipper said.

The bird opened its mouth and released a stream of synthesized music.

 _“Thank you!”_ it chirped, then flew away.

“Okay,” Dipper said. “You’re welcome. Mabel? Mabel? Are you in here?” He started to follow the piano. “Mabel? Bill? … Tony? Anyone here?”

 _Guess I just have to start looking?_ Dipper started down the hallway.

As if on cue, there was an audible _pop._ Dipper turned around.

“There you are!”

“Took you long enough!” Bill folded his arms. “How long has it been? A day?”

“I’m so sorry,” Dipper said, his stomach turning over. “Seriously, dude. Am I too la-”

“It’s _fine,_ ” Bill snapped, adjusting his hat.

“What did I miss? Did I miss anything? Have you seen Mabel around?”

Bill considered the question. “Nope.”

“Have you looked at all?”

“Nope.”

“What about Tony, have you seen him?”

“You ask too many questions.”

“Have you?”

“Haven’t seen the fella,” Bill said. “I do _know_ where Mabel is.”

“Where is she?”

“I mean. I know where she is. She’s _around._ Here, somewhere.”

“You do realize you’re the expert here? This could be really fast and easy if you wanted to hel-”

Bill sniggered. “Like _you?”_

“Wh- did you just- like _m-_ what?” Dipper wanted to scream. He’d almost forgotten how _irritating_ Bill was. “Fine, if you don’t want to help, I’ll just look through every door that’s here.”

“That’ll take a _really_ long time.”

“So? You’re being _useless,_ as usual.” Dipper started down the hallway, and Bill drifted after him. “By the way, what was that you started saying in the Shack?”

“What?”

“When Tony pulled out the papers, you started screaming at Mabel. Why? Because she left the papers? It's not her fault she-”

Bill folded his arms, then refolded them. “ _That.”_

“ _You_ were the one who possessed her and left them there-”

“I'm not possessing her,” Bill snapped. “That's the issue.”

“What? Yes you are.”

Bill shook from side to side… Was he shaking his head? “Nope. She fudged her summoning and messed up our deal. She created it the same way you'd make a deal with me to invade someone _else’s_ mind for you. Like that time with Stan, and the radical young men! That was fun. Why aren’t they here now? Then, on top of that, her soul wouldn't separate from her body, so I've basically been operating from her mind the last however long it's been.”

“So you've been like, outside, and Mabel was just inside her Mindscape?”

“I don't know. This doesn't normally _happen.”_

“You don't know?”

Bill hissed. “Shut up.”

“So you really _could_ talk to Mabel. That's why the puppet didn't work!”

“Yeah, sure, _that's_ why the puppet was dumb.”

Dipper shook his head. “That was a good idea. A puppet saved my life once. So would you two, like, swap out? Sometimes Mabel did stuff and sometimes you did? Like, that time when Ford came by-”

“Yeah.”

“Wow.” Dipper paused. “So when you locked yourself in the basement-”

“Shh! Zip. No more talking about me. Let's talk about something else. Let's talk about finding Mabel!” Bill had been bobbing in the air, but he suddenly went stiff. “Did you hear something?”

“What? No, I-”

“Shush.” Bill moved as if he were listening to someone. “I could've sworn I heard something. Was the door locked when you came in?”

“The bubble? No.”

“I locked it,” Bill said. “That's not normal! Locks don't unlock! Unless-”

“Let's split up,” Dipper said. “You look for a room that Mabel might be in. I'll start looking through her important memories. That way we can cover more ground.”

“Alright.” Bill bobbed up and down. “We’ll split up and look for clues! And Mabel. Mostly Mabel, actually. High five!” He high fived himself. “Okay, kid, see you!”

“Wait, Bill, how will I-” There was a popping sound, and Bill vanished. Dipper groaned. “-find you.”

He'd have to worry about that later. Right now, he needed to find Mabel.

* * *

 

_If I am lost for a day; try to find me_

_But if I don't come back, then I won't look behind me_

_All of the things that I thought were so easy_

_Just got harder and harder each day_

_\-        “Calendar Girl” Stars_

* * *

Bill was starting to get a little teed off at Mabel. He kept opening doors that led to Weirdmaggeddon. It had been cool at first, and Bill had seriously considered just slipping in to hang out for awhile, but what felt like fifty doors later, he was a little fed up. How many memories did Mabel have _left_ of Weirdmaggeddon? He was almost _relieved_ that he’d put her in the bubble.

“Yo, Cipher.”

Bill closed the door. Tony was standing behind him, in a pair of ridiculous sunglasses. Actually, they were pretty cool. But Bill wouldn't allow himself to like them.

“What’s a guy gotta do to find someone in here?” Tony rolled his eyes. Bill turned around to face him. “I mean, how long has it been? Seriously, there aren’t any clocks in here.”

“... Not long.”

“Well, _that’s_ a load off.” Tony leaned back against the wall, pushing up his sunglasses. “You seen Mabel?”

“Nah,” Bill said. “You?”

“Nope, that’s why I’m asking, dipshit.”

“Call me crazy, but I think Mabel’s ignoring you,” Bill said.

Tony grinned. “ _Crazy_. I’m just a guy looking for his girl. And if _you_ find Mabel, you can tell her that.”

“Uh huh.”

Tony laughed and shook his head. “Right, like _you’d_ find her. Defeated because he couldn’t tell two twins apart-”

Bill narrowed his eye. “What?” Any demon would have had trouble telling their physical forms apart, their energy levels were _blinding_. Didn’t Tony agree? “I mean, _yeah_ -”

Tony scowled. “As a rule of thumb, Cipher, I don't like it when people touch my stuff. Let me know when you find her, and I might go easy on you.”

“Big talk for a demon with a human form,” Bill snapped. “You’re in the Mindscape, kid. This is my turf.”

“I've got turf enough to call my own. Watch your back, Cipher, that’s all I’m saying.” Tony spun on his heel.

Bill took aim “Click!” he called.

Tony turned. “What's-””

_“Boom.”_

A gaping hole opened up in his chest. Tony’s eyes bugged out. “Neat trick.”

Bill grinned. “Honey, just _wait_ until I get started.”

“Oh, I don’t know if I can stand to.” Tony took off his glasses, and started to clean them off on his shirt. “So, I’m thinking. What do two demons do when they’re stuck together looking for the same person?”

“Are you suggesting an allegiance?” Bill asked, already knowing the answer.

Tony put his sunglasses back on, balancing them on top of his head. “I’m suggesting a _partnership._ I wanna find Mabel, you wanna find Mabel. I wanna kick some Pines ass, you wanna kick some Pines ass. It just makes sense.”

“Nice try.” Bill folded his arms. “I don’t team up with people who’ve attacked me. It makes for a bad partnership. And besides, this head is crammed enough as it is. If I were you, I’d get out while I’m still giving you the option.”

“Well, don’t you sound like a hypocrite.” Tony flicked his sunglasses back down. “After what that family’s done to you, I’m surprised you're not more eager to lend _me_ a hand.”

“That's because I despise you! Infinitely so. And what's more, I don't work well with others. And I _really_ hate sharing. _You_ have no claim to the Pines, least of all to Mabel.”

“Don’t I?” Tony asked sweetly. “Is true love not claim enough? Heh.” He folded his arms. “You think I’d _be_ here if I didn't have a claim to Mabel Pines?”

“Yeah, I do, because you’re obviously an asshole.”

“Whatever, bro. But remember, _she belongs to me,_ but I still don’t have enough reason to go after you. Catch you on the rewind.”

“That doesn’t even make any sense!” Bill shouted after him. He rolled his eye. He was looking forward to tearing Tony apart, but first things first. He had to find Mabel.

He opened another door. Mabel was looking at him from a vast, green meadow.

“Get in,” Mabel hissed. Bill sped inside and she shut the door.

“Kid!” Bill threw his hands in the air. “What a _relief!_ I was literally _just_ thinking about how I needed to find you. Nice place you got here!” Mabel moved away from Bill and sat down. Bill zoomed toward her. “Whatcha doing?” Mabel held up the daisy chain she was making. “Cool! Hey, your brother’s here. Did you know that?”

“Yes.” Mabel pressed her hand onto her forehead. “I could sense his energy.” She winced. “There’s a _lot_ in here right now. It’s giving me a migraine. Tony followed you here.”

“Yeah, but he didn’t find you!”

“He followed you here.”

“Yeah, but- never mind. Was that why you kept shoving Weirdmaggeddon in my face? So Tony wouldn’t find you?”

“No.” Mabel finished her daisy chain and offered it to Bill. “That was because after you didn’t apologize to me, I decided not to be your friend, and I wanted you to remember that, because I still want you to apologize. I thought it was a good opportunity.”

Bill placed the daisies on top of her head. “I told you, I don’t apologize.”

“I know. I also told you to leave me alone.”

“You did?”

“When Tony knocked us out.”

“Oh. Oh, I remember that now! Head trauma always makes me _so_ forgetful-”

Mabel rolled her eyes and started on a new daisy chain. “I’ve figured out _my_ plan. Tony can’t stay here forever. In the meantime, I get to stay in this nice little forest-meadow, and do whatever I want. Tony won’t find me, and I’ll be fine. If you want to stay, I won’t stop you.”

“What if I want to leave?”

“Then leave.”

“I tried that. Multiple times. You had the wrong summoning circle, plus we’re technically asleep. It looks like I’m stuck here.”

Mabel tied off her chain and draped it over Bill’s hat. “Oh. My bad. So what’ve you been up to?”

“Weirdmageddon memories, like I said.” Bill closed his eye happily. “I’ve had loads of time punch. Kind of avoided you for awhile cause I was mad, but I’m here now, so.”

“Oh,” Mabel said drily. “What’d I do _this_ time?”

“It was just the being stuck here thing.” Bill waved it off.

“Oh.”

“Yeah, no biggie. So are you just gonna stay here making daisy chains or are you actually gonna help us?”

Mabel glared at Bill, then took her chain off of his hat. “You know, I try _really_ hard for you, Bill. I try really hard to be a good friend, and I always just let all the bad stuff you say and do slide. Could you _maybe_ try too?” Mabel started to piece apart the daisy chain. “I mean, just a _little_ effort to not be an jerk to me?”

“What now?”

Mabel dropped several of the daisies onto the ground. “It’s really hard for me to even have Tony _here_. The only reason I’m feeling okay at all is because I think he might not find me.” She started to tear the petals off the last daisy.

Bill reached forward and pulled the flower away from her. “Okay, well, are you gonna talk to me about that? Because you haven't.” Mabel sighed. Bill drifted closer. “I mean, we don't have to. I haven't done much looking through your head but I could just glance around, if you wanted?”

“No, that's okay.” Mabel ran her fingers through her hair. “It's just kind of hard for me to... And honestly, it's kind of confusing and really complicated. Can I give you a simplified version?”

“Sure!”

Mabel reached down and tore up a cluster of grass from the ground. “Okay. So when we started dating, Tony was my first _really_ serious boyfriend since this one other guy that also sucked, back in high school. I’d dated other people, but I didn't really see like, a future with them. But- I don't know. I guess you could say I was infatuated with Tony.” She started to pick more daisies, tearing off the heads and dropping them into a pile. “We dated for a long time. I was totally smitten. Things were getting really serious and he treated me really well. It was actually looking like we might get married and start a family. I didn't think that was something I would _do,_ you know? But all of a sudden I was getting excited about it. I guess it- my parents- my mom and dad fought a lot, then they split up, and Stan and Ford never got along so- Having that meant _so_ much to me. Then one day that just sort of stopped. He seemed really moody. Then out of the blue he just disappeared. Gone, like _that.”_ Mabel dropped the daisies. “I thought it was just his way of cutting me out and saying ‘no, you're too weird and I don't want us to be a family’ which _hurt_ but it was… One thing. Then one day I- I woke up somewhere that wasn't my bed. I didn't know where I was. And something had happened to me. I don't even know how to explain it, I'm sorry. Tony came in and talked to me for awhile and it was just _bad_ , then he left and I think he drove away. After a while Dipper found me and we ran away from Tony together for awhile, but he kept finding us, so we split up. He didn’t find us again. Until now.” Mabel pulled up her legs. “I guess that doesn't _sound_ so bad, but- I don't _know_. It sucks.”

“What did he do?” Bill asked. “Should I beat him up?”

Mabel smiled weakly. “Yes, you should. He took… part of me. One of my organs, sort of?”

“Well alright, your attitude is excused. Wanna see a neat trick?”

Mabel nodded. “Okay, sure!”

Bill’s eye flattened and separated, and his body melted to resemble Mabel’s. He sat across from her and grinned.

Mabel frowned, then beamed. “That is pretty neat. Thanks.”

She leaned forward to hug Bill.

“Ahh!” Bill said. “Gross flesh hug!”

Mabel laughed. “Shut up, Bill.”

“Alright, brace yourself.” Bill wrenched back, and shifted his body to resemble Tony’s. “I'm Tony and I _stink._ You know why I stink? Cause I'm _shit,_ _bro. Duuude._ I stink like _shit_.”

Mabel sniggered. “Your arms are ruining it.”

“My arms?!”

“Here.” Mabel reached forward and pushed Bill’s arms to his side. “You always stick them straight out, like this.” She showed him, holding out her arms, and bent them at the elbow. “They're like right angles. Two of them is how many degrees there are in a triangle! You're giving yourself away.”

“To who, geometry nerds?” Bill snorted, and shifted back into his own body.

“I have a question,” Mabel said. “It's about your friends. You called them on our landline, but no one answered. Have they called back yet?”

“How should I know? You don't have the Shack’s phone in here.”

“What are you going to do if they call back?”

“Plan the apocalypse, _duh._ But first we'll have a cool party. You can come. I can tell them not to eat you.” Bill sat down next to Mabel, kicking his feet. “But don't worry, I'll stick to the deal. No weirdness until you don't have to worry about it.”

“What if they don't call back?” Mabel asked. “Would you still do the whole Weirdmaggeddon thing if it was just you?”

“Eh, it'd be hard without backup, but it's whatever. You should just have me do it _now_ and be my backup!”

Mabel laughed. “No, thank you. If you did Weirdmaggeddon now I’d have to fight you and our friendship would totally die.”

“Yikes.”

“Can I try on your hat?”

“Okay!”

Mabel removed Bill’s hat and placed it on top of her own head. It teetered for a moment, then fell. She picked it up, dusted it off, and handed it back to Bill. “It's too small. Maybe cause it's two dimensional and I'm not? That reminds me. I have another question.”

“Shoot.”

“When you locked us in the basement by accident,” Mabel said, and Bill winced. “Sorry. It’s just- You really freaked out. Why? I mean, it's totally okay that you did, there’s nothing wrong with that, and of course I understand if you don't want to talk about it. But I am trying to be your friend, and friends do sometimes talk about stuff like that.”

“Guess we aren't friends then, huh?” Bill willed a glass of cider to appear in his hand, and had a sip.

“Oh. Okay.”

“I'm just not fond of a few things. You know, small spaces, the quiet, stuff like that. But that's just a personality thing, and it's not something I'm gonna talk about with anyone. Definitely not _you_.” He'd been hoping Mabel wouldn't bring it up, because she seemed to have a knack for weaseling people into talking about touchy subjects. Mabel was fine, likable, even, and he’d already taken her side against Tony. But she wasn't going to get him to open up and start having _therapy_ sessions with her. A heart to heart was the _last_ thing Bill needed.

“Alright,” Mabel said, sounding hurt.

“Dipper’s looking for you,” Bill told her.

“I think it might have been better if he'd just left.” Mabel reached up to wipe her nose. “Back when I made that deal with you. I feel so _bad_ saying that, but then maybe we wouldn't be in this _stupid_ situation.”

“Are you okay?”

Mabel shook her head. “I'm good. There’s just so much happening in here at once. And Tony, he's inside my head and stuff. I don't like that, but I can survive it. I keep having to regulate what memories of mine he's seeing. And I don't really know what to show him. What do I show him? What am I okay showing him? I don't know. I don't _know,_ ungh.”

“Show him me! I'm cool.” Bill posed. “Don't you have an awesome memory of me turning giant and fighting your house robot? That will be _really_ intimidating! Then there's the one where I grow extra arms and chase you in a death race! I had _so_ many extra teeth. And then I almost killed you!”

“Which you still haven't apologized for.”

“Not planning to. Aw man, I sorta feel bad about the bubble though. You missed all the cool stuff. I had a car! And I killed Time Baby. Did you know I control time? Time Baby still technically exists since time travel so I let him do all the _work_ but once I get a _real_ physical form again, it's gonna be sweet.”

“That is pretty cool.”

“You also missed when I built my cool house. I just _made_ it. It rose up _right_ out of the ground. It was a Fearamid! Get it?”

She frowned. “Because it was a pyramid?” Mabel sniggered. “That’s terrible.”

“Yes! You're so smart, this is why I like you.”

Mabel made a face. “Okay, this sounds weird, but can you not over compliment me? You can, if you want, but it makes me feel weird. I don't really trust you. And you flattering me is really... not like you. Plus I know you totally doted on Ford, and- yeah, we both know how you guys worked out.”

“Yeah, he fell hard for false flattery. That totally alliterated! Nice job, Bill. Thanks, Bill! You're welcome, Bill-”

Mabel stiffened. “Can you _not_ talk about Ford that way?”

“Sure, but you don't really like him.”

“What?!” Mabel frowned. “I _do_ like Ford.”

“You have complained about him almost every time I’ve seen you.”

“Yeah, because it's hard sometimes. Not unlike you. But he’s still my family and I still love him.”

“Hang on, I'm _much_ more likable than old Fordsy.”

Mabel shoved Bill over, laughing. “I don't know about that.”

“Oof, don’t make me angry.”

She rolled her eyes. “Wow, I’m so scared.”

* * *

 

_Time can take its toll on the best of us_

_Look at you you're growing old so young_

_-        “Heart” Stars_  

* * *

 

Dipper wasn’t having a great time. He’d only opened five doors, and he was starting to feel like a piece of shit. It was hardly Mabel’s fault that every memory he saw made him feel bad, but that didn’t make him feel any better.

He opened his sixth door. This was something new.

Mabel was wearing a hospital gown, and giggling. "You're- you're stuck to the- that's hilarious!"

Bill- Bill was with her?- made an angry sound. "It is not!"

“That is too good!” Mabel gave into her laughter, falling back onto the ground. "You're glued to a piece of rock!"

"It's not glue!"

She clutched at her sides. "And thus, the world is saved!"

"Not yet, it isn't!"

Mabel stopped laughing. Bill was glowing red. She wheezed and started to laugh even harder. She fell forward, then sat back up, wiping her eyes. "I'm sorry it's just- it's a little hard to take you seriously when you're-" Mabel sniggered.

"Stuck. The word you're looking for is stuck."

"Nah. You're like- a stamp! On a statue envelope!"

"What?"

"Or- or- oh my gosh, you're like a sticker.” Mabel lit up. “That's _great_."

"I fail to see the greatness."

"Everyone likes stickers!" She hit his top hat. "Bill! You're finally likable!"

" _E X C U S E  M E !_ " He was glowing red again. "H A V E  Y O U  F O R G O T T E N  T H A T  T H E  L A S T  T I M E  W E  S A W  E A C H O T H E R  I  W A S -"

Mabel giggled. "Not superglued to a rock in a forest?"

"It's not glue! I- what are you wearing?"

Mabel looked down, and fixed her paper. "That's just a hospital gown."

"A what now?"

"I told you, I crashed my car." Bill looked at her for a moment. Mabel picked up a juice box. "You've been pulling me into the Mindscape. I kind of fell asleep at the wheel."

"You were driving?!"

Mabel pointed at him triumphantly. "I knew it was you!" She had a long drink of apple juice. "Did you see I bought you some gold? Did I remember that right?"

"That gold is not real."

"Sorry. Apple juice?"

"I-"

Mabel shoved her apple juice into his eye. Bill screeched, and she pulled it back. "Did I get that wrong? Is that not your mouth?"

Dipper smiled in spite of himself. That was _funny_. That was seriously _hilarious_. Except he didn’t know what the fuck was going on. Had that been after she crashed her car? After he’d dropped her off, she’d marched off into the woods and found Bill stuck to a statue? What the heck?

Dipper watched the scene play out. Mabel started to drag Bill along by the wrist, and Bill was yammering about energy or something. He closed the door. Had Mabel moved Bill’s rock or whatever it was? Where to?

As if on cue, his phone began to ring.

Dipper answered it. “Gideon?”

 _“Pacifica,”_ Pacifica said.

“Oh, hey Paz.”

_“Hi. This is my phone, not Gideon’s.”_

“My bad. What’s up?”

 _“Real talk,”_ Pacifica said. _“Does your family know what’s up?”_

“No.”

_“Like, not even your uncle? Seriously?”_

Dipper rolled his eyes. “What are you, my conscious?”

_“No, I’m serious. I was just talking to Gideon about Bill and reading some of those books. He’s really dangerous? Like, what the fuck is going on?”_

“It’s kind of complicated. But trust me, Bill is not as big a problem as-”

Pacifica cleared her throat. _“Do not summon at all costs. Whatever you do, don’t let him into your mind. One of the most dangerous monsters I’ve ever-”_

“Gideon said that?”

 _“No, idiot,”_ Pacifica snapped. _“I’m reading it_.”

“What? From where?”

_“I don’t know, it’s a photocopy. It’s from the Stan Pines folder?”_

Dipper’s heart stopped. “A photocopy from Stan’s folder? What of?”

_“Just some notes on Bill, I guess. The rest of the page is missing, Gideon said Tony has it? It looks like it’s from some sort of journal, there’s more of them…”_

Dipper stopped listening. Holy shit. Holy shit. Stan had photocopied the third journal. That paper would have to be nearly a decade old. Holy shit. One of the journals practically still existed.

 _“Dipper? What the_ fuck _is going on? Is Mabel okay?”_

“Yeah, we- wow. We. We need to focus on Tony first. He’s a bigger deal to Mabel, and honestly, he’s a lot meaner.”

“You take that back!”

Dipper swore and nearly dropped his phone. Bill was floating behind him.

“What the fuck!” Dipper shouted. “Don’t do that! Sorry, Paz, I’ve gotta go. I’ll text you updates.”

_“Dipper-”_

“Hi!” Bill circled around Dipper. “What’s up? Guess who’s great and found Mabel first? It’s me! You may now give me prizes, adoration, a cool statue, gold! Give me gold!”

“What? I don’t have any gold, I’m not giving you gold. You found Mabel?” Dipper glanced around, relieved, but didn’t see her. “Where is she?”

“She’s with me!”

“No? Bill, if this is-”

“She’s with me, but not right here. There’s two of me right now! Ooh, I’m gonna make a third-”

“Wait, not right now. Where’s Mabel? Should I come meet you guys?”

“Yeah,” Bill said. “About that.”

“No,” Dipper shook his head. “ _No_ , Bill.”

“Yes, yes Bill!”

“No. Tell me what the fuck is going on.”

“Mabel has a plan! She’s going to wait it out.”

Dipper pinched the bridge of his nose. “Wait _what_ out? Tony? _You_?”

“Tony, not me, you dipshit. Wait! That was really funny. _Dip_ shit! Get it? _Get it?!_ ”

“I get it! Where’s Mabel? Can I talk to her?”

“She’s picking flowers.”

“What? Where?”

“Here, duh.”

Dipper really, really wanted to punch him. “Can you take this seriously for five seconds?”

“One, two, three, four-”

“Bill! What does Mabel say?”

“She said ‘I’ve thought things through, and I’ve figured out _my_ plan. Tony can’t stay here forever. In the meantime, I get to stay, and do whatever I want. Tony won’t find me, and I’ll be fine.’ Except I have to stay too. I guess that’s a problem. But I can also do fun stuff. I copied myself just now and my copy is hanging out in Weirdmageddon. It’s really great. I’m having time punch. Hang on, I’ll get you some!”

“I don’t want- time punch? What is that? I don’t care, I don’t want it. What I _want_ is to talk to my sister. Are you going to help me or not?”

“It’s not my fault your sister doesn’t want to talk to you. She isn’t even paying attention to you! Yeesh, that must hurt.”

“Fine!” Dipper snapped. “I’ll find her on my own.” He opened the nearest door.

Mabel looked to be about twelve. She was pressed up in some sort of box, reaching to hand something to a formally dressed Dipper- no, Bill- he was after the journal-

_“Who’d sacrifice everything for their dumb sibling?” Bill-Dipper asked._

Dipper slammed the door shut.

“Someone’s in a mood,” Bill retorted.

“If you're not going to help, can you stop bothering me?”

“No, I like bothering people. Hey, this door seems fun!” Bill opened the closest door. “Look! I'm fighting a giant robot!”

Dipper rolled his eyes and went to shut the door. “Can you at least tell me where Tony is?”

“So he can beat you up some more? Sure!”

Dipper wished he could roll his eyes harder, and opened the next door. Mabel looked to be about, sixteen, no, she had to be fourteen if they were in Gravity-

He went white and slammed the door shut.

“Ooh, what’s that one?” Bill asked.

“Nothing.”

“Reverse psychology won’t work on me, dipshit, I’m a master of manipulation.”

“I know. You’re great at it.”

“Well, to brag, yes. Did your uncle ever tell you about that time with the portal? Heh. He built the _entire_ thing, that was sweet.”

“Wait, really?” Dipper grinned. “That’s impressive.”

“Oh,” Bill said. “You bastard. You can’t distract me with flattery. What’s in the door?”

“Seriously, man, it’s nothing important.” Bill reached forward to yank it open. Dipper leaned over to block the handle.

“Yeah, _real_ useless, so why can’t I-”

“It’s, uh, it’s not- trust me, it’s not gonna help at all-”

“How do you know?”

“I just _know_ , okay? Mabel’s _my_ sister. We’re _twins._ I think I would know if-”

“I feel excluded.”

“Because I don’t want you here!”

“I’m gonna get mad at you. That means lightning.”

“I just have to think of cool fighting stuff and it will happen.”

“I can’t believe you’re trying to argue with me in _this_ situation.”

“You’re trying to argue with me.”

“Tony’s just _wandering_ around right now-”

“Fine!” Dipper threw his arms into the air. “Okay, fine! Go _nuts_ , man, have a ball!” He stepped aside.

“You know? I will. I’ll have _such_ a ball.” Bill grabbed the door and watched the memory play out. Dipper turned. “Hey, where are you going?”

“I’m not gonna sit around while you waste time.”

“What’s in that memory?”

“I told you, _nothing_ that-” Dipper turned around. Bill was fully transfixed by the other side of the door. Dipper leaned against the wall and slid down into a sitting position. “You're right,” he groaned.” This is hopeless.”

“I'm always right,” Bill said without looking at him. He sounded distracted. “It's always hopeless. Neat coincidence.”

Dipper pulled off his hat and started to comb through his hair anxiously. “Don't _you_ know a way to get Tony out of here?”

Bill turned red.

“Dammit,” Dipper said. “This is the new worst day of my life.”

“What was the old one? When I possessed you? When I was gonna kill you?”

Dipper tipped his hat at the door. “Before _that_ one, it was this monster we had to fight who ate eyeballs.”

“And before that it's me scaring you!”

“That was eight years ago, and I was, like, twelve.”

“And how old would you be here?”

“Fifteen.”

“So are you going to… elaborate on this, or-”

“What, you want me to tell you why it happened? I don’t _know_ why it happened. Mabel doesn’t like to talk about it. Life fucking sucks and stuff. Shitty school system, puberty being the worst, _everything_ is confusing, sexuality stuff, her family was awful, and all that shit.”

“Her _family?”_

Dipper pointed at himself. “Clearly!”

“I’m not following.”

“And before you ask, sleeping pills and alcohol, I found her. It’s a touchy subject. Don’t make any jokes about it.”

“Right. I’m still not following.”

“Yeah, because I’m not leading,” Dipper snapped, standing up. “It’s none of your damn business.”

“But why would-”

“We’re moving on now.” Dipper grabbed him to pull him away from the door. “This is us, moving on. We’ve already wasted enough time. Come on, let's go try to find-”

Dipper’s phone began to ring. He dropped Bill’s arm to answer it. “Gideon?”

_“It's Pacifica. Again.”_

“Gosh, Paz. I'm so sorry. I keep doing that. I'm just tired-”

_“Luckily for you, I'm actually calling off his phone this time. He's using mine to call your house.”_

“My house? Why?”

_“We’re calling your uncles.”_

“No. No no no, Paz, you can't-”

_“You fought a demon! Your house is probably a mess and they're probably really freaked out-”_

“They don't even live together! Stan is on some beach gambling! Plus, he hates Gideon! You can't have _Gideon_ call him! And you _cannot_ call- either of them! Neither of them can come here!”

 _“Well, only family is allowed to stay with Mabel after visiting hours now that she's settled._ ”

“Well- neither of them will pick up!”

_“Stanford just picked up. Gideon’s talking to him right now.”_

“No! No!” Dipper angled the phone away from his mouth. _“Uuagh!”_

“Okay,” Bill said. _“Wow.”_

_“Stop screaming. Gideon, can he come? Okay, he's coming.”_

“No! What did you tell him? Did you tell him about the demons?”

There was some shuffling, and Gideon came on. _“Hey y’all! Is Mabel there? Did you find her?”_

“Is that _Gideon?_ ” Bill sniggered. “I love that guy! Let me talk to him!”

Dipper stepped away from Bill. “Gideon, what did you tell him?!”

 _“Just that Mabel’s in bad shape and it’s something not natural. He said he'll be here within the hour._ ”

“Gideon! You can't let him come here!”

 _“... Oh. Too late now. Why don't you want him to come? He's the_ author. _He can help!”_

“No, no, you don't understand, this is very-” Bill grabbed the cell phone. Dipper yelped.

“Excuse me,” Bill said gravely. “Is your… refrigerator running?” He paused. “That's terrifying! It's alive! The fridge uprising is at hand! Lock your-”

Dipper snatched the phone back. “I’ll be awake in a second.” He shut his phone off. _“Bill!”_

Bill cackled. “That kid is _great!_ ”

“Can you at least _try_ to take this seriously? You're stuck here until we deal with this Tony thing. What's going to happen to you if something happens to Mabel?”

“What's going to happen to _you_?”

“Shut up! Bad things! To both of us! Probably! So we _need_ to sort this all out and then you can fuck off and kill baby dreams and have demon parties or whatever and I can work on my show and Mabel can have her Shack and everything can work out! Do you seriously think we can just fuck around until Tony finds one of us? Mabel’s in a coma! What happens if he decides it's easier to just strangle her in her sleep or something? How long until him being her starts to _really_ fuck her up? What happens if-”

Bill slammed his hands where he might have had ears, his entire being turning bright white. Dipper was thrown back by a force so violent it seemed to come from all around. He struggled to breathe, and a loud chorus of voices rang out around him, some clearly Mabel’s, others closer to Bill’s, their words blending together-

 _“I DON’T KNOW I DON’T” “LET ME OUT LET ME OUT” “GET HIM OUT-” “HIDE ME HIDE” “DON’T” “LETOUTOUTOUTOUTOUTOUTGETOUTOUTOUTOUTOUTOUTOUTOUTOUT”_ “ _Lebam syas ot tuhs pu pots gniklat! Ouy t’nod wonk tahw- tou- tel em tou- on on on on on on on- ouy- t’nac- shup- em- tou- lebam- ouy- t’now- tel- em- tou- TOU-”_

_TOU TOU TOU LLAMS TLAF TOU LEBAM OUY T’NAC PEEK EM TOU T’NAC SHUP EM TOU TOU TOU LEBAM LEBAM EREHW ERA OUY_

Bill looked up at him as the whole world started to flicker, dark now light now dark now light, and-

_“YOU CAN’T-”_

There was a quick flash of black and everything was normal. Dipper was gasping for air.

“Alright,” Bill said sweetly, completely unperturbed. “You do what you need to do.”

Dipper jolted up, chest heaving, and everything was quiet. Mabel was asleep. Pacifica was folding her hand over his and smiling. Gideon was looking at him with a nervous expression.

“It’s okay,” Pacifica patted his hand. “Your uncle Ford is here. He can help, right?”

Dipper shot out of his chair.

* * *

 

_You're cold, maybe you just missed the sun_

_You fall, feeling like it’s just begun_

_So far, keeping it together's been enough_

_Look up, rain is falling, looks like love_

_Your boy is like a memory_

_Some sense of touch and a melody_

_Your girl, she's a renegade_

_A hurricane that keeps you there, safe_

_A hurricane that keeps you there, safe_

_-        “Look Up” Stars_

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> announcements!:  
> 1\. workin on some sweet aus, oh yeah. i know i always say that but i swear i'm workin hard  
> 2\. i may make a new pseud and move this series over to that one soon! either delcatty or gravitygals.  
> 3\. i love gravity falls  
> 4\. surprise  
> 5\. my room has a "gravity falls corner" now


	8. Can We Get Back to the Real World?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can we get back to the real world?   
> please?  
> yo  
> i met the irl daveed diggs sooooo.... YEAH!  
> this update is loooong overdue, but i had a pretty busy week. plus, wifi crashed :P  
> i hope you all are doing great! thank you so much for so many kind comments all the time, i love y'all

“You need to calm down,” Pacifica told him.

“I do _not_ need to calm down,” Dipper snapped, and adjusted his hat for the fifth time. “And besides. I am calm. Do you _know_ what will happen if Ford finds out about Bill? You don’t understand, it’s just- what did you tell him? Did you tell him about Bill?”

“No,” Pacifica folded her arms. “I just said a dangerous demon knocked her out and went into her mind. _You_ said that was problem number one. _You_ said that we didn't need to worry about Bill.”

“That's the problem! Great Uncle Ford _will_ worry about Bill! Oh my gosh, this is so bad. Hang on, I'm going to try something.”

Dipper pulled out his phone and called Mabel. The phone rang for a few minutes. He heard _Disco Girl_ playing from across the room, then it suddenly stopped.

“Oh my gosh,” Dipper said, his breath catching. “Mabel?”

_“Yellow?”_

“Fucking-” Dipper groaned. “Bill, this is Dipper.”

_“Wow, really?”_

“Everything good over there?”

_“Yep, slammin.”_

“Um… ‘kay. Is Mabel there? Can I _please_ talk to her?”

There was shuffling and distant voices.

 _“Dipper?”_ Mabel asked. Dipper’s heart collapsed through his stomach.

“Oh my god,” Dipper said, his throat swelling up. “Mabel?”

_“... Yeah, it's me.”_

Pacifica reached over to hold Dipper’s hand. Dipper squeezed hers.

“I was- I was getting worried about you,” he managed to say. “Are you okay?”

_“Yeah, I'm okay.”_

“That's- that's good. I'm glad. Um, there's something- I should probably tell you.”

_“What?”_

“Um- I was in your Mindscape for awhile-”

_“I know.”_

“Oh, okay. Well, uh, I might come back soon? If that’s okay?”

_“Okay.”_

“While I was out, Pacifica and Gideon- they're here- they, uh- Mabel, is Bill listening?”

_“Bill, can you go check outside? You're good.”_

“Mabel, Ford’s coming.”

There was a long, static-filled silence.

_“Oh.”_

“He's actually outside.”

_“Ford doesn't know about- he's here? What are you going to tell him?”_

“Oh my god, I don't know. But- if Bill- and Ford- gosh, Ford carries guns everywhere- if he wants to go into your Mindscape- I can just tell him it's gun free!”

_“Does that make any sense?”_

“No! Crap, I don't know what to do.” Pacifica lifted up her hand. “Pacifica’s waving. She says hi.”

_“Tell her I say hi.”_

“Mabel says hi, Paz.”

 _“Dipper,”_ Pacifica dropped his hand and hit him in the shoulder. She hadn’t been waving. She’d been _gesturing._ “Gideon’s coming inside.”

“What? With- Mabel, Ford’s here, I have to go, help me keep Bill under wraps and I'll call you back as soon as I can I miss you and you're the best sister ever and _gotta go bye_.”

Dipper shut off his phone and stood up as the door opened.

“Great Uncle Ford!” he shouted. “I'm so glad you're here!”

Ford winced. “I’m not _deaf_ , Dipper”

“Sorry. I'm excited you're here to help me with emotional support. And just that?”

Gideon, who was standing behind Stanford, pointed to him as if he couldn't quite believe he existed. Dipper didn't know how to respond.

Ford clapped Gideon on the shoulder. “I was just chatting with this fellow outside, or else I’d have been here quicker. He's read my journals, you know!”

“Yeah,” Dipper said flatly. “They're a real hit. Gideon’s also _just_ here for emotional support _only,_ like you-”

“I’ve brought what I could based on what your friends told me.” Ford sat down in the last available chair, and Gideon shot Dipper another disbelieving look, this one less excited.

“Where do I _sit,_ ” Gideon hissed. Dipper shrugged helplessly.

Ford reached into his coat and a pile of books fell out. “Oh dear.”

“Ooh!” Gideon clapped his hands. “Those sure look neat!”

“You _dork,_ ” Pacifica said. “Can I help you with your books and- weaponry?- Mr. Pines?”

“No, that’s fine.” Ford dropped out of the seat to gather up his books and assorted weaponry. “We’ve met before, haven’t we?”

“Yes, I’m Mabel’s friend. Pacifica Northwest.”

“Northwest.” Ford repeated. “Preston’s daughter?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh.”

Pacifica smiled graciously. “I can hardly blame you for not being their biggest fan. I know I'm not.”

“Yes, well…” Ford nodded, standing up with a precarious pile. “Yes. And you, you’re… Gilligan?”

“Gideon, sir.”

“ _Gideon,_ the one with the tent and the hair? Yes, I think we’ve met too.”

“No, sir, I don’t think we have.”

Dipper coughed and made a gun with his hand, then pointed his his forehead. Ford nodded. “Ah, my mistake. Alright.” Ford sat down. “Fortunately, I do still have a copy of some of my notes on the Mindscape, though I did leave… most of them with Mabel.”

“We found some,” Pacifica told him. Dipper kind of wanted to hit her.

“Did you? Interesting. Fortunately, I still have some chants in this old book, that’s where I translated them from in the first place. I’ll need a moment to check this-”

“That’s fine!” Dipper said. “You can go to the cafeteria and-”

Ford frowned at the paper. “Yes, I think I still remember it!” He chuckled, and tucked it into his pocket. “Haven’t used that trick in a long time.” He placed a hand on Mabel’s forehead, then offered one to Dipper. “Shall we?”

“Um, I think we need to- relight the candles, actually.”

Ford turned around. “No, they seem fine. Oh, my guns!”

“I don’t think Mabel would want guns in her head,” Dipper said.

“Well, that sounds reasonably plausible!” Gideon nodded. “Mabel dislikes most violence! Except martial arts. And swordfighting. And pro wrestling. And- guess I’ll go get the lights.”

Ford tucked some weapons into his belt. “Let’s see. I’ve got my lucky gun and my best knife, and Stanley’s rifle, my interdimensional gun, she can do anything, and- oh, can’t forget-” Ford reached into his pile and pulled out a pocketknife. “Interdimensional pocket knife! Ooh, magnet gun-”

“I think you’re good.”

Ford tossed Dipper a magnet gun. “Wouldn’t want you to get caught without that again!”

Dipper set the magnet gun down. “I think we’ll be fine. But if _you_ need to spend some time getting more weapons, I think we’ve got a great knife at home-”

“Nonsense, I’m all ready.” Ford shut his coat. “And Dipper, do you have your pocket knife and notebook?”

“I’m not a _kid,_ Great Uncle Ford.”

Gideon sniggered. Ford glanced over at him, moving to put his hand on Mabel’s forehead. “Now, Gilleon, the lights, if you please?”

Gideon flipped the lights off. “It’s Gideon, actually.”

“Dipper.” Pacifica touched his shoulder. “Gideon and I will just head out when the nurse tells us, if that’s okay?”

“Yeah, alright.” Dipper took Ford’s hand. _Guess there’s no way out of this._ He desperately started to think of an excuse for Bill _existing_ and being in Mabel’s head, and- could Ford read minds? What if he could read Dipper’s mind through physical contact? What if-

Ford started to chant. Dipper joined him quickly.

_“Fidentus omnium. Magister mentium. Magnesium ad hominem. Magnum opus. Habeas corpus. Inceptus Nolanus overratus. Magister mentium. Magister mentium. Magister mentium.”_

The world started to turn blue-

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my birthday is coming up soon!!!!!!!! also, if any of you ever get the change, make squash soups any squash it's so good pls


	9. We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i thought the chapter title was funny for at least two seconds  
> this update feels long overdue, I am so sorry for the delay. on the bright side, one of my AUs is finally up (PSSST IT'S A LOVECRAFT AU, IS THIS NOT EVERYTHING WE AS A FANBASE DESERVE) and I really wanted to edit this more but as always I still step away feeling like i've broken canon and wrecked all the characters, whoopsies. on the Mr. Brightside, i like where the fic is going, i think? also, I AM SO SO SORRY FOR LEAVING ALL THEM COMMENTS HANGING I'LL GET AROUND TO IT SOON

Ford moved too quickly for Dipper to think of any excuses, any reasoning, and he just  _ hoped _ that Mabel was going to keep Bill from running into Ford. That was really his last hope. But honestly, Bill was so difficult and he could copy and  _ shit _ now they were going to the bubble and  _ shit _ now they were inside and  _ shit shit shit shit _ -

Dipper immediately spotted Bill-  _ shit- _ and quickly stepped in front of him while Ford examined their surroundings.

“A memory!” Dipper shouted. “I’m going to check it out!”

He sidestepped into the nearest door before Ford could say anything, dragging Bill along with him. Mabel was golfing at their high school.

“OMI _ GOSH! _ ” Bill yelled. Dipper covered his ears.

“Quieter!”

“Dipper! D _ ipper! _ You brought  _ Stanford _ here? You’re so great! You know what, I’ve made up my mind! I  _ like _ you again!” Bill started to muss up his hair. “Finally, some  _ good _ news! That reminds me, there’s bad news. You took a long time to come back. Because you were getting ol’ Ford? Yay! Not so yay. Tony didn’t leave. Luckily, I’ve got you guys to bother, so the next however long this takes should be fun! Why is Mabel golfing? Is she a golfer?”

Dipper looked up at the memory-Mabel, who was lining up for a swing. “Yeah, she was on our high school’s golf team. She actually plays for college.”

“Neat! We should go mini-golfing! I’m really good at mini-golfing.”

“Good for you. Look, you  _ can’t _ run into Ford. Haven’t you fucked his life up enough already?”

Bill blinked. “You do realize that-”

“Never mind, I know. I realize that.”

“I mean, if I had things  _ my _ way, I’d be fucking up your family for like-” Bill started to count on his fingers. “Let me see- three, four-”

“Shut  _ up. _ I’m terribly sorry, I keep forgetting you don’t have any feelings at all, I’ll try to stop that. Are you helping us or not?”

“Yeah, yeah, I-” Bill folded his arms. “Actually-”

Oh, come  _ on. _

“I told Mabel I’d leave you guys alone, actually. But then the possession thing. Hmm. Actually, I should give this some serious analysis.”

“What?”

“Leave me to serious analysis!”

“...  _ What? _ ”

“I must analys-ize! Go!” Bill pushed Dipper toward the edge of the memory. “Buh-bye!”

“What? Okay. Just don’t let Ford find out-”

Dipper fell out of the memory and landed on all fours. Ford was fixing one of his guns.

“Oh, Dipper, good. You’re here.” Ford tucked the gun into his jacket. “Anything in there?”

“Nope, nothing of interest at all. It’s literally golfing. But don’t worry, I gave it a thorough look-over, there is absolutely no chance we’ll find anything useful in it. That’s why I took so long, my… thorough look-over.”

“Good job.” Ford nodded approvingly. “Alright. If this is Mabel’s Mindscape, which it definitely is, then finding her shouldn’t be too-”

The door burst open. “Good news! I did the analysis-”

Dipper hit himself in the forehead. “Oh my god, Bill, I told you-”

“I  _ can _ help after all! Yay! Lucky  _ you _ -”

At this point it was difficult to hear Bill, as Ford had whipped his gun back out and was firing at Bill without any restraint. 

“Dipper, get down!”

Dipper scooted away from the stream of bullets and stood up.

Bill blinked. “Oh  _ man, _ this is  _ great- _ ”

“I told you to stay in there.”

“Nope. You did not say those words. Plus, I still wouldn’t have.”

“Great Uncle Ford,” Dipper said.

Ford dropped the gun and dove to tackle Bill. “Dipper, get out of here!”

Dipper grabbed Ford before he could fully launch himself at Bill.

“Oh no,” Bill deadpanned. “I’m being attacked.”

“Grunkle Ford,” Dipper said. “We have other problems right now.”

Ford made a sound that seemed to be a response, but not a comprehensive one, then pulled out his knife.

“Cipher-” he began to shout.

“Heeeeey.”

“Bill,  _ please. _ ” Dipper said. “You’re not helping.”

“No, I am helping! That’s what I just decided!”

“Not right now, you’re not!”

Ford furrowed his brow, then lowered his knife. “Dipper! Explain yourself! Now!”

“Uh,” Dipper said. “Well, um. Bill’s here.”

“Hi!”

“ _ I’ve noticed!” _ Ford said, voice rising. Dipper tightened his grip on Ford’s arm. “I _ demand _ an explanation!”

Dipper looked over at Bill. Bill beamed and clasped his hands together.  _ Oh, please, don’t- _

“Mabel and I are best friends!”

This was, of course,  _ exactly the wrong thing to say. _ Ford pulled away from Dipper and lunged at him. Bill sidestepped and he fell over.

“Dipper, I’ll handle this! Get out of my grand-niece’s head, you isosceles-”

“Ahhhh,” Bill said in a monotone, and floated from side to side. “He’s attacking me! Aaaaaahhhh.”

“Great Uncle Ford!” Dipper grabbed Ford again, and turned to glare at Bill. “Bill!”

“Haha, that’s me.”

“Bill, please explain why you’re stuck in Mabel’s head.”

“No.”

_ “Bill.” _

“She’s really bad at summoning demons?”

“Okay, I guess that’s kinda it? Anyway- Bill, stay still-”

“Uh, no?”

“ _ Anyway, _ ” Dipper said. “Bill isn’t the  _ only _ demon that’s like, in… here, right now, Tony’s here too.”

Ford blinked, then looked back and forth between Bill and Dipper. “... What?”

“Grunkle Ford, you met Tony over a face chat one time, maybe like, a year ago. He’s Mabel’s ex.”

“So?”

“He’s… not great.”

“He hit her with a baseball bat,” Bill said. “He also hit me with a baseball bat. And strangling happened. Also, he-” Bill sniggered. “He looks really funny.”

“ _ You’re _ one to talk,” Dipper grabbed Bill’s arm to stop his drifting. “So, as much as it  _ sucks _ that Bill is here and alive and like- talking and stuff-”

Ford nodded, and side-eyed Bill. “His talking  _ is _ awful.”

Bill narrowed his eye. “Everything I say is golden and you know it.”

“See?” Dipper pointed at Bill. “It’s awful. But, as horrible as he is, we have to worry about Tony first. It’s like that time when the world ended and I had to go after the overlord of Vegas before I could help fix the economy? Because you can’t  _ fix _ the economy until you defeat the overlord!”

“What?” Bill said, turning to look at him. “When was this? I didn’t ruin the economy!”

“This was a different time the world ended.”

“What? When?”

Dipper shrugged. “The world almost ends all the time now.”

“What?! Copycats! Copy-”

“What I’m trying to say,” Dipper said, talking over Bill. “Is that we have to go after the overlord of Vegas before we can fix the economy. We’ve got to go for  _ Tony _ before we can worry about  _ Bill. _ ”

“I’m following  _ that, _ ” Ford barked, wrenching his arm away. “What I  _ don’t _ understand is why he’s-”

“I don’t know, Mabel found him in the woods and gave him apple juice.”

“... What?” Ford blinked. “That makes sense, but- that doesn’t make sense…”

“Oho,” Bill chuckled. “I feel ya, Fordsy.”

“ _ Don’t _ call me-”

“Remember,” Dipper said. “Overlord before economy.”

“That’s right,” Bill said. “I’m the overlord.”

“No, you’re not, you’re-”

“I’m the economy?”

Dipper dropped Bill’s arm and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Man, I’m so tired.”

“You still haven’t answered my question.” Ford folded his arms. “Mabel gave him… apple juice? When?”

“I don’t know, I think it was after she ran her car off the road. Then I guess… she kept giving him apple juice and he possessed her?”

“Okay,” Bill lifted a finger. “That is  _ not _ what happened,  _ at all _ .”

“Oh,” Dipper snapped his fingers. “We also have to find Mabel. That’s a thing. Bill found her, but he’s, you know, the worst and stuff.”

“You’re making it sound like this is my fault!” Bill folded his arms, and Ford immediately unfolded his. “This isn’t my fault.”

“This is definitely your fault,” Ford told him. “I think we can all be sure of that, and you can’t trick  _ me _ so easily.”

“Can and have, pal. Besides! You know what? I think it’s  _ your _ fault.”

“Overlord, guys.” Dipper said. “Overlord before economy. Bill, where was Mabel last time you found her?”

“Through a door.”

“Thanks, Bill, that’s really helpful.”

“You’re welcome!” Dipper rolled his eyes, and Bill continued. “She had a door, and a pretty flower field. Also, you don’t need to  _ worry _ about Mabel. Mabel has a  _ plan. _ I’m more worried about me.”

“Good for you, Bill. Except literally no other person in the world cares about your problems right now. Overlord. Before. Economy.”

“That’s starting to make less sense,” Ford said.

Dipper  _ really _ wanted to scream. “Ford and me will go look for Mabel and you go look for Tony!”

“Okay, what do I do if I find him?”

“Anything! Rip out his eyes or something! I don’t care! Just get him out! Kill him or turn him into a baby head or something!”

“Hmmm…” Bill bobbed up and down. “Yeah, I can work with that.”

“Ford, we’ll go find Mabel!” Dipper grabbed Ford by the arm and marched down the long hallway. “Goodbye, Bill!”

“B _ y _ e!”

Ford turned to Dipper, not taking his eyes off Bill. “I don’t think it’s a good idea to leave him unsupervised.”

“Don’t worry,” Dipper said. “He hasn’t done anything yet, and it’s-”

“But he’s only been here so long, Bill’s always- he’s only been here so long, hasn’t he, Dipper? Hasn’t he? You’re agreeing with me, correct?”

Dipper nodded. “Yeah.”

“Really? Come to think of it, I haven’t been around so much lately, and- Dipper?” Ford turned to look at him. “ _ Dipper. _ How long have you known about Bill?”

Dipper bit his lip and came to a halt. “It’s not  _ my _ fault is here! He probably would have gone away if the possession thing hadn’t happened! I didn’t know, I didn’t hear about him, Mabel didn’t tell me! We wouldn’t have ever seen him again if-”

“If  _ what?” _

Dipper flinched. He’d been about to blame Mabel, but Mabel would never have trusted Bill if not for Tony showing up, and she wouldn’t have known about Tony showing up if not for him, plus,  _ he’d _ practically left her here. He resumed his pace.

“I can’t believe this,” Ford said, letting Dipper drag him. “That  _ thing _ came  _ back _ and you didn’t even tell me?”

“I didn’t know he was back until he was possessing Mabel,” Dipper admitted. “That was part of it.”

“Then what? You let him into our house?!”

“I didn’t want to let Mabel starve in the forest! He was starving the forest. He could have really wrecked her body, what if she’d died? Also, he didn’t know how to sleep! And I didn’t want to just let him wander around!”

“A lot of  _ excuses. _ ”

“It was really shitty of me, but I also- it’s- there’s more than that, it’s really complicated. And he’s been a decent houseguest, actually. He just asked to use our landline a few times. He snuck downstairs once but  _ just _ the one time and didn't do anything! I guess he did break the upstairs wall-”

_ “That’s _ what happened to the wall?”

Dipper lifted his hand and began to pick his nails. “Yeah, once I had the barrier back up I had him trapped! He was really mad.” 

“You brought the _most_ dangerous demon, who has _tortured_ our family, into our house and _trapped_ him there? With _us?_ _And_ on top of it, you didn’t tell anyone?”

Dipper started to chew his cuticles, then forced himself to drop his hand. “I’m really sorry. It’s been kind of weird. But it was better than not knowing what was going on, you know? I’m really sorry. I should have told you. Sorry.”

“How did you move him here? Is the barrier still up?”

He shook his head. “No, he took it down.”

Ford swore loudly. “Bill’s back  _ and _ the barrier’s down? Dipper, he’s in a human form and the portal’s in our  _ basement! _ He already got downstairs once! Oh  _ God… _ ”

“That’s okay, he doesn’t like the basement!” Fuck.  _ Fuck. _ Dipper had actually forgotten about the portal. “He locked himself behind the vending machine once and I think he- I actually think he might have had a panic attack? I think he’s really claustrophobic. That’s why he’s acting out, he’s stuck in Mabel’s head and it’s getting to him.”

“No. Dipper. He’s acting out because he’s the  _ villain. _ He’s not acting out at all! He’s  _ always _ awful. He’s not some deus ex machina who’s here to make all your problems disappear! I know from experience!”

“I’m not saying that he’s _ good! _ He’s just- overlord!”

“You keep saying that! Did  _ you _ forget Weirdmageddon too?”

“This isn’t about  _ Bill _ , Great Uncle Ford!” Dipper felt his nails digging into his palm. “Bill’s terrible but he isn’t the only terrible thing! And you aren’t the only person terrible things can happen to! This isn’t about him, it’s about Tony and Mabel! And the best thing we can do for her is go deal with Tony!”

“When Bill’s literally invading her mind?”

“That’s just because she fudged the possession! That’s-  _ ungh, _ can’t you listen to me for once? Why can’t you just trust me on this?!”

“Because you’re  _ wrong! _ ” Ford folded his arms again. “ _ I _ know Bill. I have experience with-”

“You’re always like this! You think you know everything about  _ everything _ !”

“Because I have experience!”

“So do I! You’re just- you’re obsessed with your experience! You make everything about you! You’re making this about you right now!”

“What? That’s ridiculous!”

“You always do this! You’re so- this is- Mabel would never have- you never think of  _ anyone _ except-”

“What?! Did you seriously just suggest-”

“Of  _ course _ not, I just-” Dipper let his hands fall to his sides. “I just think that what happened- everything terrible that year could have been avoided if you’d just-”

“How was I supposed to know what was going on?”

“You  _ talk  _ to her! When was the last time you talked to Mabel, really talked to her? You’re always-” Dipper stopped short. Ford’s expression had shifted, and he couldn’t tell what was going through his head. Oh  _ no _ . He could not believe he had just said that. “Grunkle Ford, I- I mean- I’m sorry, that was really out of line.” Dipper took in a calming breath. “Sorry about all this. It’s not that I don’t want to kick Bill’s ass too, believe me. I mean, I  _ get  _ it, it’s just that Tony- I- Maybe... we should split up?” Dipper suggested.

“That could be wise.”

“Cover more ground.”

“Yes.” Ford nodded. “We can all regroup at the exit. It should be easy to find.”

“Sounds good. Seriously, Grunkle Ford, I didn’t want you to have to worry about this.”

“Too late now.”

“Well, see you there?”

“Certainly.”

Dipper and Ford nodded to each other, and they each turned and went their separate ways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ford is here!!!!!! the overlord joke was kinda a nod to that one stephen king book where civilization collapses and there's like, one guy who takes control of SoCal or something??? i don't know, i only ever read the wikipedia summary of it. the joke seemed funny, idk. dipper's pretty experienced in world saving by now, huh?


	10. Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh boy, I don't know how I managed to avoid updating this for so long, especially when I didn't even bother to edit this chapter again. On the bright side, I've been somewhat diligent with updating TTOTD- so if any of you are in the mood for a Lovecraft AU this holiday season, I've got you covered! Seriously, I'm really excited about it, y'all should check it out.
> 
> As for this story: It's still going, of course, albeit more slowly now that I'm posting a few other things. The third installment is also almost completed, roughly. And this one is still being edited, as it goes up. Which is probably why I keep delaying it.

_ And then the next day _

_ How will you know your enemy _

_ By their color or your fear _

_ One by one you can cage them _

_ In your freedom _

_ Make them all disappear _

_-_    _“Celebration Guns” Stars_

* * *

 

Ford watched Mabel reach for Bill’s hand with a sick feeling at the base of his stomach. He'd learnt by now that no good could ever come out of an encounter with Cipher, let alone a deal. He couldn't believe he’d let Mabel convince him everything was fine when she'd known Bill was practically living in their backyard. Worse, he'd let Mabel trust him.

He watched as Bill cackled and came free from his statue. His gut twisted and his stomach dropped.

To his surprise, this wasn't the point where he had entered her mind.

At least Mabel had done things as properly as she could. Ford didn't think he would ever know how to make a deal Bill would stick to, but Bill was doing a decent job of pretending to take this one seriously. She’d clearly studied well. Of  _ course.  _ She had all his books.

Mabel  _ had _ taken this seriously.

Now Bill was insisting on giving Mabel a present. Ford felt as if the world were spinning around him and his head was set on vibrate. A dead bird. Mabel shouted and Ford flinched. He wished she hadn't had to have…  _ that  _ happen. Bill seemed to realize people didn't like dead birds and gave her… silly straws? Ford frowned. He tried to remember silly straws and Bill. He was sure he'd heard him say something about them.

Mabel liked the silly straws. His heart was pounding.  _ “They're just so silly!” _ He wanted to vomit. Now they were saying goodbye. Good. He wasn't sure how much of this he could take. They parted ways and Ford slammed the door shut on the memory.

He hadn't been nearly so thorough with any other memories, but he'd felt compelled to watch that one all the way through. He still hasn't found any explanation as to why Dipper had decided Bill wasn't a threat- he was definitely a threat, always- and he also hadn't found out what was going on. He'd had a conversation with Dipper weeks ago where Tony was mentioned, something back before he was going out of town, but then he decided to stay. Had that been because of Bill? How long at Bill been living in his house? How long had he been sharing a roof with Bill Cipher?

Ford decided to stop thinking about that and find Mabel, but he still felt sick. The last real conversation he could remember having with her was about Bill. She'd asked him about his feelings and invited him to sing karaoke. It hadn't gone well. She'd cried. She'd run out. Ford’s stomach was so knotted, he wanted to rip it out.

He reached for the next door, but was cut off.

“Hey, old man.”

Ford reached for his gun. Despite the low voice, he half-expected Bill. After all, it certainly wasn't Dipper. But, when he turned around, a man he didn't quite recognize was leaning against the wall. He looked eerily family, and quite frankly... a little ridiculous. If this was Tony, Bill had been right about that. His skin was red, to begin with, and he had  _ far  _ too many muscles, not to mention the yellow eyes and horns. The first thing that jumped to mind was a men’s sexy firetruck costume. Not the fireman. The  _ truck. _

“Hello,” Ford said slowly. “Tony, I presume?”

The demon snapped his fingers. “And you're the great uncle, right? I think we met over Skype or something?”

“So I've been told.”

“Sorry, it’s been awhile. Ley or Ford?”

“Ford!”

“Pleasure to see ya!”

Tony offered his hand. Ford didn't shake it.

“Oh, I get it.” Tony nodded. “Mindscape stuff, right? Don't worry, I'm not a dream demon or anything.”

“Yet, here you are.”

“Me? Naw. I just used a chant, I'm not such a big deal. I'm more of a  _ heart _ guy, you know? I'm all about the feels.” He grinned. “Name’s Tony, but you already knew that.”

After another moment’s hesitation, Ford shook his hand. “Nice to meet you again. You dated my grand niece?”

“That's right, sir. Sad to say we broke up awhile back.”

“Shame. How long ago was it?”

“A little under a year. I wanna say… Nine months? Maybe less.” Tony smiled at him. “Sweet girl, though. Real sweet.”

Ford nodded. He was right about that. 

This wasn't adding up. Why would Mabel date a demon? And why would he show up  _ nine months _ after their breakup and invade her head? It didn't make sense. If he had it out for her and Dipper, why wait? And how was Bill tied up in this? There was definitely something going on, and if Ford was right, Cipher was at the heart of it.

“What brings you here?” Ford asked, lowering his gun. Tony’s grin disappeared, and a melancholy look entered his eyes.

“Same thing as your, I reckon. We're both chasing Bill, right?”

Ford narrowed his eyes. “You're after Cipher?”

“Yep. If Mabel doesn't want anything to do with me, that's fine, you know? But if that bastard touches her-”

“I don't think you need to worry about that,” Ford said quickly.

Tony nodded. “True, very true, but you  _ know  _ what I mean, don't you, sir? That  _ demon _ ’s going to try and take advantage of her. You seem smart,  _ you _ probably know how freaky that guy is.”

“All too well.”

“Mabel’s already had a ton of shit. You know about when she was a teenager, right? And Johnny? I'm not gonna let that triangle manipulate her, or else something even worse could happen. You're after him too, right?”

Ford pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “Yes, that's right.”

“Hey, maybe a partnership’s in order! Are you looking for him and Mabel?”

“That's correct.”

Tony snapped. “Tell you what. I'll let you know if I find Cipher, you do the same if you find Mabel. Deal?”

“Sounds reasonable.”

“You got a phone number or something?”

“No.”

“Eh, I think we can find each other. It’s a plan! Nice seeing you again, Mr. Pines.”

“You too.”

Tony gave him a mock salute, then headed off,  _ whistling. _ He disappeared quickly into the maze of hallways. So Ford was right, this  _ was _ about Bill. He probably hadn't counted on Ford’s ability to have a civilized conversation; he'd thought his inability to trust would force him to rely on Dipper, who he'd also dragged into this. For some reason, Tony had come to challenge him, and for some reason, Bill wasn't able to fend him off on his own.

Ford turned to continue his search, and to his surprise, a new door had appeared. It was shaped like a triangle, covered with stickers, and a piece of paper taped to it read  _ BILL CIPHER  _ _ + _ _ MABEL MEMORIES (VESSEL) _ . That was… Not regular.

Ford approached the door cautiously. Had Bill caught on to him? He decided a look inside couldn't hurt. After all, he was fully equipped with weaponry, and opening the door couldn't do anything. Ford reached for the knob and turned the handle. There was a clicking sound, and the door opened.

It was another hallway of memories. A carving in the wall read  _ DAYS IN MABEL’S HEAD _ , followed by a tally. The walls were papered hectically, but the doors were all neatly labeled. Ford stepped inside, leaving the door open. Each door seemed to be labeled by notable features, then people and things involved, place, and on some, even date. There was a small bulletin board by the door, with a paper tacked to it.

_ ☆IMPORTANT HUMAN REMINDERS!☆ from Mabel _

 

  * __Always be breathing! Never not breathe!__


  * _Blink sometimes!_


  * _Sleep is good to have! Eight hours is best. Keep a regular sleep schedule!_


  * _Stop leaving the window open! Bugs fly in. The bugs bite and land on you and make bad noises._


  * _Eat healthy meals every day! Three is a good number (yay, three! Triangles! Math stuff! Three!)_


  * _It's bad to watch TV and stay inside_ _all_ _day. Go outside a bit!_


  * _The sun will burn your skin and_ _do not_ _stare at it_


  * _Always wear your shades! Dipper and I have spares_


  * _Mabel believes in you!!!_



 

❤  _ Love from me, Mabel! _

Ford stared at the list, then took it down and stuck it in his coat. The bulletin also contained a graph for a sleep schedule that looked unhealthy and exhausting. It bore resemblance to a college student’s. There were several grocery lists titled “DIPPER BUY THIS”, a television schedule, a frightening amount of stickers, and several photos of various objects in what must have been Mabel’s room.

Was this…  _ Bill’s _ mindscape?

Ford turned away from the board and opened the first door, marked  _ Makeup, Try One, Bill and Mabel, makeup, bathroom _ . Ford opened it. Mabel was leaning over the bathroom sink, holding a tube of mascara.

“What's this again?” her lips said, and Ford’s blood ran cold. Anyone could have mistaken it for Mabel, but he recognized the ringing voice of Bill Cipher, and when she turned her head, he could see the cat-like pupils. How had he been so blind?

Suddenly, the answer- to Bill’s question, not his- rang out. It was Mabel. Mabel was answering Bill.

_ “It’s mascara.” _

_ Nice. _

Ford frowned. Her mouth had not moved.

_ Alright, time to put it on my eye! _

_ “Careful, you just brush the lashes, you don't want to-” _

Bill dropped the brush and clamped his hands over his eye. “Holy fuck!”

Mabel started laughing. Bill dropped his hand, blinking rapidly. Mascara was running down his cheek, and his eye was turning red. Ford smiled and shut the door.

So, this was a collection of Bill’s memories from after he'd entered Mabel’s mind. Some sort of temporary mindscape. He could use this. For starters, he could figure out how he’d tricked Dipper, and how Tony had gotten involved.

Ford started down the hall, studying the labels.  _ FUCKING STUCK, _ _ The Duchess Approves (third viewing), Locked in Basement (not important AT ALL!),  _ and  _ ASSHOLE FRIENDS BRUTAL FUCKING _ seemed to be the most notable. Bill’s Mindscape was surprisingly well-kept. He found Tony’s entrance into the picture easily, and opened the door.

Bill, in Mabel’s body, sat straight up in bed. Mabel told him they needed to leave. Tony was coming. They needed to go because Tony was coming? Bill scrambled to get dressed and sprinted downstairs. He swiped a knife from the kitchen and managed to break the barrier- great- before getting ready to take off.

Then Dipper appeared.

“Bill!” Dipper shouted. “Can you even drive?”

Bill cupped his hands around his mouth. “Probably not!”

“Do you need a ride somewhere?”

“Nah! I’ve just really gotta go!”

“How’d you take the barrier down?”

“With a knife! Sorry, kid, but I’ve gotta fly. I’ll swing by later!”

Bill took off towards the woods.

“What? Hang on, I’m coming down.”

“No!” Bill screamed. Ford heard a car pulling up.

_ “ _ That’s him that’s him that’s him,” Mabel said. 

“We’re getting out we’re getting out,” he told her.

_ “ _ Waitwaitwait _ ” _

_ "Dipper, _ ” they both said, Bill nearly tripping.

_ “ _ You said to hurry,” Bill said without moving his mouth.  “You said we have to hurry. Come on.”

“Dipper,” Mabel repeated.

Bill was panting and struggling to run.

_ “ _ He’s coming. We have to hurry. You said to go fast. I’m going.”

_ “We have to get out,”  _ they both said.

_ “ _ Yeah,” Mabel agreed. “But Dipper and Ford are still there and-”

_ “He’s coming,”  _ Bill finished with her. “We have to get out, I’m good leaving them. I don’t care. I don’t care about them.”

Mabel paused. “It’s all going to get ripped apart.”

“That won’t change if you stay.”

Mabel’s voice broke. “He’s going to take my life from me.”

“I already took it.”

“Dipper and Ford Dipper and Ford Dipper and _ …” _ Mabel thought anxiously.

Bill made an irritated sound. “I don’t care about them why should you go back you don't need them-”

_ “ _ They're my family,” Mabel said. 

_ “I’m your friend,”  _ they both said, the dual quality of Bill’s voice making the words unnaturally loud. The lines of their dialogue had crossed, as if on a graph, Ford thought. It was unnerving.

Bill shook his head. “You have me you don’t need them come on let’s just-”

Then the words became too jumbled for Ford to fully understand who was speaking.

_ You’re my _

_ Please let’s _

_ Please _

_ I hate you all. _

Bill slowed, and turned around. “Fine _.” _

“Bill!” Mabel gushed, but got no answer. “Thank you. I’m sorry. Thank you so much. I’m sorry.”

Ford watched them return to the Shack.

Dipper was laying on the stairs, clearly injured. Tony was upstairs? After a moment, he and Bill came to an agreement, and they both headed into the gift shop. Apparently, Dipper had thought sticking Bill underground with Ford and the  _ portal _ was a great idea. Oddly enough, Bill was the one who disagreed. He shut the vending machine as Tony entered but didn't get out fast enough, and went to face him with his knife.

For some reason, this was the exact moment that Ford remembered what Bill had had to say about Tony when prompted by Dipper.

He has hit Mabel, and by default him, with a baseball bat. Also, there had been strangling. 

Ford watched in horror as the demon’s charisma disappeared, and he threw Dipper against the wall before going for Mabel’s neck. He didn't know it was someone else inside. Bill didn't seem to realize the danger of what was happening until it hit him that with his throat being compressed, he couldn't breathe, and began to kick wildly and make awful sounds, probably attempting to suck in air or make some remark.

“Hey, Dipper,” Tony called, turning toward the door. “You up yet? Have a good look at your sister’s face.” He plucked the sunglasses off of Bill. “It’s turning blue. Neat, right? Now, watch close-”

Tony froze, staring at their eyes. He tilted his head.

“... Okay,” he said. Dipper stood up and ran towards him, yelling. Tony dropped Bill and turned to block him. Dipper dodged, but Tony moved to catch him, and Dipper collided with his arm. Tony threw Dipper onto the ground and scooped up the bat.

“Let me guess.” Tony tapped the bat against the floor thoughtfully. “Bill Cipher?”

Bill sat up, rubbing his throat. “Hey,” he rasped, and started to stand. “Pleasure’s all yours.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “You’re intruding on a matter of personal interest.”

“So are you.”

“Is that so? Well, I was here first.”

“No you weren’t.” Bill started to stand. “Do you know when I got here?”

Dipper sat up, nodding eagerly. “Bill’s right, he was here-”

“ _ Dude.”  _ Tony straightened, resting the bat on his shoulder. “I don’t  _ care _ when you got here.  _ I’m _ about to fuck up their lives, so you need to leave.”

“Heh, no thanks.” Bill folded his fingers together and cracked his knuckles. “I’ve had a monopoly on the Pines family from day one. I don’t think a little guy like you is gonna make me run away.”

Tony sighed, reaching into his pocket. “You’re making this  _ so _ much harder than it needs to be.”

“Yeah? Well, you’re a dick. And-”

Tony pulled out an amulet. Then, to Ford’s shock, several pages from his journal. From Gideon? How on earth had Gideon gotten those?

Ford was starting to feel sick again. Tony still hadn't hit Mabel with the bat. He knew where this was going. He watched anyway. The memory faded to darkness.

He slammed the door shut.

Was this real?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't worry, ford isn't gonna get messed with too much. hopefully i didn't miss any gaping plot holes when i edited a few months back, cause I did not edit this before putting it up. oops.
> 
> on a lighter note: i have fallen in love. i found a cute boy on the internet and i am a little bit in love with him. having a hopeless crush on someone you'll never meet is kinda... fun? it's nice. no sense of obligation. i just kinda got out of a relationship that really wasn't good for me, which makes it even nicer. 
> 
> have a great one guys! another update sooooon!


	11. Sleeping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh boy oh BOY is this late oh wow i'm almost impressed by my TWO MONTH DELAY yikes . let's hope the formatting looks ok with ao3!!!!!

Mabel just really wanted to sleep. But sleeping was, it turned out, really hard when you were unconscious and everyone was super loud. She’d been able to nap just fine when Bill and her had been the only ones in her head, and they’d _both_ had the same messed up sleeping schedule, but now she was somehow out and in at the same time and _everyone was in there._ Everyone. Dipper wouldn’t be quiet and now _Ford_ was here too and there were probably fifty Bills all over the place and she was trying so hard not to focus on Tony and-

Mabel sat up and pulled up her legs. At least things were quiet on a basic level. She was alone in her field. That was nice. It was a really refreshing chance. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been

                                                                        _ALONE_

                                                                                             by herself and she’d forgotten how pleasant it could be.

Mabel picked another daisy and started to make another crown. She’d made a lot of crowns. She’d been able to make them all disappear, though, so at least she wasn’t surrounded by sad, lonely daisy crowns. Bill had been gone awhile now, and if she did end up seeing him or Dipper or Ford again before however long needed to pass passed, she’d make them reappear so she could give them some. She didn’t think Bill still had his. It had probably disappeared when she kicked everyone out.

She really wished she could kick everyone out again, except she actually wasn’t sure how. Welp, there goes that, right? Besides, kicking Dipper out had made her feel bad. It was seriously messed up to kick your own twin out, especially if he was just trying to help.

Mabel wondered if she could manage to shut herself off from all this, and decided to try. She laid down. _Just_ pretend _to take a nap. It’s like meditating, but instead of looking for something, you’re going inward. Will that work? I don’t know. I hope._

She tried it.

 

It was working.

* * *

 

“Hey.”

Bill turned around. Dipper was leaning against the wall looking, quite frankly, exhausted.

“Woaho,” Bill said. “Bag check for your eyes.”

Dipper yawned. “I’m tired, okay? Man, you look exhausted too.”

“No I don’t. I’m a being of pure energy with no weaknesses. I don’t get _sleepy_.”

Dipper snorted. “Right. Have you seen Ford?”

“He left with you.”

“You haven’t bothered him?”

Bill rolled his eye. “More important things? Economy and overlord or whatever? I mean, jeez, you give us a dumb speech you could at least remember it. I haven’t run into the old guy. _Yet._ I do make a point of bothering  him, but the economy or something, like you said.”

Dipper nodded. “... Right. Any luck with Mabel?”

Dipper blinked.

Bill blinked.

“I’ve got nothing new for you.”

Dipper gave him a mock salute. “Well, hit me up when you do, right dude?” He straightened, and spun on his heel.

“Just a minute,” Bill said. “I’ve got a few questions, kid.”

Dipper stopped, and turned. “Yeah?”

“What have _you_ been up to?”

Dipper stuck his hand in his pocket, and pulled out a small pack. “Gum?”

“... No.”

“Right, no mouth. Suit yourself.” Dipper unwrapped a stick of gum and stuck it in his mouth.

Bill narrowed his eye. He had a _mouth_. Dipper knew he had a mouth. This was just insulting.

“I asked you a question.”

“I’ve been looking for Mabel. Same as you, man.” Dipper stuck the pack back in his pocket, then blew a bubble. Bill watched as he let it deflate, and sucked it back into his mouth. In his experience, conversations with Dipper weren’t normally this tense. What the heck was he playing at? He was putting Bill on edge.

“Well.” Dipper shrugged. “You’ll tell me when you find her, right? Later, dude.”

He turned and sauntered off.

“Wait,” Bill said. “I have another question, kid.”

Dipper turned. “Yeah?” he asked, blowing another bubble.

“How dumb do you think I am?”

The bubble popped. Dipper’s eyes widened, then he grinned, and his body started to blur, and everything in him ran together, and Tony was standing in front of him. He pulled the gum back into his mouth to chew it.

“Sure you don’t want any gum?”

“Pretty sure.”

Tony pulled his sunglasses off the collar of his shirt and propped them up on his head. “Still no Mabel?”

“None for you either.”

“Nah.” Tony slouched back against the wall, grinning. “That’s why I’m hitting you up.”

“Oh, good.”

“You know who I did find? Stanford. What a _guy._ I mean, _yeesh,_ talk about someone putting gullible on the ceiling. Is that where those kids get it from? It almost makes me feel sorry for them.” Tony chuckled. “But mostly it’s funny!”

Bill sniggered. “Yeah. Good times.”

“Anywho,” Tony took his shades back down and started to polish them. “Ungh, I hate this new hair gel.”

Bill sniggered again.

“Any _way_ ,” Tony blew and popped another bubble. This was getting old fast. He stuck his sunglasses back up. “I’ve been looking for _you._ You’re a _lot_ easier to find.”

“Really.”

“I wanted to ask what _your_ claim to Mabel Pines is. Like I said earlier, we’d work better together than apart.”

“Someone’s smelling _desperate.”_

Tony smirked. “I know, I know. But hey, I’m serious. Let’s talk this out in private. How about here?”

Tony pulled open the nearest door and gestured for Bill to enter. He floated on in. Mabel was suntanning with Pacifica. They looked to be around fourteen.

“Okay,” Tony sat down, taking off his shoes. “Let’s dip our feet in this pool and have a chat, monster to monster. So. This is what I’m thinking. I mean, really, when push comes to shove? I just _love_ freaking out the Pines twins. Dipper’s been a thorn in way too many sides for _way_ too long. But we’re not dealing with _Dipper_ here. We’re dealing with Mabel.”

“You want to bargain for the life of Mabel Pines.”

Tony snapped and pointed finger guns at him. His smile was dazzling.

“You got it, pal!”

“You’re trying to charm me out of what’s mine.”

“Yours?” Tony tilted his head. “Well, that’s sweet.”

Bill realized what he’d just said, and felt icy horror begin to creep up inside him.

“She’s _mine_ ,” Bill repeated. “She’s my vessel. You know what I meant! You know that's what I meant, asshole. And I _told_ you, I’ve got a-”

“Yeah, yeah, claim on the Pines family. Okay, tough guy, we’ll pretend you don’t have feelings.”

He _didn’t._

“She’s my vessel,” Bill said. “They’re my prophecy. I’m not going to trade them away unless you make a damn good offer, _pal._ ”

 _“You’re_ not going to trade them away?”

Tony’s smile went steely. It struck Bill how sharp his teeth were, and how many of them he could see.

“I wasn’t asking _you_ to trade _me_ _anything._ ” Tony stood up, pulling his shoes back on. Storm clouds were gathering. Mabel grabbed Pacifica’s wrist and pointed at the sky.

“Wow, summer rain!”

“Neat!”

“What-”

Tony lunged toward Bill and grabbed him by the wrist. “I was being _neighborly_. _I_ was _offering_ something to _you._ ”

Bill wrenched his hand back. Tony had a tight grip.

“Back off, kid,” Bill snapped. “You’re out of your league. The Pines- es- _Pineses_ aren’t _your_ property. _You_ can’t trade anything that isn’t-”

Tony grabbed Bill by the elbow and threw him into the pool.

Bill stared up through the water in surprise, then burst back out through the surface.

“Okay!” Bill shouted. “Now you’re pissing me off!”

Tony was nowhere in sight.

_Fucking fuck!_

Bill sped out of the memory, slamming the door behind him. No more nice demon. He was going to get back to Mabel and then shove Tony’s face into a toilet or something. Something about Tony’s demeanor suggested that he’d done the same to someone before, now it was his turn!

He’d left Mabel in a bit of a rush, for no reason at _all,_ he just didn’t want to spend any more time being cutesy and flower crown-sy with her, and finding her again was proving a little harder than he’d anticipated.

Now, if he were Mabel, where would he be? Shoving Tony’s head in a toilet! No, that was him. What did Mabel do a lot of? Bill snapped his fingers. _Sleeping_. For every moment she’d been awake with Bill, there were at least five times as many where she was taking a “well-deserved break,” in her own words. Where did Mabel like to sleep? In a bed! And if her Mindscape was set up like the Shack, Bill should be able to find her bedroom!

Bill couldn’t believe it was that easy! And here he’d just been opening the coolest looking doors. There’d been one really sick one with a knocker. Bill turned and started in the direction of where the staircase would normally be. The halls around him seemed to shift, becoming less long, less winding, and more… Shack-y. Nice. Bill found the staircase and drifted up. He found the door to Mabel’s bedroom and opened it.

Nothing.

Welp. Time to give up forever.

Wait. That was Dipper’s bedroom.

Bill turned and opened the door to Mabel’s bedroom. Bingo. Her bedroom. And a closet. He drifted over to the closest and sure enough, there was Mabel’s field. He closed the door behind him.

“Hey, kid!” Mabel was out cold. Bill started toward her. “Kid, wake up!”

Mabel sat up, yawning. Bill sped toward her and nearly collided with her. “... Bill?”

“Hey-hey! I was worried I wouldn't find you again!”

She rubbed her eyes. “Here I am.”

“You up?”

“Bill, I don't wanna talk to you right now.”

“So what do you wanna do?”

She hit her head against him. “Sleep, mostly.”

Bill pushed her head back.  “Kid, listen to me. This Tony guy is serious stuff.” _He thinks you're his._ He thought the Pineses were _his_. “We need to get him out. So can you wake up?” Bill took Mabel’s hand. “I mean, for real.”

Mabel shook her head.

“Can you try?”

“I tried right away, but I couldn't. That's why I decided to stay in here.”

“You know what, it doesn't matter. Let's just go tell your family that.”

“I don't know about-”

“Come on, they'll look out for you.” Bill took Mabel’s hand. “It's not like you'll be all alone when you wake up. Should we go find them?”

“Do you really think it's a good idea?”

“Definitely. Absolutely!”

Mabel stared at him for a moment. She looked so tired. Then she squeezed Bill’s hand. “Actually… Yeah. You're right. I need to wake up. Dipper was right, I can't just _hide_ from Tony. Let’s go.”

Mabel stood up and they left the field. She shivered.

“It's even worse out here.”

“What?”

Mabel shook her head, dropping his hand. “All of it. There’s way too much energy- it's all so loud- it's all so close-”

“You don't need to worry, that's normal,” Bill assured her. “You'll warm up to it.”

Mabel shook her head harder, screwing her eyes shut, and covering her ears. “No, _no._ This is all just- it's all everywhere and it's inside me and oh _man_ -”

“Don’t worry, that’s fine. You’ll get used to it.”

Mabel opened her eyes to look up at him.

“Uh,” Bill said.

“It’s like this all the _time_? For you?”

Bill shrugged. “You get used to it.”

Mabel’s hands started to fall. “Oh, Bill, I’m so sorry-”

“What? No, it’s-”

There were sounds on the staircase. Bill moved to put himself between the door to the bedroom and her.

“The odds are kinda in our favor here,” Bill hissed. “I mean, of the three other people here, two of th-”

“Hello?” Ford called. Mabel dropped her hands.

“Is it him?” Bill asked.

“I- I can't-”

The door was flung open, and Ford aimed his gun at them.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SORRY IT'S SO LATE


	12. Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ungh, i have to start classes again the day after tomorrow... here's a chapter to cheer us all up!

_It was a cold and endless sky above_

_When he decided he was through with love_

_The leaves were piles of skeletons_

_And he was only skin and bones_

_And then he went to the bridge so he could fall_

_And drop down far away from it all_

_But the water looked so black and deep_

_And he closed his eyes and he went to sleep_

_Til the next day_

_-        “A Thread Cut With a Carving Knife” Stars_  

* * *

 

“Mabel?” Ford asked, his finger sliding off the trigger. He'd caught sight of Bill and followed him up here, thinking it might be best to watch him. To his shock, he'd opened the door to see Mabel with him, and Bill doing everything he could to put himself between her and the door.

What the hell?

“Grunkle Ford!” Mabel screamed, and threw herself at him. Ford dropped his gun to catch her, and they both plummeted to the floor. “We were just talking about you guys!”

“Hang on, hang on!” Bill cried out, pulling Mabel back. “Tony can shapeshift.”

“Grunkle Ford, show me your star tattoo!”

“Wh- _no-”_

Mabel gave Bill a thumbs up. “We’re cool!”

“I'll go grab the other one!” Bill turned. “Don’t move!”

“What-”

Bill disappeared through the door.

“-the hell?” Ford finished. He squeezed Mabel. “Well, I'm- glad to see you're alright, at least.”

Mabel dug her hands into his back. “I’m so glad to see _you_! It feels like I haven't seen you in years!”

Ford patted her shoulder. “It’s alright, sweetie. There's no need to cry.”

She buried her face in the crook of his neck and began to weep. That had been bad advice.

“Just tell me what’s going on and what you need me to do,” Ford suggested. “Just tell me what the problem is.”

Mabel sat up, wiping her nose. “His name is Tony. He’s a- he’s my- ex-b-b-boyfriend. We were really serious for awhile. Then we- I was- it-”

“It's okay.” Ford pulled her in closer. “It’s okay.”

“We were going to start a family together but then he- he kidnapped me- and he- he- and he tried to kill Dipper- and he kept stalking us until we split up but when Dipper came back to Gravity Falls and now he's after me again and I just-”

“What did he do?”

“He- he-”

Ford immediately regretted asking. “It's fine, Mabel, you don't have to-”

“He took my-” Mabel pushed back from him, pulling up her knees. “It's okay. He took my uterus.”

Ford frowned. “What?”

“After he kidnapped me, he- I was- he took my uterus away. I haven’t had a period in nine months. It all stopped. It's gone.”

“But… Why?”

“Because- I-” Mabel wiped her eyes. “I was pregnant. I was going to have his kid. We were going to be a family. Then I went in to get it all checked out and it was just- all gone. No kid. Nothing.”

Ford pulled her back in. “Mabel.”

“It's okay.”

“It's not your fault,” he told her her, and she started to cry harder. “None of this is your fault. You did your best.”

“It _is_ , I was such an idiot, I-”

“No. It's not. The only person at fault is him, for taking advantage of such a kind person, and-”

_Ford had told her she wouldn't understand._

His stomach was sinking like a rock in water. _That_ had been their last real conversation. Mabel had asked him about Bill and he'd told her she _wouldn't understand_. And here she was, with the same experience.

He was a real asshole, wasn't he?

Mabel buried her face in his shoulder again and sobbed.

“I’m so scared,” she managed to say. “I’m so _scared_ , Grunkle Ford, I…”

Ford stroked Mabel’s hair. There weren't any words to explain this guttural _pain_ ; his stomach was turning in on itself and his heart seemed cold and overflowing and too full to contain, it was like his insides had opened up and were falling apart and like they were retreating into himself, and he wanted to _yell_ and _scream_ and how could anyone hurt Mabel? How could anyone bring themselves to willfully hurt Mabel? How could he have let someone do this to her?

“Last time-” Mabel leaned back and blew her nose on her sleeve. “Last time he came after us Dipper nearly died. I almost let him die. And I couldn't even keep myself together- I _still_ can't keep myself together. I was so _stupid-_ ”

“No, no, no.” Ford squeezed her as tight as he could. “This isn't because of you. None of this is because of you.”

“Bill is.”

“... Bill isn't our biggest problem right now. Come on, let's get you up.” Ford stood slowly, and Mabel rose as well. “There's no need to take it all out on your sweater, here.” Ford reached into his coat and found a handkerchief. “And don't wear that thing, it's covered in snot. I'll carry it, you take my coat.” Ford shrugged off his coat and traded it with Mabel’s sweater. He tied it around his neck. “How do I look?”

Mabel gave him a small smile. “Like a prep.”

“Fantastic.”

Mabel pulled on the coat, and folded up the collar. “Thanks for the coat, Grunkle Ford.”

“Don’t mention it.” Ford picked his gun up off the ground. “My armory’s easier to reach this way.”

Mabel blew her nose on the handkerchief. “I’m sorry, I'm such a mess.”

“It's not your fault, sweetie, none of this is. That monster is the only at fault, and he’s going to pay if it's the last thing I do. Now. Let's get you cleaned up a bit.” Ford pulled his sleeve over his hand and leaned forward to dry her cheeks off. “There you are.”

“Can you tell I cried?”

“Not at all.”

“I don't want Dipper or Bill to think I cried.”

“They won't,” Ford reassured her. “Come on, let’s figure this out so we can finally have a conversation where one of us doesn’t cry. Once Dipper and Bill get back-”

Mabel grabbed Ford’s hand. “Grunkle Ford! I'm so sorry. I got so caught up- that was awful of me. I totally forgot. I'm so, _so_ sorry about Bill. It’s not Dipper’s fault or anything, I found him. I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I probably should have, but- well, I got mad, sometimes, and he listened to me. And I can do some cool stuff now and we get along. So I guess I was also scared you'd tell me not to talk to him. And I didn't want- you seemed happy sometimes. I didn't want you to worry about him.” Mabel hung her head. “I'm so sorry, Grunkle Ford.”

Ford smiled. “Honey, I understand. You're a kind soul. It's what you do.”

“Are you okay with Bill being here?”

“It's _fine_ , Mabel. Now, once they're back-”

“Really? Honest?”

Ford sighed, and took his glasses off. He cleaned them on the hem of his sweater. “No, of course not. But I want to deal with Tony first. Dipper gave us a confusing speech about it, and as much as I distrust Bill, at least I know who he is and what he does, and _where_ he is, and well- I don’t think he can really _do_ anything at the moment. And distrusting him is at least reliable and a good course of action. And if you don't mind... Tony is, well, he’s clearly having a strong emotional effect on you.”

“I’m sorry about Bill,” Mabel said. “We kind of ran into each other in the woods. I should have told you and Dipper about him still being around. It was probably a bad idea to try to hang out with him but… I did.”

“Of course you did.” Ford squeezed her hand. “You’re a friendly person. You see good in everything. Sometimes, though, it isn't there.”

Mabel shifted her weight.

“Mabel?”

“Grunkle Ford, I know this sounds- _really_ stupid and _so_ dumb and also probably really insensitive because of what happened with you guys but- I think I’m getting somewhere with Bill.”

“... What?”

“I don't know. This whole summer, he hasn't taken advantage of any situation we’ve been in. He's only possessing me because I asked him to, because of Tony. I had to convince him to do it. I don't think he’s changed or anything, but, I- I do think he has a shred of decency. Maybe even a few. Maybe even five or six shreds!”

Ford shook his head. “You know I won't believe that.”

“I know,” Mabel said glumly. “I don't trust him, honest! I’d never _really_ trust him. But this one time we got in a fight, and I got really mad at him, and afterwards he told me he didn't like that I was mad at him and wanted us to not be mad at each other, so that’s something, right? I asked him to stay away from our family but, if you and Dipper already know about him, well… I think… I think I could actually get somewhere with him.”

“You think you could become his friend.”

Mabel nodded.

Ford put his glasses back on. “I'm going to give you the go ahead, but it's _not_ because I think you can get somewhere with him. Bill will never, ever have any kindness in him. I'm agreeing because honestly, I need to figure out a way to kill him, and it would be good if he stuck around until then instead of disappeared. And keep in mind: he _is_ a killer. He wants to destroy the world as we know it. I'm not going to stop you from talking to him but you cannot, _cannot_ trust him.”

Mabel nodded. “Okay, thanks.”

“And you can't let him get near the portal. Or any rifts, etcetera.”

“... I won't.”

He couldn't read her expression. Ford pulled her in for a hug. “I’m proud of you.”

“What?”

“You tracked down one of the most dangerous creatures I've ever met and from what I've seen, you've done a good job keeping him on a leash. Nice one.”

Mabel flushed. “Thanks, Grunkle Ford.”

There was a knock on the door, then Dipper stuck his head in. “Mabel!”

“Dipper!”

Dipper dove across the room and tackled Mabel.

“Holy shit!” he shouted, his voice cracking. “You scared me so much!”

Bill appeared in the doorway and looked Ford directly in the eyes. Ford scowled at him.

Bill pointed outside the door.

Ford shook his head.

Bill pointed harder.

Ford pointed at Dipper and Mabel.

Bill flashed red. Ford narrowed his eyes, but stomped outside.

“This better be good,” he snapped, closing the closet door behind him.

“ _Oh,_ ” Bill said. “It is.”

Ford adjusted his grip on his gun, just in case Bill had forgotten he had it. “Then spill it, Cipher.”

“We’re in a pretty bad situation. You know that time the Titanic hit the iceberg? We’ve hit an iceberg.”

_“We?”_

“Your _kid_ has. She’s a sinking ship, and right now, you're on it. I'm on it. Both of them are. The only difference is that the iceberg is like, sentient and wants to beat up the boat or something.”

“What?”

“Tony,” Bill folded his arms. “I underestimated him, in large part because of how ridiculous he looks.”

“... Understandable.”

“Right! He looks like he's in a cartoon! I mean, he's not scary! But he _is_ scary. He's pretty damn scary.”

“And why is that?”

“He’s out for blood,” Bill said. “Number one. From my keen perception, and also privacy invasion, I've been able to gather that- maybe we shouldn't talk about this so close to the door.”

Bill drifted sideways. Ford frowned, but took a step away from the door.

“He’s kind of like an assassin,” Bill said. “Your kids grew up and Dipper did a lot of monster hunting and it earned him a pretty bad rep in some circles.”

“And you found this out by rifling through my grand niece’s memories.”

“Uh, _yeah, privacy invasion_! Anyway, Dipper is suddenly like, target number one, then he totally falls off the maps a little after he graduates high school. Because he’s making a _TV show._ A really _bad_ show-”

“I happen to _like_ Dipper’s show.”

“You’ve never seen it, but that's beside the point. This is where it gets _really_ creepy. He stalks Dipper for about a week before applying for enrollment at Mabel’s college. Which is a great school, by the way. Ask her about it.”

“I know about her school.”

Bill gave him a once over. “Nope. Anyway. Then he stalks _her._ I mean, you go into her memories, he's all over the place way before they were dating. He's just- he's always around, it's really weird. Then he _conveniently_ bumps into her one day and asks her out, but of course Mabel says no, because he's just this random guys, and he spews some crap about wanting to be friends which _of course_ Mabel falls for, and off they go. Then Tony gets her drunk at a party and convinces her to make out with him, and Mabel wakes up really hungover with a foggy memory and thinks she had this total realization of her feelings and they start dating. But this is where it gets _super bad.”_

Ford nodded.

“They have a totally normal relationship,” Bill said. “He completely stops manipulating the situation. Everything is hunky dory. If I didn't know how much of a shit bag he was I'd think they were just two kids in love. They go on stupid couple dates and do all this annoying couple stuff. He's practically adopted into their family. Then one day, out of the fucking blue, he says okay, that was nice, back to murder time! Except it's not out of the blue.”

“It's after she got pregnant.”

“Right-a-roonie. He proposed to her and they were all set to get married. Then just when things are coming together, bammo, he drugs her up and kidnaps her in the middle of the night, leaves town, somehow gets rid of her uterus and the baby, probably does a whole load of other shitty stuff, then just drive up. Dipper tracks her down but Tony’s not fucking done yet. He keeps kidnapping Mabel. He just takes her and dumps her somewhere else. Then comes the final straw day, which is the first day she's conscious when he kidnaps her, and he's a real bag of dicks, and to boot, he's still around when Dipper comes after her, and they both get _way_ too close to dying, so Dipper says, I'm going to fly you to Austria and Grenda can watch you on some nice peaceful manor where you can relax and he won't find you, I'll go back to my studio. So they split up. And Tony never comes after them again.”

“Until now.”

“Yup,” Bill said.

“And _you_ find this _bad_?” Ford asked, raising an eyebrow. “What does that say about you?”

“And that’s not all,” Bill said, shifting uncomfortably.

“Fine, I’ll bite. What else is there?”

“Spit it out.”

“The time when Mabel was fifteen.”

Ford’s mouth went dry. How did _Bill_ know about that?

“You seem oddly concerned about this.”

“I'm not concerned about _that,_ ” Bill rolled his eye. “I mean, like, _fuck_ all of _you_. I'm concerned because of this specific situation. You may not have picked up on this yet, but your kid is comatose. She's not going to wake up for at least another day, but she’s stuck in her own head with a power guzzling demon, me, which she’s barely adjusted to, _Tony_ who is also power guzzling and emotionally taxing, and it’s starting to wear her a little thin. Not to mention. You two. Poor thing was already exhausted and now she's going over the edge. Plus, she’s losing a lot of control. She hasn't been able to wake up or kick Tony out. To top it all off, _I’m_ stuck here, so I’m also a part of this mess.” So Bill was worried about himself. _That_ made sense. He reached up to fix his hat. “This whole thing has evolved into a terrible, sticky situation and we all need to get out before it gets worse.”

“Well, why don’t you start us off by getting the hell out?”

“It’s not that _simple._ ”

“Sure it is.”

Bill pulled his hat down over his eye. Ford wanted to scream. He’d let Bill get away with a _lot_ before he found out his true intentions, but he’d forgotten how _irritating_ he was. He’d never met someone so frustrating.

“Bill,” Ford said.

“I’m _stuck,_ ” Bill said.

“Then take your hat off.”

Bill took his hat off. “I’m stuck!” he shouted. “I can’t get out! Do you think I _like_ hanging out in random heads for days on end? Do you _know_ how many hours I’ve had to spend _sleeping_? It’s terrible! It’s awful! It’s the _worst!_ ”

“So… you can’t leave.”

“No! I can’t!”

“So… you’re trapped?”

“Yes!”

“Were you trapped before the coma?”

“I don’t know!”

“You don’t know.”

“ _I! Don’t! Know!_ Every single day has been the new worst day of my life!”

“Right,” Ford said. Bill being in a difficult situation was a nice change of pace. “That’s too bad for you. So, it looks as if the first order of business is to get Mabel to wake up.”

“Righto,” Bill said. “The only problem there is… that time when she was fifteen.”

“Why do you keep bringing that up?”

“Well. There’s the small possibility that she might have _willed_ herself into a coma.”

“Are you suggesting that Mabel willed herself into a coma, effectively trapping her with _you_ _and_ Tony?”

“I said it was small! But it’s there.”

“Why’d you drag me out here to tell me this?” Ford folded his arms.

“You’re reading too much into this,” Bill retorted, unfolding his arms. “What, do you think I'm about to spring some emotional bullcrap on you? Oh, that's _gross,_ and that's _rich_ coming from you. Oh, Fordsy, I've always loved you, I'm so so _sorr_ y for how _mean_ I was, take me into your ever loving arms, kiss me Stanford, you'd _like_ that, wouldn't you-”

“Stop talking!” Ford said, his voice rising and his cheeks going hot. “I’m not reading anything into it!”

“Oh, aren't you?”

“No! I’m just sick of _your_ games.”

“Right, you're sick.”

“And I do think it’s a little strange that you pulled _me_ out of a room instead of, say, explain this yourself to the person this is all about.”

“I have my reasons for everything, Fordsy.”

“You can’t throw me off with irritating nicknames. That’s not going to work.”

“Whatever you say, Fordsy.”

Ford gave him a cold look and opened the door. Mabel was grinning at Dipper, who seemed to be acting something out. Mabel held out her arms expectantly and he handed her his hat. She put it on.

“Aw, look how small they are!” Bill clapped his hands. This struck Ford as an odd remark, but he didn't point it out.

Dipper glanced at Ford, then Bill, and jerked his head toward the door.

“This is so great,” Bill said. “Everyone wants to talk to me. Don’t get too jealous, Fordy-boy. I still hate you the most.”

_“Stop.”_

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. In case it's not clear: Bill's possessing Mabel, but rather than manifesting in the Mindscape (as in Sock Opera) she's also inside the head with him! I do have a reason for this, all will be revealed, I promise. Some of their thoughts later on will be showcased based on left, center, and right alignments (that'll be fun to edit).  
> 2\. i am BIRD SITTING again my friends dropped off their bird and we're watching him for a few days i'm so happy!  
> 3\. i went on a really gay vacation and went to a drive-in theater!!! finding dory is real good guys.  
> 4\. finally started watching star vs and i'm pumped and afraid for the su nuke. also, finished the first season of twin peaks.  
> 5\. the youtube playlist for this is all set so the next update will probably have it! i'll also post a little snippet on they moved forward since this wasn't officially series until just now.  
> 6\. ALSO. also. okay. i did a weird thing which i that i made a fake wizard of oz in tmf (mabel and gideon's sleepover, summerween?) but then when i sat down to write this, i knew from the getgo i was going to have bill into very lynn (we'll meet again) and when i started to describe the bubble things just kind of went the way they did and i realized: so, vera is canon in the gravity falls universe thanks to bill's singing, and vera lynn did a cover of over the rainbow, so by extent, the wizard of oz is actually canon?
> 
> y'all have no idea how excited i am to be posting this fic!!!!


End file.
